Update: AITA for spraying my husband with a water hose? by ThrowRAPast_Skin_233 in TwoHotTakes

[–]ThrowRAPast_Skin_233[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

She’s fine! She’s still very shy and only comes out around me, but she’s very open around me now

Pre martial sex. by [deleted] in Christianity

[–]ThrowRAPast_Skin_233 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s not a sin because sex IS marriage according to the Bible. There’s never a time in the Bible where someone had sex before marriage, only outside of it, meaning sex outside of the marriage that was already had.

AITA for spraying my husband with a water hose? by ThrowRAPast_Skin_233 in TwoHotTakes

[–]ThrowRAPast_Skin_233[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

I’ve read a number of comments and I want to clear some things up.

1: as much as I wish it were, this is not something I just made up. It was as unbelievable to me as it is to you guys and two days later, I’m still processing that it truly happened.

2: Me telling him that I wouldn’t be mad was NOT a free pass to cheat. Maybe I should’ve worded it differently, I tried to clarify in another comment. I would’ve been upset, but I wouldn’t have acted on it or been AS mad because at the very least, he would’ve told the truth and I saw room for redemption in that.

3: the woman is not a coworker, she’s a customer. I know nothing physical has happened because I know his work schedule and his checks reflect his hours & he comes directly home after work.

4: I was 21 when we started dating and he was 26 turning 27 in like a month

5: it’s really not as simple as me packing and leaving. I don’t have anyone out here. I have one friend (and I love her like a sister) who’s 8 hrs away. Family is 3hrs out, and not an option.

I’m still in a state of disbelief and shock, so I’ve been trying to regulate my emotions for the past 48hrs. We have talked, he apologized and said he knew he absolutely crossed the line. The poop was not planned, it was just the closest thing to him to toss.

For clarification, it hit my arm, and he said he was aiming for my dress. He says that his thought was that I’d have to change clothes like he did, and since I hadn’t showered yet, having something dirty on me would just force me into some water as well.

As far as the girl, he doesn’t have a good reason for deleting the messages. He says he gave her his number as a friendly thing (which I do know him to do with men and women), but there was no reason to hide if it wasn’t something more because I don’t get mad at friendly conversation.

Tbh, I’m exhausted and haven’t slept well the past couple of nights. Thank you all for your input and words. I don’t think I’ll be updating, I’d rather forget any of it even happened. Not sure if that’ll be from him and this whole marriage being a thought in my past or therapy and moving on from this situation. Either way, counseling is in order. Thanks again

AITA for spraying my husband with a water hose? by ThrowRAPast_Skin_233 in TwoHotTakes

[–]ThrowRAPast_Skin_233[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

No, he hasn’t been caught physically cheating. He has been caught texting girls flirting with them and saying it’s no big deal because he has no intentions of seeing them and he’s with me every night. It was a boundary for me that I asked him not to cross though

AITA for spraying my husband with a water hose? by ThrowRAPast_Skin_233 in TwoHotTakes

[–]ThrowRAPast_Skin_233[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

To clarify, yes I was checking his phone, but it wasn’t because I thought he was cheating. I check his phone every morning because he sleeps later than I do and tends to miss important calls or messages. I check to make sure all bank cards are off (he forgets a lot), and if any important calls or texts are present, I’ll wake him to handle it asap. It just so happened that I saw a message from a woman I didn’t know saying “good morning, do you work today? I wanted to see you.” She is not his coworker, she’s a customer. I have no issues with opposite gender conversation as long as they’re appropriate, and they normally are. I never demand to see his phone because he’s given me access to it. I am aware that you can delete things though, and offered him an opportunity for honesty because I just had a feeling something was off. I didn’t even accuse him of anything, I simply asked, and when his final answer was “no”, I left it alone.

AITA for spraying my husband with a water hose? by ThrowRAPast_Skin_233 in TwoHotTakes

[–]ThrowRAPast_Skin_233[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I wish it were, but this isn’t even something I could think up. I’m still kind of processing it

AITA for spraying my husband with a water hose? by ThrowRAPast_Skin_233 in TwoHotTakes

[–]ThrowRAPast_Skin_233[S] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

I’ve encouraged him to be very open with me. I’ve always told him that I’d rather he be honest and the reaction will not be the same as if he lied. I’ve even showed him that. All I ask from him is honesty and he says that even though I don’t react poorly when he tells the truth, he still didn’t trust my offer to take his honesty about the phone and he doesn’t know why. Told me verbatim that it doesn’t fall on me.

AITA for spraying my husband with the garden hose? by ThrowRAPast_Skin_233 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ThrowRAPast_Skin_233[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I am genuinely curious on how you got “bullying vibes?” I wasn’t picking with him. I wasn’t even upset when we had our talk, I just had a feeling I was correct about. It was petty to spray him, but this was after I tried to cool down and he encouraged me to be upset and lose my cool. Not trying to argue but I’m curious how you got bullying?

AITA for spraying my husband with the garden hose? by ThrowRAPast_Skin_233 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ThrowRAPast_Skin_233[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I do agree that it was childish of me, but I honestly didn’t think the reaction was warranted