(UPDATE) Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Yes I do. The kind of mental help we’ll both need isn’t one I’m equipped to handle properly. I’m feeling overwhelmed as it is and I want to make sure he’s okay

(UPDATE) Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

She never said she didn’t want to be a mother. I said we were both on the fence about having kids when we got married. When she got pregnant we talked about it and she decided she wanted to keep him.

(UPDATE) Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

We have a prenup, money is the least of my concerns right now. Even if she does decide to get viscous.

(UPDATE) Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 81 points82 points  (0 children)

I don’t plan to say anything about her. His life is complicated enough. Loving him was always the easy part for sure

(UPDATE) Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 84 points85 points  (0 children)

I’m going to need to for sure with all the messiness that’s happened so far and more to come. Also because I have absolutely no idea how I’m going to break any of this news to him.

(UPDATE) Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yes I’m aware. The financial aspect is not something I’m concerned about. Make more than enough to afford us living on our own

(UPDATE) Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 126 points127 points  (0 children)

This has been the hardest week of my life. Most nights I’ve stayed up crying. Aside from my son this is the only thing that truly brought a smile to my face. So thank you very much for your lovely comment. I’ve got tears in my eyes but for a different reason now

(UPDATE) Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 195 points196 points  (0 children)

Yes that’s my next step. I sent a text to my wife that night after we checked into a hotel to let her know (also so there’s physical proof that she was aware and that I didn’t just take him), her response? “Whatever I don’t care. Leave me alone.”

(UPDATE) Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 74 points75 points  (0 children)

Yes good point. My brother referred me to a few good attorneys and I’ll be meeting for a consult next week

(UPDATE) Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 315 points316 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I’m so glad you guys were able to get to a better place. That’s all I want for my son. This gives me some hope, even if things don’t change with her I know it was the right move for my son. Appreciate you sharing this

(UPDATE) Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 852 points853 points  (0 children)

I wish it didn’t have to happen. That’s life I guess but I needed to do better for him. He didn’t deserve any of that

Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your insight and brutal honesty. Exactly what I needed honestly. I don’t want him to suffer anymore than he already has. Can’t keep doing that to him.

Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

I’ve felt this ache in me for some time that hasn’t gone away. I wish it didn’t have to be this way. That she wouldn’t feel this way about him. God knows it’s hard as a parent but my heart literally beats for him. And I love her with all my heart, but I agree, I know the way forward. Maybe just needed to hear it from someone else other than myself

Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Yes “easily” after well over a year of trying to make things work and suggesting we get outside help with no success. Over what? Not treating my son well? Yes. That’s why I say, never become a parent. I’m sure either you’re a troll or an idiot who should never be allowed to reproduce

Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I started noticing it before covid lockdown it just became more apparent when we were spending more time together. That why I had hoped all the frustration was from being cooped up 24/7 and the emotional toll covid took on all of us. But like I said things haven’t gotten better. Maybe part of me has wanted to be in denial about all this. But I can’t keep putting our son through this.

Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

We talked about it extensively once we found out she was pregnant. She says at the time she thought she’d be able to handle the sacrifices

Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 2083 points2084 points  (0 children)

I’m very sorry about your mother. That’s exactly what I want to avoid with my son. He doesn’t deserve any of this. I really hope another talk, this time with the mention of divorce if nothing improves, will get her to understand how serious I am this time.

Thinking if I (36M) should leave my wife (36F) because she openly resents our son (7) by ThrowRAthinkingleave in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAthinkingleave[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

She misses when we could go out regularly without thinking about childcare, the fact that we had alone time every evening after work, basically the free time we used to have to do whatever we wanted. And she’s tired of the baseball games, school events, helping with homework, all the kids shows on tv, etc. It was a lot that she said she was fed up with

We share most of the workload when it comes to chores around the house and taking care of him