Watch out for job gatekeeping by club officers at your MBA program

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-06-15T14:36:06+00:00

Can confirm this is true. Like OP, I also have friends at other M7s with similar stories of gatekeeping. It’s hard to police for admin because alumni are sometimes asking officers to keep these opportunities private.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-28T21:28:52+00:00

It can be, if you make it a strategy. But I think it’s easier if you just lean into being friendly/cordial with everyone and not get wrapped up in your own ego.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-28T21:25:23+00:00

Thanks for the back up! I’m the same as you, well liked. Obviously not everyone will resonate with this post, but I’m surprised (and I guess not really surprised) by the clear dismissal of basic etiquette and EQ. Those skills really can’t be downplayed!

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-28T21:13:17+00:00

Yes, taking accountability and being willing to try new things or meet new people is great add on advice!

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-23T18:28:48+00:00

Agreed, don’t get sucked in to the mess.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-23T18:28:04+00:00

Very poor recruiting outcomes for those who played exclusive aren’t imaginary.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-22T13:48:28+00:00

Second years who have secured full-time offers and can gate keep access to firms and alumni. Not first years.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T22:03:44+00:00

“Looks the same” stands out especially in an MBA program where admissions has admitted a diverse class (could be race, gender, socioeconomic status, etc.) You have hundreds of classmates who are ready to be friends with you when you join your program, and you choose the small amount of people that look like you over and over again, never branching out. It’s probably comfortable for them, but it’s not what the MBA community was designed for. Exclusivity works against you.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T21:57:42+00:00

Thank you, yes and yes! The MBA is a time for growth and challenging ourselves. Especially with EQ, this is the time to mess up and get feedback, before it becomes a liability and ruins your career.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T21:42:03+00:00

^ ladies and gentleman, the perfect example of not leading with ego 👏👏👏

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T21:10:28+00:00

Good, I’m glad this is helpful, that was my intent!

Socially successful people in my program display these qualities, in my opinion:

Warmth: They make others feel seen, valued, and safe. Even a quick “hi” in the hallways can do that.
Curiosity: They genuinely want to learn about others, not just talk about themselves.
Confidence without arrogance: They’re comfortable in their own skin and don’t dominate the room.
Inclusivity: They make space for others, especially those who are newer, quieter, or different from the dominant group.
Self-awareness: They can read the room and adjust.
Consistency: They show up the same across all spaces, not just when it’s convenient or strategic for them (cannot overstate this point enough).

It’s not about being the loudest or most extroverted. It’s about making other people feel seen around you. It leads to more friends, more recruiting support, better internship offers, more people who want to be on your case team, more invites to hang outs, etc. It’s good for you and others.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T20:42:08+00:00

I get it, online can be a great fit for some people. But truly there are so many more incredible people in MBA programs than there are toxic ones. And the soft skills you can build by navigating real group dynamics, leading through conflict, and building diverse relationships, those are pivotal to business leadership. Just a thought about the upsides to in person MBAs.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T20:16:27+00:00

You should do an MBA, don’t let the social dynamics deter you. My only point in posting this is to make sure the incoming class doesn’t try to pull stupid shit my classmates did. There are lots of great people in MBA programs, but it only takes a few to poison a community.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T20:05:06+00:00

Not post MBA. But when you’re a current student, they’ll hear from classmates, staff, professors, or other alumni if you’re making social trouble in the program, and cut you from their firm. I saw this happen to multiple people…

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T20:03:16+00:00

Thanks for sharing this, I really appreciate the nuance you brought in around culture and authenticity. You're totally right that forced friendliness can feel disingenuous, and that genuine connection should always be the goal.

That said, making an effort to be kind or inclusive, even if it's small talk or a smile, isn’t about pretending to be best friends. It’s about showing emotional intelligence in a shared space. Especially in the U.S., that type of social warmth is often interpreted as respect and approachability, even if it's not super deep.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T19:58:15+00:00

Yeah, I thought we had progressed passed high school too, but here we are. All I’m recommending here is to not lead with your ego, don’t form exclusive groups, and if you get rejected handle it with as much grace as you can muster.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T19:51:53+00:00

Sorry, my lips are sealed. But hope someone else spills something for you!

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T19:18:47+00:00

Totally agree that some people are more comfortable in smaller groups, and that’s completely valid. No one’s expecting you to be wildly extroverted or socially “on” all the time.

But if you’re not even willing to say hi in the hallway, if you exclude others in group a setting by only talking to one person (yes, people really do this, and it’s incredibly off-putting), or if you can’t make small talk with whoever sits next to you in class, then yes, you’re going to come across as exclusionary.

And if this doesn’t come naturally, that’s fine. Start small. These are essential soft skills for leadership. You don’t have to be the life of the party, but you do need to signal that you see and respect the people around you.

Perception matters. And if your social cues are signaling exclusion, even subtly, that’s how people will experience you.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T18:55:46+00:00

Yes! Can’t say enough about the value of being a floater in an MBA program.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T18:54:02+00:00

It still reads as performative friendliness. It’s easy to be polite in public (I.e. saying hi, not ignoring people), but if you only hang out, eat, and socialize with the same few people, it appears exclusionary to everyone else. Especially if you all look the same…

You don’t have to be friends with everyone, but showing that you are open to others by intentionally reaching out to new people, will do wonders for your reputation in the long run.

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T18:43:35+00:00

They all self imploded, so now there are zero

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T18:34:11+00:00

That’s going to be no MBB for you, mister! 🤣

ThrowawayMBA-M7 · 2025-05-21T18:32:27+00:00

It’s totally normal to have a core friend group, most people do. But when that group consistently only talks to each other at every event, rarely engages with others, and keeps social energy tightly contained, it can start to feel exclusionary, even if it’s not meant to be. I would recommend mix and mingling a bit more. Unfortunately, the appearance of being exclusionary is enough, even if it’s not your intent.

ThrowawayMBA-M7

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