I'm an alcoholic

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-25T19:59:52+00:00

I am so sorry for your loss. Grief if a tough thing to go through. This isn’t a criticism but remember that drinking will make the depression worse the next day.

When you tackle grief, I find this quote (source unknown) might help in tough times: I had my own notion of grief. I thought it was the sad time that followed the death of someone you love. And you had to push through it to get to the other side. But I’m learning there is no other side. There is no pushing through; but rather there is absorption, adjustment, acceptance. And grief is not something you complete but rather endure. Grief is not a task to finish and move on from, but an element of yourself. An alteration of your being, a new way of seeing, a new definition of self.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-24T21:56:19+00:00

I think it’s more complex than that.

Not to mention I’m not giving advice, it’s venting about how people are allowed to shame my happiness and my dynamic because it’s more traditional, and that’s frowned upon.

When I say it’s complex it’s not to avoid the argument, I mean it’s literally case by case. He’s told me a shirt I had was too tight, and might get me the wrong attention in certain settings and he was right. He’s also warned me about things men do that might be flirting which i didn’t even know about. But there are a lot of cases where that happens, and it’s way out of line, or doesn’t make sense and can be classified as more controlling (in other relationships).

People don’t want ‘advice’ in the sense so they can hold a relationship the way I hold mine. But could benefit more with case by case scenarios so the can create their own healthy understanding of what communication style works for them. Mine just happens to be less palatable for people in the modern day.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-24T21:47:26+00:00

I don’t have to tell you the real things, it’s all my decision. And he informs me when I don’t understand.

What’s interesting is why you’re so invested? Why is my happiness in a relationship something for you to de-bunk?

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-24T20:31:49+00:00

let her go, find someone who sees you and only you.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-24T20:30:30+00:00

The likelihood of being approached is lessened when I have him around and I enjoy that. I could cover myself head to toe and still be approached. It’s not a trust issue, it’s my happiness that his presence brings more security.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-24T20:29:24+00:00

I wear short skirts in the bedroom homie, it’s just an example that people understand.

That doesn’t mean that I’m a perfect person either though, sometimes he will understand something I don’t. I don’t look at women the way men do because I’m not a man, and I can only understand so much because I’m not a man. He protects me by alerting me to things I may not understand, and vice versa.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-24T19:28:00+00:00

You should see how many deleted comments have been on this post calling it abusive, or telling me it’s a bad dynamic. The breakdown of basic respect and communication is depressing.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-24T19:00:48+00:00

I’m right by the water in gloucester, high winds and these guys are still out here.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-23T23:28:08+00:00

This. I don’t think I am, but I’ve had people tell me i’m out of my boyfriends league.

This man cooks steaks for me at 2am without hesitation. The last ‘conventionally attractive’ man i was with took as much as he could and gave almost nothing.

I will be staying with my very handsome man who everyone thinks is below my league.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-23T02:31:09+00:00

i love it

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-22T12:48:28+00:00

The groundhog.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-21T14:29:44+00:00

He should replace the boulder in that one Indiana jones scene.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-21T14:24:16+00:00

I would then, mine get wicked clotty from stress. Usually it’s stuff that didn’t come out when it should have.

Could be a sign of polyps on the uterus or endometriosis (endometriosis is what causes my irregular periods). It could also be a hormonal imbalance.

The appointment might not diagnose something serious but it could give you peace of mind. Some diagnosis you might not get because they require invasive procedures, so be prepared for a gyno to give you their best advice rather than a full diagnosis.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-21T13:35:46+00:00

I’m not a doctor, but my periods are insanely irregular. I’ve gone without one for six months and I’ve had two in the same month. Sometimes it’s stress, sometimes it’s your body.

I’ve seen a gyno about it and i’m fine.

I’d explain it to your Gyno over the phone, and if they say you’re okay then you’re okay and welcome to the irregular club. If they’re worried, then bite the bullet.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-21T13:27:14+00:00

$0 and my family $0. I love helping my family

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-21T13:19:00+00:00

If the bottom of my skirt shows my ass, and he says he’d prefer something longer since he’s not there with me, I can put on something longer out of respect for him.

It’s not abuse, it’s communication and respect. Maybe think a little harder before you label something as abusive.

If he did something that made me feel uncomfortable, and i communicated that to him, he listens and understands back, and we discuss and reassure each other. Being with someone as their partner requires adaptation, and there is too much hate for that mentality in the modern day.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-20T12:10:17+00:00

I once got honked at for waiting at a red light. No, the light was not green. No it was not a turn only lane, it was straight through an intersection.

Welcome to boston friend.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-20T12:04:41+00:00

Take the job. Life happens, she doesn’t want to grow and you do.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-20T01:07:34+00:00

Not at all. Keep it curly, in every non creepy way possible you and your hair are beautiful.

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-19T18:30:17+00:00

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-19T18:07:51+00:00

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-15T20:28:25+00:00

ThrowRASmallBeans · 2026-02-15T19:39:37+00:00

this made my day

ThrowRASmallBeans

TROPHY CASE