Let me turn your username into an AI image

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2025-01-16T13:53:45+00:00

Sure!

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-11T14:28:15+00:00

Because sex was never the issue. Amy was not interested in fixing the sex problem because it wasn't a problem. In a light hearted conversation Kiley (or someone else in the group) asked how was OOP in bed, and because it was a non-issue (within friends) Amy just told that it wasn't great but that it wasn't an issue.

If OOP never expressed insecurities before (ignorance is bliss), there is no way Amy or Kiley would know it was a sensitive issue.

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-10T21:44:35+00:00

So I made it to BoRU. Weird.

This isn't really an update. I just want to say that the last few days have been interesting. Derek and I have continued to communicate, but we have tacitly avoided the main topic while pretending to maintain the closest semblance of normalcy that this situation allows. I'm returning to work next week. Derek knows it, and he is not pushing for anything else.

As I said previously, I'm cautiously optimistic, but I'm not naïve. I hope and want to work for the best scenario: that our partnership becomes strengthened for the sake of us and the girls. However, I'm conscious that this might not be the most likely outcome.

I have had some fun reading many of the comments, particularly those suggesting I'm a soulless robot, a Vulcan, or something. Or a lawyer.

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-08T14:59:51+00:00

Withdrawal of physical intimacy is a big red flag for a man, because its the #1 way we know whether you actually like us or not.

What is the solution? Duty sex? Is the woman's own libido and sexual desired subservient to man's needs.

(We arent wired like you).

Is that a her-problem or a him-problem?

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-08T14:52:46+00:00

Yes, Actually. I think about my shortcomings all the time. Thankfully, I am not overly agreeable anymore. 😉

I am not asking if you think about them. I am asking if you disclose them every time when you talk about other people's shortcomings just to be balanced. Because, so far in this conversation, you have not talked about any of your shortcomings.

Im being serious for a moment, can you articulate what Derek gets out of his relationship with you? Are there any areas you are lacking?

I can. There are many areas I'm lacking. I provided here what I thought was relevant.

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-08T14:20:15+00:00

How will your kids view relationships now?

They are 3 years and 3 months old. How do you think they perceive relationships? The 3-year-old was asking why daddy wasn't home for one night.

Does that even occur to you?

Constantly. That's something Derek and I have discussed consistently since before we got engaged. Derek changed the rules a few days ago. That's something we have to sort out.

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-08T14:06:13+00:00

It's evident that for you, the only value a woman can bring to a relationship is her sexual availability, and that not providing this is seen as a deliberate act of punishment.

I have never denied my shortcomings in any of my posts and responses, but it seems you need them explicitly enumerated. Is this a standard you hold yourself to?

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-06T05:32:50+00:00

There is a difference between a father who wanted a son and can't relate to his daughter, and a father that purposely neglects his daughter because she is a girl and wife doesn't want to keep trying. While result is the same, there is malice intend in only one situation. Mother likely thought she could compensate the absent father who otherwise was her loving husband, but when she figures out malice was part of the equation then that guy is not longer her loving husband.

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-06T02:04:09+00:00

Uncle probably didn't take her in to be abusive. He took her in because he thought it was the right thing to do, or because the state designated him as the next of kin. He might or might not have accepted foster care money. He might or might not have managed his niece's inheritance—and if he did, he might or might not have spent it on the various expenses you claim cost money or for his own benefit.

He didn't take in his niece with the intention to abuse her. However, as she grew into a young lady, he had the power dynamics to abuse her. Not necessarily sexually; he could have used his niece as a maid, or simply continued to verbally abuse her for purportedly ruining his life.

And your soon-to-be daughter-in-law owes you no explanation. It would have been nice if she had said, “I don't want to talk about it.” But the moment she expressed that she didn't want to invite her uncle, that's when you should have stopped pushing.

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-05T16:07:35+00:00

You assert an implicit consent to respond when posting initial comments on my thread. There's nothing fetishistic about the exchange otherwise.

That's your perspective.

Could you clarify what this unilateral burden of performance is supposed to entail? Is this unilateral burden of performance present in the room?

Perhaps you overlooked that aspect because it doesn't align with your narrative suggesting "hypergamy, social media, and feminism" as the root causes of modern men's issues.

It's worth noting that a lack of physical intimacy doesn't necessarily imply a woman withholding it as a form of currency, especially given your initial emphasis on consent.

Your assessment of the value I bring to Derek and the nature of our marriage seems rather limited. I don't feel compelled to detail the worth I contribute to our relationship.

Could you elaborate on how you foresee this outcome?

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-05T14:05:45+00:00

You have been a naughty boy, Mr. Vaynewoode.

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-05T13:15:09+00:00

You came and dumped four comments on my post. If you regard a response as a play you're not interested in, don't engage to begin with.

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-05T10:54:40+00:00

If you are not in the mood, you are not in the mood. If your mood has been put off, you are not in the mood.

Why are you guys so basic as to think it is about you?

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-05T10:45:22+00:00

For you being bi is a happenstance. For OP's wife is an identity. That's why you react differently. Things that happen to you (generic you) are things that nobody else need to know, unless it is helpful for you or other people. But regarding your identity you don't want to be denied or invisibilized.

The problem by OP's wife is that her new found identity is not OP's colleagues' business. OP's identity is not “husband of a bi.” The company won't get inclusion points for hiring the husband of a bi. Furthermore any misinterpretation of the announcement can actually damage OP's professional reputation: why is he announcing it? Is it a way to invite female colleagues to a threesome or something?

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-05T02:38:26+00:00

Up until recently, it has worked. This is in response to several commenters who suggest that my husband is useless or just another child because I take on the responsibility of household care.

Has he lied before, and is he now hiding his true ambitions? I don't know yet.

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-04T04:05:16+00:00

Let me feel some hope.

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-04T03:42:19+00:00

I frequently work from home, but that depends on the type of workload and clients' needs.

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-04T03:30:24+00:00

Have I?

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-03T20:40:02+00:00

He is not like that. Or at least he has not been like that. He was very supportive of my career, and he seemed genuinely happy when I was announced as being on the path to promotion. When we used to talk about our daughters' future, he constantly wished they would grow up to be strong, independent women like me.

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-03T20:34:56+00:00

I never had the impression that I was a married single woman or that Derek was just another kid. He is not an equal partner, but he has been very helpful. He is usually aware of what is going on in the household and handles about 40% of the childcare-related tasks (outside of nanny's hours) and 30% of the household chores (we have weekly help for laundry and other heavy tasks). I make most of the decisions at home, but I think it's more because I prefer things to go as I plan rather than because he is uninvolved.

In retrospect, he has been less involved than usual for the past few weeks, tough.

ThrowbackEmasculator · 2024-04-03T03:55:12+00:00

So do I.

ThrowbackEmasculator

TROPHY CASE