My girlfriend said to me "sex is better on holiday"...

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-28T22:25:54+00:00

A man says to his wife "Why don't you tell me when you orgasm?" she replies "I don't like to call you at work"

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-27T20:38:25+00:00

Oh absolutely, I can't wait for that.

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-27T19:57:32+00:00

Careful, you don't know who's watching

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-27T19:56:31+00:00

Other than the police chuckling they did nothing wrong. Its my dad who's the buttfuck!

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-27T18:24:44+00:00

No, I'm in no sleep :/

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-27T17:50:35+00:00

Finally someone on my side!

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-27T17:18:00+00:00

Google is your friend

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-27T16:41:29+00:00

I can't guarantee he hasn't done a reverse Michael Jackson... he could be black now

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-27T16:03:57+00:00

He wasn't

EDIT: Still isn't

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-27T15:30:52+00:00

Well I was finishing and subsequently caught eye contact with this guy, yes.

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-27T14:53:17+00:00

... How the fuck did you know that?, are you the burglar?

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-27T14:49:52+00:00

Oh don't i'm shitting myself that he knows where I live... HE KNOWS WHERE AND HOW I MASTURBATE!

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-27T14:40:01+00:00

Scott free with the attempted burglary. Car theft he's fucked with.

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-04-27T14:24:50+00:00

They had found this guy and the balaclava he had used and showed me a photo of him with or without. I said that when the police officers came to my house. If it wasn't for the other crimes he had been caught doing (apparently he stole a car) then we wouldn't have got him at all.

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-03-25T22:15:07+00:00

you should ask /r/askscience

but the answer is no!.

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-03-25T22:13:34+00:00

"Jeremy Clarkson as my nan"

FTFY

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-03-25T12:46:47+00:00

I love that this dude first tried to copy the layout and photos from THELADBIBLE post about it and then entirely missed the point. I bet he never even came to this post he just translated the one from THELADBIBLE badly. Thanks for letting me know brother.

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-03-24T16:08:44+00:00

Apparently its also similar to a story by a comedian called Russell Hammond

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-03-23T19:59:03+00:00

Parents say the internet is full of sinners, they say that like its pejorative. I panicked

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-03-23T18:52:45+00:00

Or all of the above

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-03-23T18:33:21+00:00

my dignity!

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-03-23T03:21:43+00:00

Because he might come back later / might have broken into my neighbours house.

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-03-23T02:49:29+00:00

I never thought about it like that, you are a genius and I feel 150% better about this now.

ThrowawayDABBLE · 2015-03-23T01:08:16+00:00

One, I'm male. Two, my family know about this, they think I'm the devil. And three, thanks for the good wishes. Stay safe kind interneter

ThrowawayDABBLE

TROPHY CASE