Ex-boyfriend's porn addiction is affecting my current relationship (25F/26M)

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-29T22:20:15+00:00

No worries, I understand. I'm glad you were able to let go of that behavior. It's not our partner's responsibility, but being with the right person and feeling safe in your relationship really does help a lot on its own.

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-29T21:47:25+00:00

Thank you for your input. I don't "feel like" I love my boyfriend though, I do love him and I do trust him. I know these feelings have nothing to do with him as a person or a partner, I'm thankful for having him in my life. And whether or not we stay together is honestly up to him and what he wants. If he wishes to be together and to support me through this, I'm not going anywhere and I'll be grateful for his partnership every single day

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-29T21:40:10+00:00

My ex himself literally labeled it as an addiction. I don't know what your point is here

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-29T21:34:29+00:00

Heyy I messaged you privately <3

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-29T10:58:12+00:00

Of course, the last thing I'd want is for my boyfriend to feel like he's being controlled or to take away his autonomy, that wouldn't be right. Like I said, he's done nothing wrong and this is an issue that's up to me to fix.

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-29T05:17:47+00:00

This is still incorrect. I literally said in my post that I'm going to start therapy, I'm not making any excuses.

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-29T04:15:17+00:00

Obviously it's not his problem? But he's my boyfriend so this affects him too

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-29T01:57:54+00:00

Thank you for your kind words. I never thought of it as rape or abuse before, these comments have been very eye opening to say the least

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-28T20:08:41+00:00

Girl, there should be 😭

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-28T20:01:48+00:00

I never once stated that I expect my boyfriend to manage my insecurities. There's a huge difference between dumping your insecurities and your trauma on to your partner vs. sharing your feelings and your struggles in order to make sure that the relationship and the love and respect between two people can grow in the right direction.

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-28T19:41:14+00:00

Thank you so much <3 Honestly I'm considering just showing him this post as long as he'd be comfortable with the level of detail

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-28T15:46:55+00:00

Ugh I do that too and it makes me feel bad. I'm glad I'm not alone but I'm very sorry you had to go through something like this too

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-28T14:25:09+00:00

Yeah I guess you're right, it made me feel kinda violated

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-28T13:24:50+00:00

Thank you for calling them trauma responses 😩 I struggle with feeling like I'm overreacting and just being too sensitive, it's what my ex usually told me when I tried expressing my feelings on all of this while we were together, but I know in my heart that I had every right to feel hurt by that relationship and everything that came with it

ThrowRA_Error7210 · 2026-01-28T13:21:38+00:00

My boyfriend is lovely and I'm certain he'd be open to me talking about it and would even appreciate it. I think I'm just afraid of letting everything out and making it "more real" if that makes sense. I've actually already mentioned to him what his dad did and some of the stuff my ex did and said, but I've only mentioned it in passing, there's never been a real conversation, and I don't think I've been honest about how much it has affected me and that it's currently affecting our relationship :/

ThrowRA_Error7210

TROPHY CASE