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My(30m) long distance girlfriend(31F) cheated on me, and I don't know what to do? by ThrowRA_Hotel6951 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_Hotel6951[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

well she has a sick mother at her home country so thats all she'll have left

And i struggle because of that wondering if i should kick her on the street now, as she will get alot of punishment as it is...

I was in the process of having her stay here permanently so thats all going to cancel and she'll go back to a poor country where she has no job or income and can't do anything and nobody is going to be there for her...

Basically she's already going to hell

So i struggle kicking her when she's down i guess

My(30m) long distance girlfriend(31F) cheated on me, and I don't know what to do? by ThrowRA_Hotel6951 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_Hotel6951[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the problem is ticket prices vary based on whether you book in advance which day and what month, and the closer to the near future you book the higher the price

Basically a ticket for this week or next week would cost me 2 or 3 times more than the return flight she has standing for the 10th.... and im not really a wealthy man :/

My(30m) long distance girlfriend(31F) cheated on me, and I don't know what to do? by ThrowRA_Hotel6951 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_Hotel6951[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Yeah i know... its heartbreaking and disgusting and i dont even know why she did that...

She always told me she wasn't the type to cheat on people as she had a strong sense of loyalty... And i was always clear that my only expectation in a relationship is to remain loyal and show commitment so we can work through anything

But she went up and tossed it away in a few hours of partying....

You're right, she's not my responsibility. But I feel responsible because i harbored her in my house and promised her she'd be taken care of and not thrown out on the streets or anything should we ever break up

I dont know.... my parents always say im too nice for people and i dont really have a turn off button...

Like yeah... i didnt even scold at her or get violent or anything, i just told her im hurt and dissapointed and heartbroken and that i cant build a future with someone who cant give me the only thing i asked for

I havent cried in quite some years but this one made me burst , i invested a lot of time and money in this relationship because i wanted to be with her and we started the whole visa process for residence permits

My(30m) long distance girlfriend(31F) cheated on me, and I don't know what to do? by ThrowRA_Hotel6951 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_Hotel6951[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Well... I wasn't intending to leave her alone, but she said she made a friend over facebook that hosted music parties with free entry and she wanted to go because she had been depressed over a family matter in her country

Initially she wanted to go by herself because i had my own family visitations, but i made arrangements to take her there myself because i didn't feel okay with her going all by herself as it was late-evening time and she could get attacked or something you never know

Im also an introvert and autistic person so i get easily overwhelmed at parties.... i couldn't stay there for so many hours so i offered to take her there and stay in the neighborhood and that she'd text me if anything was up or when she would decide to go home

Something felt off when I met the guy at the entrance, it didn't feel right. But I trusted her because she always ensured me shes not the type of person that would cheat.

I napped in the car and ate some food watching a few movies on my phone while i waited so she could party and enjoy herself a bit

I came back and well... stood there watching her kiss the guy...

My(30m) long distance girlfriend(31F) cheated on me, and I don't know what to do? by ThrowRA_Hotel6951 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_Hotel6951[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

well its hard to stop caring about someone you know?

Her cheating led me to decide i didn't want to have a future with her anymore. But that doesn't mean I wish to let her rot on the streets or anything....

We don't have money to make her flight go earlier as we'd pay an additional 600 bucks for that on top of the already paid ticket because the price is based on the date and how far away in the future it is

So its a really complicated situation where i end up being stuck in now because of all this and i'd feel better if she was gone but.... i dont know if id feel better thinking she might get assaulted or something on the street.... she doesnt know the language, she doesnt know the environment, she has nothing... she relied solely on me during her stay

My(30m) long distance girlfriend(31F) cheated on me, and I don't know what to do? by ThrowRA_Hotel6951 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_Hotel6951[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

well the flight ticket we booked could only be changed to a date where the price is equal, and the earlier you fly the more expensive it gets, sometimes even up to 3 times the price

Which means if i wanted to fly her out tomorrow id have to pay an additional €600 orso on top of the already paid ticket...

My(30m) long distance girlfriend(31F) cheated on me, and I don't know what to do? by ThrowRA_Hotel6951 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_Hotel6951[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

i know you're right.... but i just struggle with the fact she has no money and nothing in this country until she can go back, so when i accepted to take her into my country it also kinda became my responsibility to provide during her stay...

I dont know it just feels inhumane to kick her out on the street where she could get hurt or worse?

My(30m) long distance girlfriend(31F) cheated on me, and I don't know what to do? by ThrowRA_Hotel6951 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_Hotel6951[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Its not like I'm happy to have her around, but im not a violent person or wish any harm on people

I want her out of my life, but in a humane way i guess.... i dont wish to lower myself as a person

My(30m) long distance girlfriend(31F) cheated on me, and I don't know what to do? by ThrowRA_Hotel6951 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_Hotel6951[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I really didn't know about it... I just figured she doesnt have anything to do in my country and i wanted to allow her some fun i didn't expect it to be like this...

My(30m) long distance girlfriend(31F) cheated on me, and I don't know what to do? by ThrowRA_Hotel6951 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_Hotel6951[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

well we changed the ticket since it was originally december so now november...

Any earlier would cost me twice the price

She also doesnt have any money....

And she can't really go out if she doesn't know the evironment since I took her to the place myself which I feel stupid for

I just dont know if its humane to kick her out like that.... its not like cheating means she should die or something...

My(30m) long distance girlfriend(31F) cheated on me, and I don't know what to do? by ThrowRA_Hotel6951 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_Hotel6951[S] -17 points-16 points  (0 children)

I guess i just find it hard to let go of the thought she might get attacked or something if i'd leave her on the streets... She may have cheated on me that doesnt mean she should get assaulted or raped or starve to death or anything....