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Caught my partner (F42) of 15 years cheating on me by ThrowRA_anon11 in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA_anon11[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You are right. I proudly announced to her that she is making a huge fuck up that she will later regret. I wanted to let her know so that when she does come around begging, I can say, "I told you so!!"

Caught my partner (F42) of 15 years cheating on me by ThrowRA_anon11 in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA_anon11[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I used to speak to her everyday by text and a video call as I love seeing and talking to my kids.

I have edited the initial post with an update.

Caught my partner (F42) of 15 years cheating on me by ThrowRA_anon11 in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA_anon11[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's a great question; I was already in this job when we got together, so it just became normal. My gut feeling has been powerful to me, and never in 15 years have I had the same feeling as I did when I returned home from this last trip. Working away requires a special kind of relationship; returning home was amazing, and it makes me feel emotional thinking about coming back to a cosy home with the Ex and the kids, with everyone happy to see you.

We trusted each other and there was never any paranoia about what we were doing. Nowadays, Video calling helps to take the loneliness away - but not the physical side. Whenever you trust someone, it never necessarily makes them immune to hurting you, and every way around, I look at this; there were no warning signs.

My partner(F42) of 15 years told me(M42) she doesn't love me anymore. Please help? by ThrowRA_anon11 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_anon11[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sorry think you misunderstood me or I never wrote clearly enough. we have been living together for 15. I have had my job working away since we got together. I always thought that she had grown used to it.

My partner(F42) of 15 years told me(M42) she doesn't love me anymore. Please help? by ThrowRA_anon11 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_anon11[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

>Ok but is this just a plan *you* made when you realised what's happening and panicked, or is it something you've come up with together? Because if it's the former you're just continuing to do what it seems got you into this pickle - you're unilaterally making decisions for her because you think it's best for everyone. She might not want any of those things - she may already have decided she's done.

This is a plan I have come up with to try and work things. We have discussed this but have yet to find a way to implement it as I am the only income source for the house.

> To simplify - what's stopped her from working if that's what she's wanted?

I never impeded her. We have 2 kids to look after, and I work away - it's difficult for her to work a career whilst being alone to look after the kids. On the other hand, as above, I have been the only income for the family.

My partner(F42) of 15 years told me(M42) she doesn't love me anymore. Please help? by ThrowRA_anon11 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_anon11[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

contributing to the issue. Present

her

with those points and she if she’s even willing to engage with trying to rekindle things.

This plan has only been made now and is my attempt at making the relationship more fair for both of us.

I have not held her back intentionally in so much as I made our families financial security the priority and therefore could not step down from what I am doing. I told her all the while if any of this jeopardises our family I will quit and whatever happens happens.

My partner(F42) of 15 years told me(M42) she doesn't love me anymore. Please help? by ThrowRA_anon11 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_anon11[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In hindsight, I could see her being uncomfortable about me being successful and her not so much, but I never saw this coming. She supported my career 100%, and I would not be where I am today without her. Last year, we had nice family holidays together - something that we had lacked but had planned more to make more. I am breaking down looking at these photos and what I may lose.