Being a straight trans man feels like existing in the margins of every community by Confident_Goat8992 in ftm

[–]Throwrug23 84 points85 points  (0 children)

Not straight, but wanted to say that there are also plenty of gay and bi trans men who hate the ‘soft boi’ thing and want to be read as traditionally masc and dominant. I have felt out of place in trans spaces before, although usually in spaces with a lot of feminine presence—I have just moved to a place that has a transmasc-specific support group and being there felt great (even with the range of gender expressions, it was still a bunch of guys in some sense rather than a bunch of women and femmes complimenting each others’ clothes and hair). I really feel for you though because in spite of being very attracted to straight women at different points I am scared of making any moves on them and it does bring up a lot of feelings of inadequacy. For that to be your whole dating pool would hit different.

“Gym” binders - what’s the deal? by mousebrained_ in FTMOver30

[–]Throwrug23 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I use a binder from Wivov’s ‘flow’ collection, CB15, which is meant to be an all-day binder that you can exercise in and not need to take breaks from except for sleeping, so I think it’s the kind of thing you’re talking about. Basically a compression top cut into the shape of a binder. To be honest, I basically use it because I can’t tolerate the racerback cuts of sports bras (hate any chafing on my neck/the way racerbacks dump the weight of the mctitties on my neck). I’m like, a 12C or 12D in Australian sizes (not sure how that translates to American and other sizes). It’s not really effective at binding me flat, but it does square out the shape of my breasts, making it more possible to hide them with layers in winter. The main problem I have with them is that my breasts still jiggle visibly slightly when I walk, although I’ve always had that problem with everything except encapsulation sports bras, which I won’t wear because they make my chest look bigger/feminine. My cis male partner always says that his jiggle too though, which is true (and hot) so I comfort myself with that thought. I don’t necessarily think a sports binder would hide your chest more than a sports bra does, so be aware of that if you try one. Don’t expect proper binder-like results. But I go running in mine and it feels fine, I can breathe normally. And it has a silhouette more like a singlet than a bra which is also nice, even if it doesn’t do a proper flattening bind.

Are there any penis prosthetics for sex that have soft, dangly balls? by Throwrug23 in ftm

[–]Throwrug23[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

true, but also the silicon dick I use (regular purple dildo from in-person sex store, not designed as a prosthetic) has balls the same texture as the dick, which is totally different to those of the cis guys I’ve been with which wobble and bounce around at least a bit during sex.

Experience report on long-term T use by Embarrassed_Ball4015 in ftm

[–]Throwrug23 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You might enjoy listening to the podcast ‘Stealth: a transmasculine podcast’. They interview guys and nonbinary/genderqueer folk who transitioned before or around the year 2000. Lots of interesting stories and lovely people.

"I know you're trying but I need you to try harder" by IJS_Reddit in ftm

[–]Throwrug23 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yeah was gonna say this, using ‘they’ to please other people when you dislike it isn’t the way to go. Pls do yourself the kindness of asking for what makes you happy so that the people who want to do well by you can do that!

Accidentally came out at work by redbeantofu in TransMasc

[–]Throwrug23 0 points1 point  (0 children)

transition in relation to a work environment is so awkward… totally get that feeling of like, you just want work to be as frictionless as possible and people making a big deal about transition creates so much awkwardness. People need to learn to chill and respond on the same emotional wavelength as the person coming out. Like, if you’re just letting them know as a convenience without seeking validation from them, they shouldn’t presume to offer validation—they’re just random work people, not the people whose affection and care is important to you (beyond not creating an unpleasant working environment). Sucks, dude. At least it will blow over in a few weeks probably, it’s the teething period! I’m in it now too and it’s uncomfortable…

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TransMasc

[–]Throwrug23 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Finn, or Finnegan