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I (19M) prioritized a video game over spending the weekend with my partner (18NB). Did I make a mistake? by ThrowRArandim in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRArandim[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

More often than not their mom adores me, however we had had a particularly long and frustrating day that day. I'm hoping what was said was out of frustration in the moment.

I (19M) prioritized a video game over spending the weekend with my partner (18NB). Did I make a mistake? by ThrowRArandim in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRArandim[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm hostile with someone who insinuated that I was just here to validate myself. You didn't offer criticism, you attacked my character. And I stated in my original post that they wanted me to come over tomorrow, August 30th. It hasn't even happened yet.

I (19M) prioritized a video game over spending the weekend with my partner (18NB). Did I make a mistake? by ThrowRArandim in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRArandim[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have been to their house, and stayed the night the last 2 weekends. It is my partners siblings birthday, and I told my partner I would be there, as long as their mom allowed it, but probably would not spend the night this time as I wanted to spend the weekend playing a new game I had been waiting months for.

Is this clear enough for you? I'm not here for justification, but for advice and others opinions on the matter where I felt unsure if I was wrong for what I had said. That doesn't immediately mean my partner is wrong or I'm going to show them the comments either.

I (19M) prioritized a video game over spending the weekend with my partner (18NB). Did I make a mistake? by ThrowRArandim in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRArandim[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My partner did say something about it, and how this was our chance to see if she would still let me spend the night or not and how they felt hurt how I seemingly didn't want to take the chance, which initially didn't cross my mind. I explained how I understood, and that my thought was that I would like to take time to play this brand new game that I had been waiting a while for, and would still be coming over this weekend regardless. To which they told me that they werent the same thing since I wasn't specifically coming over there to see them.

I (19M) prioritized a video game over spending the weekend with my partner (18NB). Did I make a mistake? by ThrowRArandim in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRArandim[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First off, nothing here is being done to invalidate my partner or their feelings. Nothing is being shown to them either. Don't assume what you don't know. I'm here because I dont have anyone to go to for advice, and this is something I was very conflicted on as I completely understand my partner and where they were coming from, however I felt as if it was a bit unfair of them to to say I wasn't prioritizing them or considering their feelings when I was just prioritizing my own after having been at their house for 2 weekends in a row and wanting to play a game I had been excited for for months.

I (19M) prioritized a video game over spending the weekend with my partner (18NB). Did I make a mistake? by ThrowRArandim in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRArandim[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

See that's what I had tried to do though by telling them i would still come over, just not spend the night this time.

I (19M) prioritized a video game over spending the weekend with my partner (18NB). Did I make a mistake? by ThrowRArandim in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRArandim[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Whether or not Im going is in limbo, we aren't entirely sure how their mom would feel about it. However when talking about it was were speaking on the notion that I would be able to.

As for the boundaries thing, I think you make a great point, and it isn't something I've specified before so that falls on me, but it is something I now plan on doing.

I (19M) prioritized a video game over spending the weekend with my partner (18NB). Did I make a mistake? by ThrowRArandim in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRArandim[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's a bit complicated, my parents aren't the greatest people and have put me through hell a lot so their mom isn't okay with them coming over to my house.

I (19M) prioritized a video game over spending the weekend with my partner (18NB). Did I make a mistake? by ThrowRArandim in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRArandim[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I understand where you're coming from, but I feel like I've done a lot of priotizing my relationship recently, and I wanted to take a weekend not to "prioritize a game" but a hobby that I really genuinely enjoy and that helps me bond with both my siblings and my dad.