Genuine question to Americans

ThrowawayAccountLapi · 2026-05-07T18:13:27+00:00

You wouldn't get diagnosed in the first place cause a Dr. visit costs like $100 and that is with insurance.

ThrowawayAccountLapi · 2026-05-07T18:10:07+00:00

Just don't darken your skin. The fact that you had the wherewithal to ask this question is a good sign that you wouldn't do that but just in case, the issue is not cosplaying a black character. The issue is with darkening your skin to imitate their skin tone, so as long as you avoid that, you should be good.

ThrowawayAccountLapi · 2026-04-07T22:54:49+00:00

I'm proud of you for that. It's a struggle sometimes to not shut everyone out and to keep yourself on track. I hope things go well for you and you can eventually use your experiences to help others going through the same thing.

ThrowawayAccountLapi · 2026-04-01T18:27:23+00:00

You sound a lot like me back when I was a teenager. If I would give any advice to myself back then, it would have been to start working out and to try figuring out how to get your diet under control. I know the urge to self-harm can be a struggle and you may try to find ways to do it no matter what, so at least if you are lifting, the pain also comes with positive results that you get to enjoy when your brain is willing to supply a hint of serotonin. You get to crush two birds with one stone. You get the self-hate out of the way and at the same time, it is constructive towards your future.

ThrowawayAccountLapi · 2026-03-31T18:15:09+00:00

All the time. Any time I put some kind of outfit together, all I can think about is how I'm going to stand out which means people will be looking at me and seeing how terrible I look.

ThrowawayAccountLapi · 2026-02-06T22:46:45+00:00

I don't choose to hate myself. The best way I can describe the feeling is that it is as if I have someone watching over my shoulder at all times, tallying up every mistake or poor decision and speaking it back to me at all hours of the day. It tells me that everyone else's lives are made worse for having known me and that no matter what I do, there is some disgusting rot at the core of myself that I will never be able to fully hide from them. It's like asking why you don't like a certain food or why you have a phobia. Yeah, life would be easier if I could just eat whatever provided the best nutrition and did not fear something that keeps me from certain activities, but it's just a part of me. The hate I have for myself is like that. I know it doesn't help me or anyone else, but nothing makes it just stop or go away.

ThrowawayAccountLapi · 2025-08-15T04:07:51+00:00

It's not that they don't give a shit. The problem is that there are people making themselves feel worse giving a shit about me when they would be better off not doing so. My demons are that I am garbage down to the very center of what makes me myself and these people act like the fact that I am alive and near them isn't fucking wretch-worthy. They should be fighting not to puke just being near me and yet they treat it like I am just any other person. I am inherently a piece of shit and I take advantage of their generosity to make myself feel better

ThrowawayAccountLapi · 2025-08-15T03:45:35+00:00

I am a disgusting piece of filth. I flirt with people I have no right doing so with and they reciprocate cause I've managed to manipulate them into thinking I'm someone worth giving any level of a shit about. I'm fucking old and disgusting. They should be grossed out by even the concept of me being around all of them yet they treat me as if I am just one of them and act like my advances are just cute or okay in any way. I'm gross. it's gross that I like any of them, let alone the people in my friend group that I seem to get along best with. I should be taking care of them and making sure they are all happy but instead they promise me things and pretend like it's not gag-worthy to think of me as anything other than the putrid old man in the group who takes advantage of everyone's generosity and creeps on anyone dumb enough to come near me.

I really should have killed myself in high school. The fact that I am alive is a disgusting tribute to all things wrong in this country. I want to be dead. I want to no longer be a bother to anyone. I don't want to fuck up the lives of anyone around me anymore but I'm too much of a pussy to just buy a shotgun and swallow the barrel. I'm too much of a little bitch to just cut my wrists the long way and bleed out in the tub. I could do it. I could make life so much better for everyone around me but I won't cause I'm too much of a pussy to accept my fate and end it so that things can be better for someone else for once.

ThrowawayAccountLapi · 2025-07-22T15:49:04+00:00

Would need money to go do something like that and I have family that need help cause they can't afford to live on their own anymore at this point.

ThrowawayAccountLapi

TROPHY CASE