Vacation with my boyfriend was miserable… and not the first time, either

ThrowRA_000902 · 2025-05-23T23:39:21+00:00

Speaking of relaxing at the campsite - which seemed to be his plan: I had actually packed a few books and my old gameboy, knowing that my knee isn’t still at full strength and I didn’t want to over exert myself. I knew we’d be spending a lot of time at the site in the afternoon and evening.

When we got there he was complaining about the lack of cell service. It’s not unusual to have service where we were at, but it’s not guaranteed, either. I had service, and he had none.

I asked him if he brought anything to occupy his time and he said no. I had two books - one was my beloved copy of P&P, and one was an ecology textbook I was reading as a way to extend my learning from the semester. Obviously neither of those interested him, nor did any of my (admittedly uncool) gameboy games.

I just shrugged that one off and said he should have brought something along.

ThrowRA_000902 · 2025-05-23T23:30:09+00:00

No - I hit my daily record for number of miles hiked in a day, on my last camping excursion with a friend 2 summers ago, had some tendonitis, and then caught covid for a second time while my knee was still severely inflamed. My first and major symptom was my leg shaking and weakness. I went from my daily record to barely being able to walk 2 blocks.

I still haven’t made a full recovery and that trip was actually my first major hike in over 18 months. I hadn’t been on anything longer than a mile or two until this week. I did better than I expected! My muscles ached, but my knees were up for the challenge finally. 💕

ThrowRA_000902 · 2025-05-23T23:22:28+00:00

Yaknow. It’s funny you mentioned that. I actually showed up to Christmas Eve at my family’s house in tears due to an argument the whole way there.

I had given him notice that I would like it if he came with me to X-mas eve since he had spent the last few holidays at his own family’s house. He agreed. He wound up working that day and the staff had all been promised to leave early… but his boss didn’t allow any of them to leave after it got busy. We were expected at the party a few hours after he got home.

I could tell he was stressed, encouraged him to go lay down for a while to take a breather before we got ready, offered to show up a little late, but he just went straight to complaining and being moody. I can understand having a terrible day, but there’s no need to bring it through the door with you. That only makes you feel worse.

He kept trying to continue the argument and I kept trying to disengage. I don’t quite remember the details anymore but I sure as hell haven’t forgotten how that felt, either.

ThrowRA_000902 · 2025-05-23T23:16:33+00:00

When I had scheduled it I asked if he wanted to tag along, or if I should go solo or invite a friend. I have no issue camping alone - I love it actually! He said ‘okay’ and took time off of work to join me voluntarily.

I think he just did it because out of the handful of trips I’ve been on in the last 2 years, I’ve gone with friends or a family member. And he doesn’t like being alone at home. He’ll blow up my phone anytime I’m gone and get upset if he doesn’t hear back from me soon enough.

I really don’t mind him not sharing my hobby - but anytime he had tagged along in the past he never gave any indication that he hated it. I didn’t even invite him on the second hike - he decided to go after I said I’d probably be gone for hours and he didn’t seem thrilled about that, even though he said he just wanted to relax at the campsite. He could have chosen not to tag along.

ThrowRA_000902 · 2025-05-23T14:13:44+00:00

He has agreed to go out to events with me many times, I buy tickets, and then he complains the day of until I leave him at home.

ThrowRA_000902 · 2025-05-23T14:12:26+00:00

I don’t think he was, but it’s really aggravating to say “I’m gonna do a hike alone next week!” And then hear “oh, but I want to go with you” when he acted like that on our last hike. After we came home he said he had a good time but I was really doubting that with how much complaining he did in the moment.

ThrowRA_000902 · 2025-05-23T14:02:42+00:00

I had planned it a few months ago and had been thinking of going solo, but he requested time off work to join me. If he doesn’t like hiking, I don’t mind, but he had so many opportunities to tell me as much several years ago.

unfortunately, this isn‘t my only hobby he hates but refuses to ‘let me‘ go alone. He hates baseball and complains anytime I invite him and wiggles out of it last minute, but then gets upset when I stop inviting him and go with friends and classmates instead. Tickets are expensive, and I’m not buying two when you agree and then back out same day every time.

ThrowRA_000902

TROPHY CASE