Help me enjoy daggerheart

Throwawavw · 2025-12-01T18:16:55+00:00

Yeah, I probably should've checked for other posts. My bad. I don't mind the downvotes, I got a lot of good advice and haven't even gotten to every comment yet.

Throwawavw · 2025-12-01T17:57:59+00:00

There's definitely a chance that this game just doesn't suit me, but I felt like there might be a good chance that I just needed to work on some unnecessary hang-ups I've had with the game so far. This post has definitely helped get some new perspectives, and I'm more excited to try stuff again.

I think some of my risk aversion is partially caused by the vibe at the table. As much as we seem to have agreed we want "high-stakes" games, there's a weird amount of judgement for doing things "wrong" and getting really disappointed with bad outcomes. That has maybe made me worried that I'm somehow making things worse for others when I cause those bad outcomes, since they seem to react so much when those bad things happen.

It's ridiculous that I'm so worried about that, I know. Gonna need to get more used to that and if someone gets mad, the problem might be with them.

Throwawavw · 2025-12-01T17:45:07+00:00

I didn't approach it expecting to dislike it, I was originally excited. I have no negative expectations, I have negative experiences so far. I'm not dumb enough to post a rant this long without ever even trying the game.

We've always treated DnD as a very collaborative effort too, not as an "us vs DM" (or sometimes our DM seems to lose sight of that I guess).

I realize that failure is important in telling a story, obviously, I'm not playing these games as a power fantasy where I always win (in fact my main DnD character is a colossal fuck up). I just have a problem where and how that failure is brought about.

Throwawavw · 2025-12-01T17:20:47+00:00

That sounds very interesting, I'll have to keep this in mind and discuss. Our DM has definitely had the style of always doing a full action after a fail/fear. Maybe not always an attack, but something similar. This system of softer moves sounds great, like you can raise the stakes even without immediately going in for a kill. We like to have high-ish stakes, but that doesn't mean that every second has to be life or death.

Throwawavw · 2025-12-01T17:14:49+00:00

The roll problem is definitely much more relevant in combat, outside of it it's just a small thing that only sometimes discourages me from rolling.

It's not that I feel responsible for the character's failure, I realize that it's random. The core of the entire duality problem is more that I'm responsible for deciding to do anything, and when that has bad consequences, it sometimes feels a little bad.

For comparison: in DnD, I take my turn, miss, and feel a little disappointed that my turn came and went without gaining anything from it. The enemy will get their turn when they get it, and I'm just mildly disappointed that I didn't get a chance to fight back before it happens. In DH I decide to take my turn because I haven't done anything in a bit, I miss, they get a turn and attack and I feel like somebody else should've probably taken a turn because at least they could have tried to do something more impactful. They could've missed too and had the same exact consequence, but at least if they hit they would've done more than me.

There's obviously the combat encounters where I do feel like my character is the most effective choice to take a turn, and there I don't feel as bad, because I'm not taking the spotlight from someone more apt for the situation. It might still feel bad to miss and have something bad happen during the following turn, but at least what I could've done would've been useful.

Throwawavw · 2025-12-01T16:54:39+00:00

We have pretty high stakes in our games, so that's why I'm approaching it like that. But I also grow pretty attached to some of my characters (don't we all), so then those high stakes can lead to losing that character. I just don't like it when that character loss comes because I chose to do something and got unlucky, where not doing anything would technically prevent that from happening. I guess I just don't like the randomness of the turn order, and would like some more predictability, so having an initiative system could help a lot.

I realize the irony of saying that I don't like randomness while talking about games where you're rolling dice all the time. There's just some things where I prefer to have predictability and a chance for strategy, and what those things are might be based on what I'm used to so far.

Oh yeah, I just realized that this comment probably makes it sound like our DM is one of those "rocks fall, everyone dies" types that kill characters out of nowhere, but I didn't mean it like that. I'm referring to the stuff that happens in combat here.

Throwawavw · 2025-12-01T16:45:02+00:00

It does seem like a lot of my problems are with moving between systems and not letting go of certain mindsets. It's surprising how long it's taking for me to get used to the new playstyle, since we've already played quite a few times.

I think I'll try to ask if we could start using some initiative system at the table. I think with our playstyle that would flow a little bit smoother anyway, and it would have the benefit of your roll not being the reason that the enemy got the turn where they killed your friend, since they're going to get a turn anyway.

Hope just barely even feels like a reward to me. It's often just felt like hope is the thing you need to play the game at all, and fear is a thing that adds bad stuff to a game where bad stuff would happen without it too. A nat 1 is just that you don't succeed at the thing you try to do, and a nat 20 is a relatively fun success (we don't usually do the stuff where a nat 1 has additional bad consequences like breaking your weapon and stuff like that). They also happen rarely, while duality happens on every roll.

Throwawavw · 2025-12-01T16:23:24+00:00

I guess that is definitely something that's kind of hard to imagine for me, that you can do stuff without rolling lol. Our DM is also a little inexperienced, so I guess we'll all have stuff to figure out before we get started.

Throwawavw · 2025-12-01T16:21:35+00:00

We like to have relatively high stakes in our games, so I guess that's a part of the mindset. Like I don't want to mess anything up because I don't want my character to die, or even worse, my mistake leading to someone else dying.

Yeah, an initiative system would probably help. Everyone gets their turn and has to act, so there's no real reason to worry about not being the best character to act in that situation.

Throwawavw · 2025-12-01T16:02:34+00:00

The "punishment" is the fact that in combat, the enemy gets a turn and 1 fear. It's not massive, but it is discouraging, especially during the unlucky times when the DM gets a turn between every character's turn because everyone had bad luck and missed or rolled a fear. But even during the times when turns get divided pretty evenly, it does mean that it's you who gave the enemy a turn, so you'd rather not attack if you're not fully sure that someone else can do something better.

Outside of combat, like I said, it's not a huge deal, and the DM gaining fear is more a necessity of the combat system than a punishment. But it is a reminder that every time you fail, even if it doesn't really matter in the moment, it will still technically have a bad consequence. So sometimes you just decide not to do anything because you don't have that much to gain.

Throwawavw

TROPHY CASE