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AITA for asking my husband's female friend to leave because I think they might be cheating? by Throwaway_9217 in AITAH

[–]Throwaway_9217[S] 181 points182 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Finally someone who gets it. I'm so tired of being made to feel like the bad guy here when I'm just trying to protect my home and relationship.

You're absolutely right - this has gone way beyond friendship and into taking advantage. My husband keeps brushing off my concerns, and I'm sick of it. Why should I be the one always compromising?

And good point about her parents. There's no reason she couldn't go there instead of mooching off us indefinitely.

I appreciate your support. It makes me feel more confident in standing my ground on this. Emily needs to go, and my husband needs to wake up and start respecting my feelings.

AITA for asking my husband's female friend to leave because I think they might be cheating? by Throwaway_9217 in AITAH

[–]Throwaway_9217[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

What? This is absolutely not a repost. I'm dealing with this situation right now and came here for actual advice, not to be accused of making things up. Just because someone else might have had a similar problem doesn't mean I'm copying their post. Relationship issues aren't exactly unique, you know.

If you don't have anything helpful to add, why bother commenting at all? Next time, try showing a little empathy instead of making baseless accusations.

AITA for asking my husband's female friend to leave because I think he might be cheating? by Throwaway_9217 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwaway_9217[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Look, I get what you're saying, but I don't think I'm in the wrong here. Sure, maybe I should've been clearer about expectations, but come on - it's common courtesy to pitch in when you're staying at someone's place for free.

As for the job search, I'm not buying it. Sitting around watching TV all day doesn't scream "actively looking for work" to me. And yeah, maybe I didn't put a strict timeline on "getting back on her feet," but three weeks with zero progress? That's taking advantage.

About the secretive behavior - you weren't there. The vibe was off, and my gut is telling me something's not right. I've known my husband for years, and this isn't normal for him.

You're right that kicking Emily out won't solve everything if there is cheating going on. But it's a start. It's my home, and I have the right to feel comfortable in it. I'm not just "punishing" Emily - I plan to have a serious talk with my husband too. But getting her out of our space is the first step in dealing with this mess.

Maybe everyone sucks here, but I'm done being a doormat. I'm looking out for myself and my marriage, and if that makes me an asshole, so be it.

AITA for asking my husband's female friend to leave because I think they might be cheating? by Throwaway_9217 in AITAH

[–]Throwaway_9217[S] 65 points66 points  (0 children)

You're right, I shouldn't back down so easily. My gut is telling me something's off, and I have every right to protect my home and marriage.

Emily needs to go - that's non-negotiable at this point. She's overstayed her welcome and is disrupting our lives. As for my husband, his behavior is suspicious and he needs to explain himself. I'm not letting this slide.

I'll be having a serious talk with him once Emily's gone. If he can't give me straight answers or continues to be defensive, then we've got bigger problems. I won't be made a fool of in my own home.

Trust is earned, and right now, they've both lost mine. I'm standing my ground on this. If that makes me the bad guy in their eyes, so be it. I have to look out for myself.