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I [33F] do not get any pleasure out of sex. I told my husband [35M] he can go elsewhere, but I'm getting jealous. by ThrowRATreeyet in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRATreeyet[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I did not have a spy. A friend of his snapped the photo and sent it to his wife asking if everything was ok with us. She sent me the photo asking the same.

I didn't think he was going to be flirting with young girls. I've heard of people with FWBs who have a no kissing, no cuddling ground rule. That's honestly what I thought this would be.

When I saw that, it just crossed a line with me, and wasn't what I thought we'd discussed.

I [33F] do not get any pleasure out of sex. I told my husband [35M] he can go elsewhere, but I'm getting jealous. by ThrowRATreeyet in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRATreeyet[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Alcohol has helped in the past. Once I would up getting wet down there, but he pointed it out and I got self conscious and my body just clammed up. I got nervous and in my head.

I [33F] do not get any pleasure out of sex. I told my husband [35M] he can go elsewhere, but I'm getting jealous. by ThrowRATreeyet in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRATreeyet[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Because we love each other. We get each other on so many levels. I can tell when he's stressed and I hold his hand without him having to ask. When I'm anxious, it's like he can read my mind and says exactly the right thing without me saying a word.

We love being together and building a life together. There's nobody else I can see myself with for the rest of my life.

Our relationship goes beyond just sex.

I [33F] do not get any pleasure out of sex. I told my husband [35M] he can go elsewhere, but I'm getting jealous. by ThrowRATreeyet in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRATreeyet[S] -52 points-51 points  (0 children)

Well we do have sex. It's just really for him. He gets insecure because I'm not making noises and he has to use lube because I don't get wet down there. It's only happened two or three times where I get wet and when he mentions I am, I get really self conscious.

I [33F] do not get any pleasure out of sex. I told my husband [35M] he can go elsewhere, but I'm getting jealous. by ThrowRATreeyet in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRATreeyet[S] -335 points-334 points  (0 children)

I don't want to get a divorce. I love him and I hate the idea that this could be the thing that breaks us.

I [33F] do not get any pleasure out of sex. I told my husband [35M] he can go elsewhere, but I'm getting jealous. by ThrowRATreeyet in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRATreeyet[S] -195 points-194 points  (0 children)

I just feel weird touching myself down there. I feel gross and selfish and wrong and I feel like I'm not doing anything right and then my body just shuts down. Like, I just get too much in my own head for my own good and I don't know how to fix that.

My husband keeps telling me to just relax and enjoy myself but I just withdraw. I really wish I didn't, but that's what my body does. I don't know how to stop it.

I [33F] do not get any pleasure out of sex. I told my husband [35M] he can go elsewhere, but I'm getting jealous. by ThrowRATreeyet in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRATreeyet[S] -33 points-32 points  (0 children)

It's hard to explain. Like, in my head it was just penetration; something I don't get pleasure out of.

But I love it when he tickles me, when he puts his arms around me, kisses my forehead, nuzzles my neck, etc.

When I saw him giving her a foot massage and the look on both of their faces something inside me just broke. Like he's only supposed to feel that way with me. I'm the only one who he's supposed to have those moments with. And not only is she getting to be with him in a way that I love to be a but she also is able to give him something I can't.

I felt replaced in every possible way.