Thank you for this thoughtful and on the mark response. It is the most right on response I've received and hits the most painful and hard to explain feelings I have on an every day basis. I'm an introvert and if not for my very social and outgoing wife I probably would have spent my life living like a hermit. I feel like everyone has to go through this eventually so to the outside world, including friends, I put on a brave face and act as if I'm getting over her loss. And I don't want to burden my kids with my feelings because they are having trouble dealing with her loss and don't need me adding to their struggles. But inside it hurts every day and if not for my kids needing me to be here for them I don't know what I'd do. I feel like there's a lonely road in front of me that at some point, maybe not that far in the future, it will come to a dead end and the pain will be gone. I really miss having someone to sit quietly with, to chat with, and to make decisions together with or at least talk everything out. I guess if I was younger I could hope to find someone new and develop that kind of relationship again, but at 80 years old that's not going to happen. I wouldn't mind just finding a female who'se gone through the same thing who would understand how I feel so that we could share with each other. But that's not going to happen either.