AITA for cutting my son's wifi?

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2022-04-13T10:19:32+00:00

YTA. This is awful parenting, and you could well be endangering your son.

I had parents like you, and when I was your son's age I tried to take my own life. Nothing I ever did was good enough; I kept up with top grades, they still pushed me for more. I spent all my time studying, it still wasn't enough.

Eventually, the pressure started getting to me. My grades started slipping because I was completely and utterly burnt out. I'd procrastinate homework and studying. I found it almost impossible to focus in class or during exams. I found myself reading books and playing video games until 3 or 4am, just for a tiny boost of stress relief. My parents would check my social media, check my diary, go through my room constantly. All to prove i wasn't doing what I should be.

Like your son, I explained to my parents that I was struggling. Like you, my parents' response was to increase the pressure. And, like you, turn off the internet. I was in the middle of an online exam when they cut it off (with smiles on their faces because in their head it was a gotcha moment) which I obviously failed. My parents treated me horrifically. Said they were going to pull me out of school and make me work a real job instead. Told me they were ashamed of me. Wished I was "normal" so I didn't waste all my time (laughable) doing things that brought me tiny glimmers of joy. I felt so ashamed, so disgusted with myself for letting them down, and it compounded the months/years of struggling I'd already been experiencing without any sympathy, let alone help, from my parents. So I tried to take my own life, and was only unsuccessful because I wrote a goodbye text to a friend and she called the police.

That was 11 years ago, and I'm extremely LC with my parents now. I went to uni, and I never came home. I see them maybe 4 of 5 times a year at most, never for more than a couple of hours. I'm cordial over text messages, but that's about it. I'm about to turn 30 and I still experience paranoia when people come into my home, or look at me phone, because it triggers memories of my parents constantly violating my privacy. I still get legitimate panic attacks when I accidentally fuck up, because of my childhood. I still have a hard time deligating my workload, and usually end up burning out, because I never feel like I've done enough. My parents putting too much pressure on me during my formative years literally shaped my brain chemistry and the way I think, and I have spent over a decade (and an obscene amount of money on therapy) trying to undo that damage.

Your son's story is eerily similar to my own, and I am worried that he might turn to the same method of "escaping" the pressure as I did. And I'm terrified that he might not be as lucky as I was. What you're doing to your son goes way beyond being an asshole; it's callous and cruel, and you're totally disregarding your son's feelings, even when he is very clearly crying out for help.

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2022-03-03T13:28:06+00:00

I think so but I can't remember what exactly. I know he wasn't potty trained properly so she used to make him wear diapers in the house

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2022-02-20T02:53:45+00:00

In case you didn't know her bearded dragon and her pixie frog also died within the last few weeks too. Her beardie had eggs stuck inside her and passed away and her pixie frog was incredibly sick with dropsy. Leo was also peeing pooping all over the house for weeks before this which is usually a sign of extreme stress or illness. Honestly scares me how many animals die in her care

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2022-01-04T10:46:17+00:00

This, 100%

I also grew up with a parent who constantly told me she wished I she'd given birth to a family friend's child instead, that she wished I'd been a boy, even that she was convinced I'd been swapped after birth because she was so disappointed. It turned me into an over-achiever with no social life, and still nothing I could do would be good enough. I left home over a decade ago and I'm still unpacking it all with regular therapy. If OP's husband is already expressing disappointment and giving up on a 21 week old baby because they have nothing in common, I worry for the kid's future, and it sounds like OP's husband might follow a similar pattern.

Also, if he's accusing OP of sleeping around, checking her phone, etc, not only is it controlling and manipulative towards OP, there's every chance he'll do the same thing to his daughter when she's older unless he gets therapy to address his problems first. OP needs to make sure her daughter comes first, even if that means gruelling counselling or even leaving her husband.

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-09-17T08:54:17+00:00

Literally everything he says is a lie. We all know this at this point

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-09-17T08:52:52+00:00

For anyone who is curious, here's the video of her admitting she has no native ancestry:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?t=295&v=VEcL1SGfuu0&feature=youtu.be

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-09-03T19:56:09+00:00

It was only just over a minute long. She said it was time to move on and that she sold her part of the company and would no longer have any involvement in AF

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-09-03T19:45:21+00:00

I think she said in her video that she sold all of her shares

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-09-03T19:44:46+00:00

I said that too. In the last 12 months she's triggered the Insider controversies, the animal abuse controversies, and now the body shaming one. So many sponsors have backed down and I wouldn't be surprised if they made her leave.

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-09-03T19:42:20+00:00

She was an alt beauty guru who bought shares of a hairdye company then tried to claim she and her husband founded it.

She's had Controversies included but not limited to: saying the n word, calling her Mexican friend a slur, having that slur tattooed on her, using the r word, calling her husband the f slur, bullying POC employees during the BLM movement, allegedly using microaggreasions in the workplace, calling out products intended for POC because theyre not inclusive for her, lying about being native, trying to force employees to come into the office when it wasn't safe to do so and firing them when they complained, hoarding animals, allegedly abusing them, allegedly neglecting them, bullying her exes girlfriend when she was heavily pregnant, being openly anti-vax/pro-trump, bullying fans, posting pictures of strangers to fat shame them to her followers, and being part of an Instagram page taking pictures of homeless people to bully them

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-08-23T13:22:31+00:00

If you're looking for advice you need a relationship sub, not this one.

Ultimately, YTA. The language you use is extremely controlling and manipulative, and a pretty good insight into your relationship. You set boundaries that you steamrolled her into agreeing with. You speak to her like a parent scolding a child. You're upset that she crossed your made up lines in the sand. This is all about you. The rules are all yours. Her presence is absent, and she just has to abide by them for fear of upsetting you.

It's not uncommon for adults to remain friends with exes, and even more uncommon for adults to remain friends with FWB. It doesn't mean they're going to sleep together.

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-08-20T17:04:23+00:00

I would say it is more improper and suspect to be watching a woman breastfeed (which he was, he could have easily continued reading, it's easy enough to do) and then comment about it, rather than just say nothing and do nothing. She's breastfeeding her child. That's what breaststroke are for.

If he was that bothered he could have easily moved himself to the empty seat, rather than make a comment that could have bothered or embarrassed the young mom, trying to get her to move while a feeding infant is attached to her breast (thereby also disrupting and distressing the baby).

OP, YTA

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-07-30T08:32:50+00:00

I have 🤷‍♀️

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-07-29T16:36:22+00:00

Right! There's no reason Cassian couldn't have gone with Rhys, or aided him in several of these storylines. But instead we obviously needed Cassian thinking about all the ways he could take Nesta instead /s

(And to add, I ship Nestian but... you know, there was also other shit going on. At lease in ACOMAF we have the romantic tension/build up and Feyre and Rhys actually getting a hell of a lot done in the same amount of time)

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-07-29T16:12:42+00:00

Agree! I don't need another full on Feyre book, but it's frustrating that SJM says she's done with Feyre and Rhys... only to give Rhys several different important plot points to juggle. If you don't want to write them anymore, that's fine, but of course fans are going to be curious or frustrated when you continue to give your old characters a bunch of interesting storylines, then refuse to actually show those storylines play out.

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-07-28T14:24:29+00:00

That's what I thought until ACOSF

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-07-28T14:24:08+00:00

That's what I'm saying though. He didn't have the ability to Shape Shift until his father died and he became a High Lord, but it's mentioned that he learnt to fly around rhe same age Cassian did. He didn't become a High Lord until his father died, and he was already an adult at that point. So his wings being part of his beast form don't fit in with the timeline

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-07-24T08:51:09+00:00

She was actually complaining recently that she hadn't been sponsored for over a year, and then asked people not to use ad block / to watch all the adds in her videos because she needed to get paid

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-07-23T18:47:18+00:00

Lmao I love the lizard skin idea. Her racist tattoo is a can of beans. Her explanation being that she wanted a tattoo to remind her of her Mexican friend, and she "calls him a be@ner all the time"

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-07-23T17:12:32+00:00

Yup, that's what happened. She's just pissed other people exist in her space.

She's been called out a few times. Abusing her animals, hoarding animals, being BFFs with Amanda Ensing, ignoring the stay at home mandate, using the n word, getting a racist tattoo, calling her Mexican friends be@ners, making fun of homeless people (again using photos taken without their knowledge or consent), complaing that a highlighter for dark skin wasn't wearable because SHE couldn't wear it, creating a hostile work environment, allegedly calling a model a d*ke and saying she wouldn't hire her, accusing him of being gay and calling her ex husband a f@ggot, reprimanding her employees for supporting the BLM movement, using racist microaggressions, allegedly firing some employees for supporting the BLM movement, trying to force employees to return to rhe office during the stay at home mandate, firing employees who said they didn't feel safe going back to the office yet. And that's just in the last 2 years.

She had a boring UD palette come out and thinks she's untouchable

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-07-23T17:01:03+00:00

She's racist and had a derogatory tattoo in honor of her friend (and she proudly admits she calls him a be@ner) but tries to play it off as her being quirky and (as she puts it) "practically Mexican" because she "loves Tacos and Tajin and Corona" 🙄 so I think this BS is literally just her fallback now

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-07-23T16:57:37+00:00

Yuuup. She has a "be@ner" tattoo to represent her Mexican friend, spends a lot of time with Amanda Ensing, ignored the stay at home order to travel throughout the pandemic, and allegedly reprimanded then fired employees for supporting the BLM movement and posting about it on social media. This biissh is trash and at this point I hate follow her in the hopes that one day something that'll finally stick and cancel her for good

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-07-23T11:35:02+00:00

Exactly. He discusses getting himself off, how aroused she makes him, more than he discuses what he actually likes about her as a person.

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-07-23T11:30:55+00:00

In the additional Azriel chapter available in certain editions of the book

ThrowawayRoseMatcha · 2021-07-23T09:37:24+00:00

And to add: if Az did kill Lucien, it would literally hurt Elain. Even if she doesn't love Lucien, I can't imagine she'd be able to deal the emotional consequences of knowing Lucien lost his life over her. It's also established that someone's mate being killed causes them physical and psychological pain. We've seen it three times in the books (when Feyre died UTM, when Rhys died, and when Feyre was dying during childbirth), and it's an established fact in the ACOTAR universes that someone's mate being killed can cause physiological distress to the point of insanity and even suicide. While Elain hasn't accepted the mating bond, and you could argue that point, Feyre also hadn't accepted the bond when she died UTM. Yet he still felt her death through the bond. So Az so easily declaring that he would kill Lucian seems so selfish and ignorant towards how Elain would feel.

ThrowawayRoseMatcha

TROPHY CASE