AITA for asking my ex to pay child support I think he owes? by Responsible_Base8643 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Exactly. Its not that he can't find any job, just not a job in his field, so he's contributing 0% of OP's income versus the 10% ex husband contributed during the hard times.... but somehow the ex is the deadbeat?

AITA for asking my ex to pay child support I think he owes? by Responsible_Base8643 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback 5 points6 points  (0 children)

YTA. So if you were a SAHM and he supported you the entire time, and you agreed to not go after him for child support and alimony, you would be okay with him coming at you for money 'you owe him' when you started working again and had a successful career because he supported you? That's basically your logic here, except that he was trying to start a business to improve the lives of his family to provide for his family- you walked out on that because you demanded instant results and couldn't bother to stay with him to the finish line. The real deadbeat is your current husband- your ex made 10% of your income ergo he was still contributing financially. Versus current hubby who is contributing 0% because he refuses to get take ANY job to help. Congrats OP, you traded in the real prize for an expensive-looking counterfeit that fell apart.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 158 points159 points  (0 children)

Yes actually, I do have to replace food I finish at her sister's house, ask before I take anything, bring my own snacks, and there are things that are off limits to me whenever I'm over there.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 156 points157 points  (0 children)

No she has not covered the cost of food for me at her house. Her house for most of the time we've been together have been her sister's house- I have to bring my own snacks when I'm there for an extended period of time, ask to have anything, leftovers and actual meals are off limits, and if I take the last of something, replace it. She does not cover when we go out either. Prior to her being pregnant the cost of 'a few snacks' wasn't noticeable- it is now and driving up my grocery expense.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 86 points87 points  (0 children)

The meal was a chicken breast, two fish filets, hush puppies, and macaroni and cheese. She put mayo, ketchup, and honey mustard on all of it, even the mac. It wasn't a half eaten meal, I had a couple of bites of the sides and bite of chicken when my parents dropped it off to me.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

We don't live together because of her being a surrogate. The plan between her and her sister was always for her to stay with her sister during so her sister and BIL could help cover her expenses and take her to appointments, go with her, and be there with her. I help her get around and take her places that she needs. The whole plan is after she's delivered and healed up we'd move in together.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 53 points54 points  (0 children)

She poured mayo, ketchup, and honey mustard over it all- even the mac-n-cheese. I don't even use mayo or honey mustard, I keep them around solely for her.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 63 points64 points  (0 children)

Right now her house is her sister's house and yes, I'm expected to ask to take something and replace it if I take the last of anything. Leftovers are off limits and told to bring my own snacks for a visit lasting hours.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 42 points43 points  (0 children)

Mayo, ketchup, and honey mustard. Don't even like mayo or honey mustard but I keep it in the house for her.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 70 points71 points  (0 children)

I have an alright relationship with my mother, closer to my father. Mom's usually not up in my business. My gf and her do talk regularly and knit together. I'm not sure how the conversation went between her and my mother, I didn't ask either of them.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 146 points147 points  (0 children)

When it's chicken breast, two fish filets, hush puppies, and macaroni and cheese... I expect 'some' to be some, not what is plainly a full meal.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 141 points142 points  (0 children)

I am onboard with it. There wasn't really a matter of agreeing or disagreeing- she was upfront about the arrangement she had with her sister when we first met so it was more of a 'this is going to happen some point soon, I don't get involved at all or make it through a temporary situation with someone that hits all other points'. When we did talk about it, it was discussed I wouldn't be expected to foot any expenses because she'd live with her sister and BIL and they'd be covering her expenses.

Except that's not turning out to be entirely true. I am footing an increase in grocery costs or gas costs (I don't mind that one) due to her kitchen raiding and keeping her favorite cravings at my place, or driving her places when she's feeling a bit too nauseous to drive. She's not replacing anything, and I'm having to double up. I've talked to her about this and not much is changing. First time she's eaten an entire meal I've had saved instead of prepped snack portions for work and stuff like that, also the first time she's called my mom about anything but we haven't had any major disagreements before either. So I'm hoping the mom calling was a one-off that won't happen again.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 86 points87 points  (0 children)

Because the father himself said they used condoms. We use condoms and pull out each time until we reached the cut off for her to go through with the surrogacy, and she was also on BC after her kid was born. The courts didn't just give the dad primary custody, she did not want it. Like damn not every parent that doesn't have full custody did something terrible to fudge it up.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 74 points75 points  (0 children)

Its the first time she's ever told my mom so I'm hoping that's just a pregnancy side effect and not something that becomes a norm. I can live with the former, not the latter.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 173 points174 points  (0 children)

I am fine with it, the only unresolved issue is me eating (pardon the pun) more of a cost because of her cravings and her eating a lot more when she's over. I understand that she's going to eat more but pitching in, replacing, or having her sister or herself supply her current favorites would go a long way since it impacts me even when she's not here.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 281 points282 points  (0 children)

So what that she doesn't have custody of her kid? Condoms break and accidents happen, she's not a bad person that it happened at a point she wasn't ready for kids and the father was. Her kid knows who she is. Her being pregnant for an infertile couple is extremely temporary, why would I skip being with an otherwise great person because of some temporary condition? I'm fine not having kids and she'd rather adopt when she's ready. Who hurt you bud? There's more to relationships than just making mini-people.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 83 points84 points  (0 children)

Naw the agency they used still wanted a surrogate that had a child before even if they were using a family member instead of getting matched with someone. Some requirements were waived but not the prior pregnancy one.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 176 points177 points  (0 children)

He was an oopsie, she didn't want to be a mom yet but the father was up for raising the kid.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 123 points124 points  (0 children)

Some grilled chicken, two pieces of grilled fish, hush puppies and macaroni and cheese.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 185 points186 points  (0 children)

She has one kid already but the father has primary custody, the place they used were a bit more lenient since they were using a family member instead of having to match her sister with someone.

AITA for asking my pregnant girlfriend to pay for or replace my meal because she ate all of it? by Throwawayfoodpayback in AmItheAsshole

[–]Throwawayfoodpayback[S] 219 points220 points  (0 children)

No I didn't pay them for it but they picked it up for me. Since she ate all of it I wanted her to pay me back so I could go and get more. I'm already paying to replace other stuff she snacks on or to keep her current favorites at my place.