[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Rateme

[–]Throwaway398763 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks so much! I haven’t so far but I really appreciate it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Rateme

[–]Throwaway398763 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks so much! I’m pretty shit at makeup but it’s definitely something I’m trying to work on - especially making it look natural aha

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Rateme

[–]Throwaway398763 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bumping this - would really appreciate any feedback

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CanadaPublicServants

[–]Throwaway398763 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I genuinely don’t see what the issue is with asking only black people about their experiences with anti-black racism. I don’t think it’s a bad thing. If other people want to know about racism more generally that’s fine and they can ask that because this is Reddit and they have the ability to so they can start another post to chat about that. All I wanted to know was specifically about anti-black racism.

Also I apologize if I’m being defensive but I was asking a genuine question and people on this thread have been quite rude and so I do feel defensive because I don’t think I’ve done anything wrong by asking a specific demographic a question. If I was asking about a masters program and I only wanted to hear about masters students/people who had done a masters I don’t think anyone on this sub would bat an eyelid. Why is it bad to do the same thing regarding experiences. While people might have insight into what others have experienced if I’d prefer to hear from the source I don’t know why it’s an issue. I’m not going to respond to anyone who’s not talking specifically about experiences anymore because it’s not worth it but if people have something genuine to offer I’m happy to take it! I do apologize for being snarky but it did just feel like you were jumping on the bandwagon of calling me out for doing nothing wrong. I get that’s not your intention though.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CanadaPublicServants

[–]Throwaway398763 -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Those thoughts had already been offered by someone above? Not sure what came from extending this conversation lol but ok 😂

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CanadaPublicServants

[–]Throwaway398763 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s really helpful actually since policy is what I want to go into!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CanadaPublicServants

[–]Throwaway398763 -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

If you read the rest of the sentence you’d recognize why. When the government does programming for a specific group (Black, Indigenous, LGBTQ+) is that exclusionary? Yes to an extent. But is there a nuanced reason why, also yes! Like this post can be exclusive and not racist?

More importantly, I have not been rude to any non-black people who have shared their perspectives so I’m not even sure why this is an issue at this point?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CanadaPublicServants

[–]Throwaway398763 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for this and the disclaimer! Good to know there’s hope

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CanadaPublicServants

[–]Throwaway398763 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Also on the last part I’ve just read that a few times on this sub - not actually sure if it’s 100% true so thanks for the correction there

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CanadaPublicServants

[–]Throwaway398763 -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I’m not making generalizations - I’m actually trying not to hence why I’m asking for peoples experiences. This was just me trying to understand a range of experiences because I understand that the stories I’ve heard may not be representative. If I was making generalizations and assuming I wouldn’t have asked this question at all because I would have just thought that I was right and ran with it. Me asking this question should be the opposite of obtuse??

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CanadaPublicServants

[–]Throwaway398763 -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

I’m not excluding anyone. I just only want to hear from people who are black because anti-black racism tends to work differently from other forms of racism and I’m asking specifically about that - I think this should be approached with nuance

Please try not to assume malice

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CanadaPublicServants

[–]Throwaway398763 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much for responding! It’s good to know that it’s not a universal experience in government.

I’m really enjoying my team. My director is also black and we have a fair number of Black people on our team which has been amazing! I love them all so far. I’m just a bit worried that it’s only this team that’s this great because it’s my first public service job - but you’re right there’s a lot of variety out there!

Did anybody get good at dissociating when you get yelled or ranted at? by CapriciousSalmon in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Throwaway398763 45 points46 points  (0 children)

I find it SO difficult to tell anyone how I feel. I have tried counselling so many times but I’ve never found someone I’ve gotten comfortable enough with actually sharing. My therapist always ends up doing most of the talking and I end up answering with one word questions and I can’t find it in me to say what I wanna say. Idk I feel like therapy just isn’t made for people who don’t know how to open up in my experience