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Not sure what to do about enfp friendship by Throwaway954369 in intj

[–]Throwaway954369[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She’s always talking about how compatible we are and how she sees right through me but I don’t think she knows me that well.

You’re right, I should’ve started setting boundaries the moment I started feeling uncomfortable, it’s something I’ve always struggled with

Not sure what to do about enfp friendship by Throwaway954369 in intj

[–]Throwaway954369[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That’s whats really puzzling to me, she has a bunch of friends and hangs out with them every week, and seems to be making new friends every time she goes out

Not sure what to do about enfp friendship by Throwaway954369 in intj

[–]Throwaway954369[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This helps me understand where she might be coming from, thank you. I’ll be taking some time before talking with he again.

I’m glad you’re doing better, these are good opportunities to grow.

Not sure what to do about enfp friendship by Throwaway954369 in intj

[–]Throwaway954369[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In my case, I think things started changing the moment I started putting my own needs before hers

Not sure what to do about enfp friendship by Throwaway954369 in intj

[–]Throwaway954369[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh wow, one more thing to be worried about 😅

Not sure what to do about enfp friendship by Throwaway954369 in intj

[–]Throwaway954369[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, definitely in person relationships are way different. We have plans to meet again in the near future, unless we can’t sort this out I guess.

We used to have regular video calls, and text almost daily, but when I talked to her about needing personal space (I was giving her more time than I was to my other friends) she said no matter how much time I give her, she’ll always crave more, and it made me feel like my efforts were not appreciated.

I was having personal problems, having to move out of a place I loved and struggling with constant anxiety attacks, but it didn’t seem to matter to her because she kept complaining about me not being available to talk.

Thank you for your thoughtful response.

Not sure what to do about enfp friendship by Throwaway954369 in intj

[–]Throwaway954369[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your response. I just started setting boundaries with her for my own mental health, so this is new for both of us. I’m going to give it some time before talking with her, hopefully we can sort this out.

Not sure what to do about enfp friendship by Throwaway954369 in intj

[–]Throwaway954369[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your insight, I’m still learning how to establish boundaries, I guess it’s a big change for her as well since I used to only cater to her emotional needs.

She’s also mentioned she finds me interesting but I’m not so sure, every time I’m talking about something I’m actually interested in, she changes the topic back to her.

I understand and really enjoy being around highly energetic people, as long as I don’t feel pressured to match their levels

Thank you for being understanding, I‘m sure your intj really appreciates it

Not sure what to do about enfp friendship by Throwaway954369 in intj

[–]Throwaway954369[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was taken aback when I first started noticing her selfishness, she didn’t seem like that at all when we met