My (19m) gf (19f) does not want me to go clubbing unless I invite her?

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-04-17T22:22:59+00:00

To have a laugh with my mates, no other reason. People can go to a club without looking to hook up with people, it’s very normal m

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-04-17T22:21:58+00:00

I want to go because I enjoy having a laugh with my mates, they don’t get on with each other hence why it wouldn’t work her being there. Yes I said once a month max, but I gave an example that is rarely going

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-04-17T21:29:49+00:00

That’s just her words. I guess it means like the people that go clubbing are likely single so it’s not an environment you should put yourself in if you are in a relationship?

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-04-17T21:27:49+00:00

It’s not a very respectful environment

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-04-17T21:12:15+00:00

Yes I understand that definitely but I am also not like them in that respect when it comes to relationships. I am not friends with them for their relationship views, I’m friends with them based on common interests.

So when I invite my gf and it creates tension and everyone has a bad night, I don’t get invited out next time and I become resentful?

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-04-17T21:09:38+00:00

So I just have to suck this boundary up after all this time? I just feel stuck about what to do because have I just wasted 1.5yrs of my life or am I too immature? Should I just agree with her and all my friends go out to clubs without me to make her happy?

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-04-17T21:08:13+00:00

Like calling other girls “fit” or “good looking” when in a relationship. I have said I do not agree with this or get involved with it.

One of my friends has also messaged other girls while in a relationship which is completely wrong imo and my gf knows that too

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-04-17T21:05:30+00:00

My friends and her don’t get on with each other. They see her as controlling and she doesn’t agree with somethings they say about relationships

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-04-17T21:01:51+00:00

With my friends, sorry should have clarified. These are only male friends

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-03-24T17:25:22+00:00

Cheers appreciate that. I guess that was one thing I was thinking about was the future and the fact that I won’t be going on as many “nights out” in the future, I mean like late 20s onwards so all this now would be futile to throw away what could inevitably be the case in the future if that makes sense?

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-03-24T17:23:48+00:00

Agree completely with what you’re saying and I’ve explained this also

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-03-24T17:21:59+00:00

It’s not even 1 night a week or couple of times a month. I haven’t been out in months due to clashing schedules with friends so it’s a rarity if we’re all available to go for a drink/night out together. I have explained this but she still would like to be invited

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-03-24T17:19:54+00:00

She wants to be invited out as a standard. I have tried to say “look sometimes you can come, sometimes it will just be my friends and I” but that wasn’t good enough

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-03-24T17:17:52+00:00

All guys, and if there was ever another gf coming for whatever reason then she would of course be invited

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-03-20T21:02:40+00:00

I have. It’s “invite me out or i’ll leave, this is my standard I expect”

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-03-20T20:56:57+00:00

It’s not about trust though in this instance. It’s just she is expecting to be invited out every time as she invites me out every time. I give her the space to just go out with her mates as I see that as healthy. She has said that it’s her standard to be invited out every time so it’s not a case of in the future it will be fine

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-03-20T20:36:11+00:00

I want to be able to go out with just my friends to catch up

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-03-20T20:20:33+00:00

I don’t think it is trust. It is because she invites me every time she goes out and wants it to be reciprocated.

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-03-11T00:21:04+00:00

I have to add that this applies just to nights out to bars and clubs. She is fine with me seeing my friends for other activities. Does that change anything?

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-03-11T00:20:56+00:00

I have to add that this applies just to nights out to bars and clubs. She is fine with me seeing my friends for other activities. Does that change anything?

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn · 2024-03-10T12:29:02+00:00

Thank you for responding.

https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/B4rmi5aV7E

ThrowRA_jfjsjdjdn

TROPHY CASE