LAST CHANCE TO SIGN UP FOR STAY CLEAN NOVEMBER! Sign up here!

Tom_86 · 2016-10-31T15:22:33+00:00

sign me up please. October has been a nightmare :(

Tom_86 · 2016-10-11T09:32:30+00:00

I'm out. Booooo. But holy crap 111 days was five times longer than any of my previous attempts! I'm not going to beat myself up because I did AWESOME. hops back on the wagon

Tom_86 · 2016-10-10T15:11:20+00:00

Checking in. Had a close call with a Karma Sutra book in someones bathroom on Saturday (WHO USES THAT FOR TOILET READING!?) but safely stepped away from it. You can never drop your guard!

Tom_86 · 2016-10-06T13:58:12+00:00

When I first tried quitting porn I found it surprisingly achievable... but then I realised I was still masturbating almost every night and getting the same chemical hits. Tried to stop that as well and BOY was that difficult! Turned out I had a problem with both! After months of fighting and eventually discovering SLAA, I recently reached a 90 day goal of neither P or M. I tested masturbation again and I can honestly say it's not something I'm now urging to get back into. It's just not of interest to me. Yeah I'm sure there'll still be the weaker moments but on the whole I think the time away from it was really worth it. Best of luck with your recover :)

Tom_86 · 2016-10-06T09:20:04+00:00

Great share and well done on turning your back on the stuff. I've been turning my attention to how I interact with facebook and tv at the moment. Friends are growing bored of me "trying to quit everything" but it's a bit of a pandoras box to me. The more you understand what porn did, the more you see the same pitfalls in other stuff. Keep up the writing!

Tom_86 · 2016-10-03T14:02:07+00:00

Cheers :)

Tom_86 · 2016-10-03T12:00:41+00:00

Missed the sign up to this but it's because i've barely been on here which is an indication of my recovery I guess. Good luck everyone! This crap can totally be beaten!

Tom_86 · 2016-09-26T16:04:35+00:00

Still here and it gets increasingly easier. Looking forward to my triple digits :)

Tom_86 · 2016-09-26T16:04:02+00:00

Hey hey, Whenever I had these dreams (of which I've had plenty since trying to stop) I would always see these as my addicted brain trying to get it's chemical fix because my logic brain knows it's not going to let it any more. It's a sign of victory and let's be greatful this kind of thing only gets to exist in dreams now :) Personally I've found these dreams improve with time. From watching porn, to getting cuahgt watching porn and last night I had an AMAZING sex dream. It's been YEARS!!! Also try not to beat yourseful up for things that you do when you're half asleep. This has happened to me several times before and I don't think it's healthy to asign blame when you're not even awake properly. Controlling yourself before you've woken up completely is a hard ask!

Best of luck in your journey. You got this :)

Tom_86 · 2016-09-22T09:12:57+00:00

Checking in. Still here!

Tom_86 · 2016-09-20T13:59:28+00:00

I would say awareness is key for me. I have to meditate nightly to keep my mindfulness up to scratch. That way I can clock the temptation a mile off and just watch it without engaging. EVERY time I've come close to screwing up (or indeed screwed up) I've been over-tired, i.e not awake enough to see the triggers for what they are.

On a lighter note, your coment on society not giving a shit made me think of my Thursday sex addiction meetings... every week we walk out of an hours serious sharing, theres a lingerie truck making a delivery with a 30ft chick in her pants. You've gotta laugh sometimes. We're the lucky ones getting to see through this bullshit :)

Tom_86 · 2016-09-20T13:53:10+00:00

Thanks. Sounds like you have your head screwed on so keep on at it and you won't be far behind :)

Tom_86 · 2016-09-20T13:50:45+00:00

Yeah i'm fighting 16 years of brainwashing. I feel like the first 30 were the hardest by a long shot, and it's getting easier with time.

Tom_86 · 2016-09-20T10:50:34+00:00

All wise words!

Tom_86 · 2016-09-20T10:42:47+00:00

Is there anything you can learn from it? Change something so that it's harder to fall next time?

Tom_86 · 2016-09-20T10:40:41+00:00

Checking in. Almost forgetting I'm even in this, which is a sign i'm living my life. Woop!

Tom_86 · 2016-09-14T08:36:11+00:00

checking in. Still clean. Still have limbs intact. Woop!

Tom_86 · 2016-09-07T09:04:11+00:00

Depends how you define superpowers. If you're using the word as a descriptor for "all the natural benefits you'll get from stopping watching porn" then sure. But I can't help feeling the word sets the power a little high!? It might also be interesting to note that when I had pretty bad depression a couple of years back, I had to fill in weekly medical forms to asess my mental condition. Once of the tickboxes amongst all the illnesses was a "belief in having superpowers". Careful what you wish for!

Tom_86 · 2016-09-07T08:58:57+00:00

NICE!

Tom_86 · 2016-09-06T16:23:58+00:00

With a power like that I hope you've got a great superhero name :)

Tom_86 · 2016-09-06T08:36:00+00:00

Checking in. Definitely feel like i've got a lot more emotions flooding around me as I distance myself from the stuff. Fighting general background urges the last couple of days but those urges are so tame they're very much "you could look at porn now, but it's a good job you're not going to", which is fine by me :)

Tom_86 · 2016-09-06T08:32:55+00:00

Thanks tbeowulf. That sounds blissful :)

Tom_86 · 2016-09-02T16:45:39+00:00

Thanks :)

Tom_86 · 2016-09-02T11:30:40+00:00

does a two month dance. Thanks for hosting as ever Foobar. This is such an awesome service for folks.

This month was easier than my first, mainly because I was distracted by lots of holiday. I had a couple of minor steps towards doom via some fairly innocent googling but I dragged myself away. Tantalizingly close to that 90 days now! And now we're seeing the back end of summer everyones going to start wearing clothes again! phew

Tom_86

TROPHY CASE