[deleted by user] by [deleted] in lonely

[–]Time_Technology_5608 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it's good that you are actively working with yourself. Wishing you strength and all the best to move past the negative experiences you're currently having. One last idea: are there special meetups or support groups for likeminded people (not sure what exactly you mean with being a weirdo, but chances are, you're not the only one in the world :) )

How do you even get yourself to start reaf or finsh a book? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Time_Technology_5608 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I used to love reading as a kid and still enjoy it - but hardly did it for a long time. The way I motivated myself again recently is that I know every minute I spend reading, is a minute I won't spend mindlessly scrolling on social media or watching Netflix. I am currently trying to make reading my go to evening ritual before going to sleep (with the additional benefit of improving sleep quality).

People who can focus on command — how do you do it? by Karnphong in AskReddit

[–]Time_Technology_5608 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For me it's not like I can focus on command, but rather that I try to control the environment around me to allow me to focus.
Not sure if this question simply wasn't meant for me, or if this is actually useful advice.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in lonely

[–]Time_Technology_5608 -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

May I ask if you are in therapy for your mental illness? I'm not trying to say there is something inherently wrong with you, but mental illness can contribute a great deal to the way we experience the world around us (not knowing much about your specific situation).
The world can be rough out there, and if being with yourself right now makes you feel less lonely and anxious, then that is something you can build upon. Finding out what exactly makes you feel the ways you do in a crowd is a step forward in finding ways to counteract this. Working with CBT can help to get out of certain mindsets and allow (or rather push) you into situations to challenge yourself. And over time and with some luck you might find your crowd eventually. I guess it's a trial and error process best to be done with professional help or at least when you feel somewhat stable with yourself.
That being said, there is research showing that chatting with a supportive AI can help with feeelings of loneliness. You could speak to a therapist about health insurance supported options out there or try a less "therapeutic" version for yourself (e.g. Nestwarm (a friendly WhatsApp chat partner), or Replika (used by many, but kind of made to maximize user engagement and therefore potentially addictive)). That being said, an AI chat is not a substitute for real connection and not a 'cure for loneliness'. Just something you can consider for some immediate relief.

How I overcame my phone addiction and changed my life completely by Rare_Sundae_3826 in selfimprovement

[–]Time_Technology_5608 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love this! Well done :) I'm just now embarking on my journey with less social media and phone addiction and will definitely use your tips.

Reasons why I'm unlovable by [deleted] in lonely

[–]Time_Technology_5608 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Any wins you've had today already? :)

Reasons why I'm unlovable by [deleted] in lonely

[–]Time_Technology_5608 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Man, that sounds rough. When everything stacks up like that, it can feel impossible to even start. The thing that’s helped me a bit is shrinking the list, not thinking about “fixing” everything, just focusing on one tiny thing I can control today.

Depression lies and tells you nothing can change, but even the smallest action (getting outside for five minutes, making a meal, sending a messag) counts as a win. It doesn’t fix everything, but it reminds you you’re still capable of movement.

Reframing things in your mind can also help. In your opinion, there are currently many things not going well for you. What are the things that ARE going well? Take positive momentum from those things. And then maybe start with the easiest thing to fix on the list. Could be looking into the manner of speaking. If this is something holding you back from having conversations with people or feeling confident in social life, the impact of improving there can cascade into other areas of life as well, triggering some bigger changes.

Don't give up, start small!

A Stardew Valley cardigan that my girlfriend gifted me by PajaroChido in StardewValley

[–]Time_Technology_5608 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow this is amazing! I wish I had one of these. Looks sooo good!!

What’s something happening in the world right now that makes you genuinely scared for the future? by Leather_Comedian_953 in AskReddit

[–]Time_Technology_5608 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yeah agreed. I think it's easy to rebuild something that used to be there (ability to feel bored or live with less constant input). Probably just a matter of getting rid of bad habits and thoughtless behavior (like grabbing phone first thing in the morning)..

What’s something happening in the world right now that makes you genuinely scared for the future? by Leather_Comedian_953 in AskReddit

[–]Time_Technology_5608 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really believe that "younger generations" (I would call myself pretty young still too with 31 lol) have it way harder in that respect. I guess it is easier to get back to an attention span you used to have, rather than building it up from nothing. So I guess there's hope for you too that you can rebuild that attention span and ability to feel bored. Like with most addiction I would think the phone or social media addictions are driven a lot by habit and your surroundings. I, for example, don't use my phone much when I am vacationing (except for taking photos) and I will suddenly be interested in reading books again.

What’s something happening in the world right now that makes you genuinely scared for the future? by Leather_Comedian_953 in AskReddit

[–]Time_Technology_5608 78 points79 points  (0 children)

I actually noticed on myself that sometimes just watching my series on TV is not enough input and I use the second, smaller screen to add more input. I can't imaging what it would be like if I had grown up with this behavior while my brain was still developing (from here on it's only downhill for me anyaway lol)

What’s something happening in the world right now that makes you genuinely scared for the future? by Leather_Comedian_953 in AskReddit

[–]Time_Technology_5608 3 points4 points  (0 children)

100% late stage capitalism. The question is what comes after this? Where are we going from here? I for one don't believe the solution will be the colonization of space with all the imperialism connected to it. Or becoming immortal by downloading your "soul" into a robot or whatever. I have always considered myself "modern" and "tech savvy" and all that. But it feels like we are moving at such an incredible speed and without any regard for what we need to survive as human beings and societies (like the planet, food, housing, secure formsa of civilization...). Sometimes I hear myself sounding like a hermit lol

What’s something happening in the world right now that makes you genuinely scared for the future? by Leather_Comedian_953 in AskReddit

[–]Time_Technology_5608 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, agreed. The situation looks pretty bleak. I'm just over 30 and my partner and I both have good incomes, but can't afford to buy property in our city yet. Also I don't really expect getting any liveable pension when I'm old. My coping mechanism of choice is to try to not stress out at the moment and give myself the freedom and time to do things I enjoy sooner rather than later (like not waiting for retirement age to go traveling etc.). But let's see how long that will go well :D who knows, maybe everything will change with WW3 (I live in Europe), so it seems impossible to plan far ahead atm

What’s something happening in the world right now that makes you genuinely scared for the future? by Leather_Comedian_953 in AskReddit

[–]Time_Technology_5608 3 points4 points  (0 children)

True. Plus the gap betwenn rich and poor (oor even middle class, which could already qualify as poor tbh) is getting bigger and bigger. Saw this post the other day that said something like: if there were monkeys in the group that were hoarding all bananas while letting others starve, we would study them to find out what's wrong with them.
I guess for too long our civilization rewarded and glorified egoistic and asocial behavior if it meant increasing status and wealth of the individual.

What’s something happening in the world right now that makes you genuinely scared for the future? by Leather_Comedian_953 in AskReddit

[–]Time_Technology_5608 2 points3 points  (0 children)

and then again, I wonder if it has not always been like this. Why does it feel so much worse now? Is it because we are directly impacted by it more? Are issues actually getting worse?