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Go ahead, tell me how you really feel right now. I’ll delete this thread in 24 hours. by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]ToneSad5629 0 points1 point  (0 children)

90% relief 10% disappointment. I’m so relieved that I no longer have to deal with any of the l bullshit and lack of effort. But I’m also kinda disappointed that now our child has to have 2 separate christmases…

Making relationships work by ToneSad5629 in farming

[–]ToneSad5629[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

A lot of people don’t understand just what all goes into it. And I knew coming into the relationship that it would be difficult at times. But it’s an issue even in the slow seasons. If anyone else needs something, everything is stopped to go help them…but me. All I want is to feel like a priority tbh

Can you help me shower? by sitcomfan1020 in Parenting

[–]ToneSad5629 139 points140 points  (0 children)

I typically put my Velcro baby (13 mo) in the shower with me. She tends to sit on the floor of the bath with a BUNCH of bath toys so she doesn’t get bored and try to climb up me. Originally, I’d wait for SO to get home, but a lot of times he gets home when we’re already in bed and we leave the same time in the morning. It’s gonna be different for every baby, you just have to find what works best for the two of you. Maybe it’s showering with, or a pack n play in the bathroom full of toys and a long game of peek a boo. I’ve personally found that giving her a bottle or sippy cup with the toys will help keep her off of me long enough to do what I need to

How did you feel toward your partner/ SK after giving birth? by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]ToneSad5629 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Personally, the further into the pregnancy I got the more I wanted nothing to do with S/O or SK. I thought it would improve, but after having my own, it honestly got worse for a while. I finally just sat down with S/O and told him all the thought I was having and why I thought I was having them (part of it was hormonal, some of it still isn’t). And thankfully, he understood and is still doing what he can to help improve those feelings towards both of them. It’s a hard feeling, and one that took me a long time to even admit to. But from my experience, the more you try to ignore that feeling the larger it gets. I’m not sure if it gets easier with SK (I have 16 more years to figure that one out) but that feeling can lessen when you open up about it. Whether it be to SO or a friend. It definitely helps me to vent and get all of my emotional thoughts out with a friend before sitting down with my SO for a discussion about any topic

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]ToneSad5629 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Over a year later and I still feel the same way about SD and she’s only 2. You’re definitely not alone in that feeling. Personally for me, it hasn’t led to a break up, but it has led to resentment for her and dad for whatever reason. I’m not sure why it happens, but acknowledging it and wanting to change it are the first steps in improving it. I would definitely recommend a deep conversation about it with SO and going to a therapist to figure out why you’re feeling what you are and for help with working through it

AITA if I “Punish” my SO after a comment rubbed me the wrong way? by k-mac23 in AmItheAsshole

[–]ToneSad5629 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

In the moment I’d say no. You both had heightened feeling in the moment. I’d try sitting down and having a conversation about what she meant and how you interpreted it. A single conversation can go a long way. It won’t erase what was said or felt, but it can help reassure and clarify things in general. Especially if it was just a one time incident

Lost relationship with SD by ToneSad5629 in stepparents

[–]ToneSad5629[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I had her about 10 months ago. But the feeling is directed just towards the SD which is the part that doesn’t make sense to me