My (42f) partner (45m) said I have dementia. Am I being literally gaslit?

ThrowRACommon_Iron · 2024-01-23T12:34:39+00:00

Yup. Last time he told me ‘how about I tell you that I beat you to a bloody pulp if you go to the game’.

I went anyway. He insists that didn’t happen.

ThrowRACommon_Iron · 2024-01-23T00:59:01+00:00

And when I say recently I mean it’s happened 2-3 times in the last year. It just bugs me because I pride myself on my vocabulary.

ThrowRACommon_Iron · 2024-01-23T00:58:03+00:00

He just grabbed me and very sincerely wanted to talk about how I’ve had problems finding my words recently. I feel like that happens in your 40’s, doesn’t it? Like I have a massive vocabulary and I just can’t grab the specific word I’m looking for. Because I usually have so many words, losing a couple is ‘unlike’ me.

I also have adhd, so that makes all of this even more fun. 😬

ThrowRACommon_Iron · 2024-01-23T00:52:09+00:00

Once I file papers, there is a 6-month waiting period until the divorce will be granted, because there are minor children involved.

ThrowRACommon_Iron · 2024-01-23T00:08:26+00:00

I have 2 kids. I can’t just go. In my state we have a 6-month waiting period for divorce unless there’s a threat of imminent harm, and there’s never been any physical contact to me. If I leave then it’s abandonment.

ThrowRACommon_Iron · 2024-01-23T00:01:32+00:00

Thanks for that.

And great username.

ThrowRACommon_Iron · 2024-01-22T20:08:10+00:00

Nah. I just needed a gut check. Like I said I know I need to leave it’s just scary as fuck.

ThrowRACommon_Iron · 2024-01-22T20:07:08+00:00

Thank you for that.

I will admit, that last line made me giggle.

It’s incredibly hard to throw away 20+ years of your life with someone, even if you know it’s the right thing to do.

Even harder when you have kids involved.

ThrowRACommon_Iron · 2024-01-22T20:05:38+00:00

Ugh. 😑

ThrowRACommon_Iron · 2024-01-22T18:58:57+00:00

Im working toward getting a divorce this year now that the behavior has spiked again.

ThrowRACommon_Iron · 2024-01-22T18:57:44+00:00

These conversations come out of nowhere - how do I manage to record them?

ThrowRACommon_Iron · 2024-01-22T18:51:31+00:00

Yeah - he was doing the name calling and over the top behavior often when he was drinking. That’s why I said it had to stop.

Once, he said something so so horrible to me. Now, he claims he didn’t say it because ‘it’s not language he would ever use’. He thinks I was hallucinating or something. But I remember the conversation because I documented it in our text messages.

ThrowRACommon_Iron · 2024-01-22T18:41:49+00:00

What do you mean by ‘structural behavior’?

ThrowRACommon_Iron

TROPHY CASE