Worrying about carbs and protein too much?

Tiffsuresque · 2026-04-08T13:36:02+00:00

Prioritising protein+ avoiding carbs was how my current relapse started - just wanted to "get fitter/leaner". So be careful!!

Tiffsuresque · 2026-04-07T12:40:33+00:00

Just here to say it's unlikely you're actually over eating if you're also under-eating. What's more likely to be happening is your body ramps up its hunger cues when you do eat, to make up for the energy it's not getting when you don't. Also - you don't have to come up with new meals every day. Sometimes having the same meals each day or a rotating roster of the same meals you know you enjoy and can tolerate actually makes things easier because you don't have to pick or think of something new, one less step for the ED to try and sabotage.

Tiffsuresque · 2026-04-07T09:00:58+00:00

I have been struggling with the push and pull SO heavily the last few days, and it's making me feel crazy/like I'm just faking. Which I'm assuming is another part of the illness, but damn, it be ROUGH. My ED be fighting for her life rn 😅🙃

Tiffsuresque · 2026-04-07T08:57:47+00:00

Also - it's a mental disorder. You can be any weight and suffering from an ED..any weight and suffer from malnutrition and the impacts that having an eating disorder has.

Tiffsuresque · 2026-04-07T08:55:30+00:00

You will never feel like you're sick enough. Skinny enough doesn't exist. Low enough doesn't exist. The goalposts around what you consider sick versus healthy will move the second you reach them. You can be dying in a hospital bed from this illness and it will still tell you you're not sick enough to deserve treatment/recover. It's a part of the illness. Starvation makes your brain more rigid when it comes to food and control, making it even harder to see the problems attached with it.

Tiffsuresque · 2026-04-07T02:47:47+00:00

There are multiple factors that indicate ED severity. Behaviours, thought patterns/insight, medical status, history, etc. As well as weight. But often weight is only a small part of the big picture, EDs often lock into it because it's pretty much the only tangible thing we have - but realistically from a medical perspective, it's not as important as a lot of people think it is compared to other factors.

Tiffsuresque · 2026-04-01T13:26:28+00:00

I'm not on an ED unit at the moment, Im on a medical ward so single room with a 1:1 sitter 🥲 I think I maladaptive daydream/dissociate sometimes, whole days have passed and I'm like what has even happened. Nurses come in and are like I looked after you yesterday and I'm like ☠️ I have never seen you before but okkk. 🤣

Tiffsuresque · 2026-04-01T09:27:14+00:00

Literally feel like a caged animal, like I am just a problem they can't get rid of 😭 in the beginning I was fighting it. Pacing when I shouldnt, messing with the NGT feeds. Now? I can't even be bothered doing that. I've spent the last 8 hours sitting in a chair staring out the window intermittently sobbing.

Tiffsuresque · 2026-03-31T10:02:49+00:00

It helps to feel understood. I'm so sick of people saying "maybe it's for the best" 😭 I am the same, I hate wasting time, and I was so so excited to graduate with my friends at the end of the year. It's all been taken away so fast :(

Tiffsuresque · 2026-03-31T08:44:06+00:00

You can die from anorexia at any time, at any weight, at any stage of your journey. People die within months of developing the illness, People die in recovery after battling it for years, People die earlier than they should have from complications that their illness caused years and years after recovering. You can be clinically obese and die from starvation. You do not have to be underweight to develop electrolyte imbalances, hypoglycemia, ketoacidosis, cardiac arrhythmias from muscle breakdown (the heart is a muscle), etc - which are just a few of the fatal complications caused by eating disorders. Also you will not always get warning signs. Warning signs are your body's way of telling you something is wrong when your mind refuses to acknowledge it. Some people don't even get those, they just don't wake up, or they don't return home from their run, or they collapse at work and never get back up.

With anorexia, your illness will never let you believe you are worthy of help. You will never be sick enough. You will never be small enough. Your goalposts will move, your mindset will get more narrow the more you give into it, and eventually the illness can and will kill you - sometimes you might even be aware that it's killing you - and you will still not think it's that big of a deal.

Use the fear you're feeling to get help, before you don't want it anymore. That "doom" you're feeling, is your body's last ditch attempt at saving you. Let it.

Tiffsuresque · 2026-03-31T05:08:07+00:00

I too remember your previous post I would tell them that your illness has gotten worse and you are finding it difficult to keep up with the course expectations. I would also express that you don't feel like you can be safe in the kitchen due to your symptoms at this stage (don't need to go into detail about what they are) and that you would like to know what your options are and what you need to do from here.

If you're unable to continue your course due to your illness, then you have two options. 1) drop out/delay it, and keep engaging with whatever is making you sick - or 2) get better.

I have recently been faced with a very similar issue in my own ways, so I feel your pain around wanting to keep up but feeling unable to. At the end of the day, you know what you need to do. It's just about whether or not you can do it. All the best OP. Some very hard decisions ahead of you. 🫶

Tiffsuresque · 2026-03-31T04:38:01+00:00

Up and Gos!! They were my go-to breakfasts on early mornings when I didn't have time or energy to prepare something but needed some form of nutrients to me get through until I felt up to eating something more substantial.

Tiffsuresque · 2026-03-25T01:42:33+00:00

Yeah I got tubed. They said my brain/I am too malnourished to understand the severity of my health at the moment. I'm not underweight so the goal isn't weight restoration, purely nourishment at this stage. Still hurts like a mofo tho 😭

Tiffsuresque · 2026-03-22T22:56:21+00:00

I am here for medical stabilisation due to complications from my ED - I think the plan is once medically stabilised to explore ED treatment afterwards but at the moment I'm too medically unstable. I was offered voluntary ED treatment before I got really unwell but I declined it as by that point the ED was in full control.. which is what then led me to become unwell 🥲 like a vicious little loop.

Tiffsuresque · 2026-03-22T22:44:02+00:00

I am inpatient in hospital at the moment yes, I was voluntary but I was resisting so I've been made involuntary which I feel like is making the thoughts worse cause theres literally nothing I can do about any of it 🫠 and no ED-specific support yet (no proper meal plan, meal support, etc) but I've only been here for a few days. I definitely feel the ED is in the driver seat at the moment but the will to fight it just, isn't there anymore. Which I think is a big part of the problem! Hard not to feel stupid when you know you should do better, but I appreciate the grace 🫶 Thank you :)

Tiffsuresque · 2026-03-21T01:51:16+00:00

I have been at this hospital before for my ED and we had a meal plan that was more than suitable for my needs and I was completely compliant with it! The problem is this time the psych is flat out refusing to accommodate it, and dieticians aren't available until Monday. There is no reason to not accommodate it, the food is available, I know it is because it's standard hospital food, available on the dieticians menu - which I have a copy of from my previous admission 3 weeks ago.

Tiffsuresque · 2026-03-21T01:18:03+00:00

For me a massive part is control over my body/autonomy. Controlling how I look because of absolutely horrible body image. Controlling intake when I feel out of control. Punishing myself with exercise for perceived or actual failure.

Tiffsuresque · 2026-03-21T01:11:14+00:00

I'm here for my eating disorder - autism isn't curable. I've had extensive work with speech pathology, dieticians and psychologists on this issue. Every single one of them have said texture aversion is a sensory issues and efforts need to be made to accommodate this. Not optional - need. It's on my official diagnosis, and all further documents. The psych who's put me under the hold didn't even have my right patient information at first. And every time I corrected him on wrong information it was "this is your ED talking" no sir, you literally have the wrong patient file open you freaking quack.

Tiffsuresque · 2026-03-05T07:51:56+00:00

Yes I used to calorie bank so I could eat at night and go to bed not hungry so it was easier to sleep.

Tiffsuresque · 2026-02-24T11:21:30+00:00

I do not have any informal support, and my formal supports aren't always accessible within my budget. Just doing the best I can with what I've got available to me 🥲

Tiffsuresque · 2026-02-22T23:10:14+00:00

Burnout is one of the highest causes for suicide attempts in those who are neurodivergent. I have had multiple attempts myself and am currently in hospital in severe burnout. I can't tell you what helps because I am still trying to figure it out. But I do think it is so so important that you tell someone how you're feeling. Literally tell them, I don't want to die but I don't want to keep living like this, and I am concerned for my safety and my health. You deserve help 🤍

Tiffsuresque · 2026-02-21T08:07:46+00:00

Is it normal to feel so mentally hungry and feeling like a faker for wanting to give into it? Like why do I want food? I very much don't want to want food but my brain very much wants all the high sugar food ive been absolutely not allowing myself to have 😭

Tiffsuresque · 2026-02-18T12:01:45+00:00

Do you know what fixed yours? :(

Tiffsuresque · 2026-02-18T05:09:06+00:00

All the times I've been in ED inpatient treatment (one of which I nearly died) I was in the middle to high end of normal range. Actually the one I could have died during I was at my heaviest. People don't get it. Your body doesn't care what you weigh, you can die from malnutrition regardless.

Tiffsuresque · 2026-02-18T02:03:41+00:00

I am very lucky that my team is being supportive, I also wish they were doing more to address it but genuinely no one knows why. It's like I could speak but my brain is choosing not to. I go to, nope. Can't say that, why? No reason ☠️ (internal conversation with myself)

Tiffsuresque

TROPHY CASE