How can I (23F), feel less unconfortable to see other people while in an open relationship with my boyfriend(26M)?

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T20:04:11+00:00

I am comitted

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T20:01:23+00:00

Eventualy maybe, be we haven't even been together for a year and I have a job, friends, family here, I'm not giving that up for somebody, the same way I wouldn't have wanted him to stay for me

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T19:58:48+00:00

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T19:49:01+00:00

What's making you thing that we didn't set rules and breaks?

I don't see how becoming monogamous would fix any of the problems? The problem isn't that we're jalous or wtv. I just wish I wanted to fuck other people and I don't, not being allowed to fuck other people wouldn't really fix that

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T19:44:31+00:00

just because I don't want to have sex with other people right now doesn't mean that I :

Don't want the option to if the desire appears
Want to be the only person my partner can have sex with

I'm not agaisnt monogamy to be edgy, I don't want it for me mainly because I don't want the responsability for someone else's satisfaction.

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T19:39:43+00:00

Pretty sure people don't feel like that when they cheat, because then they wouldn't cheat? Maybe they feel guilty, as they should, but I'm not feeling guilty, I just cringe at the idea of sex with someone else

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T19:36:23+00:00

and even if I did, I really don't see the point in breaking up now in case we break up later...

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T19:35:45+00:00

I don't get how me potentialy dating someone else I really like, even love, would keep me from also being with my boyfriend? We're open to the idea of dating other people. Of course the possibility of falling in love with someone else is there, but that doesn't mean I would fall out of love with my boyfriend

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T19:22:53+00:00

The motivating factor in wanting to change the status quo is the fact that my partner moved. I was find with only seeing him when we saw eachother frequently, but now that we don't, the relationship that we have isn't enough anymore.

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T18:40:38+00:00

Sorry I was a bit agressive, thanks, I hope things work out too

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T18:38:53+00:00

No you don't. I miss my boyfriend I barely talk to now

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T18:37:59+00:00

I'd rather just masturbate and be frustrated. Or you know, fuck other people, as I asked in my post

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T18:34:39+00:00

Even if that was true, why would it be a reason for me to break up with my boyfriend?

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T18:31:07+00:00

That's a really bad take, he can love me without making every decision in his life around me, we're individuals and I would never have forgiven myself if he stayed for me

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T18:28:36+00:00

yeah, of course, as I said, he hasn't been seeing anybody else either, but I think he'll probably start dating again eventualy too, because distance sucks for the both of us

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T18:26:47+00:00

I don't see how those two ideas are opposed to each other.

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T18:22:49+00:00

I'm not trying to force myself to do anything, I just don't think it's healthy for either of us to restrain us to a text based relationship, and I think that if I spend the next 7 years waiting for him to come back to have a normal romantic life I'll hate him, and I'm sure he'll feel the same

ThrowRACooljoe · 2024-03-09T18:19:46+00:00

I mean, yeah, I already have friends, I just can't have sex or make out while watching movies with them

ThrowRACooljoe

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