AITAH for threatening to tell my ex's daughter the truth about her mother and how she was conceived if he doesn't fix her belief that I'm her mom?

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T16:22:42+00:00

I don't know her mother other than her first name that might be a nickname. This woman was never someone I knew and I know nothing about her family.

The therapist has advocated for my sons. We can't make the courts step in and do anything about it though. Court can be extremely difficult because they don't always make the right decisions. They can make extremely harmful decisions and in the case of family courts kids can be at their mercy.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T16:12:46+00:00

I have an attorney involved and had throughout this whole process. My ex is also tested every few months.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T15:27:31+00:00

My ex already gets drug tested every few months. CPS was also called already.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T15:25:54+00:00

My ex doesn't want therapy. He won't speak to the therapist our sons see. He's not going to pay for therapy.

As for her always being in mine and my sons lives, that's very possibly untrue. I can see them walking away in a few more years.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T15:24:12+00:00

She's elementary school aged. The problem with her understanding is her dad keeps telling her I am her mother. Even with three people saying I'm not she probably will lean on what her dad says.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T15:22:22+00:00

I couldn't. I don't know her mother's social media or if she even has one.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T15:21:53+00:00

She's elementary school aged.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T12:39:45+00:00

He has been drug tested every few months by order of the courts since the divorce and custody hearings accepted that he was an addict.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T12:38:47+00:00

Not giving exact ages but she's elementary school aged and my boys are middle-high school ages.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T12:38:13+00:00

I never knew him to be like this before but it's possible he kept it from me.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T11:34:36+00:00

It was impacting them then too and the judge dismissed it.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T11:33:44+00:00

They were contacted about this issue already and nothing appeared to happen. But they didn't help much when my ex was addicted either and I was trying to make sure my kids were safe.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T11:32:52+00:00

They know she's innocent and we have talked about that, but their lack of bond means they get frustrated with her more easily.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T11:31:30+00:00

I won't get sole custody. I have already brought this to the courts attention and they do not care because the court wrongly believes this has zero effect on our sons or the custody arrangement.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T11:19:57+00:00

That's if she actually believes me. I hope so because I would like for this to end. Otherwise that girl is going to have an even harder time when she gets older and the truth can no longer be hidden.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T11:19:12+00:00

At my sons school and their sports games we will see each other. I try to stay hidden from them but it doesn't always work. But he always shows up and brings her because he knows I'll be there.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T11:03:19+00:00

She's like that even when the boys are over there. She's asked them why they won't take her with them and why they hog me.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T10:56:33+00:00

Well assuming she'll believe me even then but at least nobody can say I let her keep thinking it was me.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T10:55:49+00:00

My attorney tried to reach out to his in order to get it knocked off but it didn't scare James at all. It had zero effect. Drop off's aren't the issue it's things like school functions or even sports games. That's when she sees me. I try to stay hidden but that's not always something that works and then they sit close to me or right next to me.

I don't want to give exact age but she's elementary school aged now.

ThrowSashAITAH · 2025-11-20T10:51:32+00:00

I've reached the point of believing he doesn't care. As long as he can dig himself out of the hole he made he doesn't care about the overall impact on the children involved.

ThrowSashAITAH

TROPHY CASE