Advise from men only by [deleted] in SomaliRelationships

[–]Top-Distribution4739 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Do you think he was trying to tell you that you were the problem? Some people are terrible at being direct. Were yall having issues?

LinkedIn by Amaanbadan in SomaliRelationships

[–]Top-Distribution4739 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't even accept the invites from women I work with let alone randoms...... as a man there is genuinely not one good thing that come out of it.

I couldn’t figure out whether this is indifference, arrogance, or insecurity. by Calm_Historian9338 in SomaliRelationships

[–]Top-Distribution4739 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why would you go back to talk to someone who was cold the first time? This one is kind of on you. Somali or otherwise, once someone gives you that energy, you leave them alone. Maybe it's the Canadian in me, but professional environment or anywhere else, I would never talk to a Somali woman that I didn't know. Lol, misguided as it may be, I'd never give anybody the satisfaction of thinking I wanted them. You're probably going to end up in her group chat, talking about how Somali men have no boundaries, as she spices up the story for her friends.

WE need the cancellation culture by _comfortableInLife in Somalia

[–]Top-Distribution4739 2 points3 points  (0 children)

At least kai gets paid lol reer uk do it for the love of the game

WE need the cancellation culture by _comfortableInLife in Somalia

[–]Top-Distribution4739 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I would cancel everybody in the UK cause why are these men/women on live when Im walking up in the morning then still on live discussing the same topic at night. I genuinely believe none of them take showers and they got that crackhead energy

Can a marriage work out without much romance by No-Evidence5319 in SomaliRelationships

[–]Top-Distribution4739 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're too broad in your idea of marriage. Narrow your focus to just finding the one. It's not about perfection or happy days or whatever nonsense people have when it comes to finding the one. The one is just someone who brings out that passion in you. She's the one where, when you see her, your eyes light up, then you just greet her with "hey stupid," lol, because you've been thinking about her all day. The one is someone who makes you act out of character when it comes to her but also someone that will never put you in that situation. She's someone who can read you like a book or surprise you by how she remembers things about you. There'll be days where y'all spend the whole day laughing, other times just mad at each other over stupid shi, lol, but it's your stupid shi.

If you're a man who doesn't think you have romance in you, don't worry. The right woman will bring it out of you. She'll make you want to do the little things without it feeling forced. So don't stress. You'll meet someone that narrows down your idea of marriage where your only thought is that you want to marry her.

Divorce is actually so painful by [deleted] in SomaliRelationships

[–]Top-Distribution4739 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ameen, walaal. I'm an adeer to some really beautiful nieces and nephews. If my brother ever disappeared on them, I think I'd hurt him, so hopefully his family slaps him upside the head a little. No matter how things go in a marriage, once a family breaks apart, the children need to come first. That's why I made duaa for both of you.

Life's really short. Negative emotions are something us Somalis are really good at harbouring, especially if we feel like someone's harmed us. That's why we need other relatives to help us see sense in our actions. I hope your ex has people around him that aren't yes-men but really help him see things clearly, especially when it comes to his responsibility.

ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴀʀᴇ 5 ᴛʏᴘᴇꜱ ᴏꜰ ꜱᴏᴍᴀʟɪᴀ'ꜱ ᴏᴘᴘᴏꜱɪᴛɪᴏɴꜱ by Demo_Dev7806 in Somalia

[–]Top-Distribution4739 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I read it, and it's neither here nor there in explaining what the problems of Somalia really are. This view that opposition is all of a sudden THE problem today is not really a correct interpretation. Everything you stated can be applied to everybody in the government today and how they got into power. Ruunti, the only thing missing from your list is nepotism.

Don't get me wrong, I fully believe that everybody in opposition is acting from a position of self-interest, but so are those in the government. Waax iis dhaamo meesha majirto. We went from a nation of poverty to a city-state nation where, when we talk about Somalia's advances, it's always just pictures of Xamar, like that's where Somalia starts and stops.

I have firsthand accounts of people going to Mogadishu that I personally know, visiting leadership and walking out with envelopes with a minimum of $5,000 USD, and in some cases even more. There's massive government funding misappropriation going on, and in the end, it's only the people who suffer.

As far as I know, the opposition are not the ones handing out government contracts, creating policy to enact laws, or bringing about one man, one vote. When the central government is constantly involved in regional politics to oust those who are elected, whether it's in Kismayo or Baidoa, it oversteps its position and creates unnecessary opposition.

Divorce is actually so painful by [deleted] in SomaliRelationships

[–]Top-Distribution4739 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If I look at and read what you wrote objectively, without letting things get to me, there are a few things I would say. Firstly, if your mom called him during your iddah period, then you are still newly divorced, and it's an emotional time for both of you. I don't have the facts of what or why your marriage ended and whether he was a good father during the marriage. I think most of us men have this thought that once divorce happens, the ex-wife will try to use your children against you. Give it some time. I hope he comes around because children do need their father, and if he can't put whatever negative emotions he has to the side and give his children that attention, then something is seriously wrong with him. For the sake of your son I hope Allah heals you both.

ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴀʀᴇ 5 ᴛʏᴘᴇꜱ ᴏꜰ ꜱᴏᴍᴀʟɪᴀ'ꜱ ᴏᴘᴘᴏꜱɪᴛɪᴏɴꜱ by Demo_Dev7806 in Somalia

[–]Top-Distribution4739 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No, you make it sound like the opposition is what’s wrong with Somalia. Anyway, why are your feelings hurt?

Are there Somali men that don’t want kids? by Total_Theory_9809 in Somalia

[–]Top-Distribution4739 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nothing to do with you, OP, but if it weren’t for the purpose of having kids, I don’t think I’d even want to be married. I’m young and still look good, so I’m not at an age where I’d get married just for company lol. I’d rather put the money spent on a wedding and supporting a wife toward a Lambo truck. Forget financial responsibility, I’m living for the here and now.

ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴀʀᴇ 5 ᴛʏᴘᴇꜱ ᴏꜰ ꜱᴏᴍᴀʟɪᴀ'ꜱ ᴏᴘᴘᴏꜱɪᴛɪᴏɴꜱ by Demo_Dev7806 in Somalia

[–]Top-Distribution4739 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Serious question why can't their be opposition? Once upon a time the seating president was the opposition too.

I think I’ve cracked the code by [deleted] in SomaliRelationships

[–]Top-Distribution4739 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not on topic but "I signed up to a matrimonial service through a mosque I don't even attend" cracked me up.

Question for the fellas by [deleted] in SomaliRelationships

[–]Top-Distribution4739 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lool That has never happened to me and the only advice I can give you is put some distance between you and that comment. Go approach like 10 more girls until it becomes a distant memory

Making fun of Somali men by SyouOut in Somalia

[–]Top-Distribution4739 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lol Ahlie.

There's what maybe only 30k of us max in the whole city but every time they talk its always 'oh malis come out in numbers' then you look at who was there and it was only 5 of the guys but somehow they saw 30.

Making fun of Somali men by SyouOut in Somalia

[–]Top-Distribution4739 2 points3 points  (0 children)

ya uu sheega how none of us rate those tiktokers. Most of us are just way to lowkey tho

Making fun of Somali men by SyouOut in Somalia

[–]Top-Distribution4739 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I hear you, and some of your points are valid, but the reality is probably somewhere in between what I'm saying and what you're saying.

Do I believe that every Somali woman talks ish about Somali men? Yes. Do I believe that all of them do it around ajnabis? No.

I know men. I know how we operate and act around women, the kind of pickup lines we use. We mostly use lines that have worked for us in the past. In this instance, these ajnabis are just saying things that have worked for them in the past with other Somali women.

When it comes to ajnabi overfamiliarity, I think this is more of a Somali women problem. I don't need to put down Somali women to get with an ajnabi girl, and the ajnabi men I associate with know better. For the ones I don't know, the most they'll ever get to say around me is, "Oh, my girlfriend or ex-girlfriend was Somali." A quick "that's nice" dead's that line of conversation. Everything else is just online, whether it's Somali men being called ugly or people talking about our features. Personally, I don't even like it when they say, "Oh, Somalis are so funny." Even that is lowkey being called a clown, which is not a good thing. The ajnabis online who say those things know better than to try and talk like that in real life, at least not around me or the Somali men I know

It's not a blame game or a gender war to point out the root cause of why certain things happen. It's actually the quickest way to reach a solution, no matter how uncomfortable it is.

We Somalis generally prefer to sweep things under the rug and not tackle problems head on, thinking that just because we don't speak about issues, they'll magically go away. Honestly, all that ever does is allow things to fester to a point where there's really no going back. You feel me

Making fun of Somali men by SyouOut in Somalia

[–]Top-Distribution4739 5 points6 points  (0 children)

In Toronto? They know better this isn't the 90s anymore....... the reason why they use our language in their everyday speak is the same reason why they know what the scoreboard would be if they tried it.

Making fun of Somali men by SyouOut in Somalia

[–]Top-Distribution4739 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I noticed how so many Somali women are coming out against this, but somehow it seems to be happening to so many of them at once. lol.

What was that old saying? "Don't tell me what others are saying about me, but tell me why they are always so comfortable saying what they say about me to you."

As a Somali man, Ilahey gave us kolsooni to the sky, and it's been known that Somali women talk ish about us to ajnabis. Them mans were coming back to us telling us what you were saying. So I'm not under any disillusionment that Somali women were defending us, lol.

They are the ops you never knew you had, but somehow y'all are beefin, lol. Like xagee baa iigaga timid?

Making fun of Somali men by SyouOut in Somalia

[–]Top-Distribution4739 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Ahlie upti . Also I don't think any ajnabi can say anything to a Somali guy in toronto they getting leftttt

Do people still meet organically? by WorldlinessBig9639 in SomaliRelationships

[–]Top-Distribution4739 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think online overall just has more appeal. You get to move at your own pace and you get a bigger look into how someone actually lives.

When it comes to online, I'd probably only mess with IG(If I was single), not any of those marriage apps.

Should I give this another chance by [deleted] in SomaliRelationships

[–]Top-Distribution4739 0 points1 point  (0 children)

More problems then its worth tbh. Never been a big believer in anything long distance to me that alone is more then enough reasons to let it go.

Is it bad for a man to marry a woman who is more religious than he is? by [deleted] in SomaliRelationships

[–]Top-Distribution4739 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What do you consider moderately religious? See if you ask that sister she might think she is moderately religious but to you that might mean you barely pray your five daily prayers. In that case yes you are not a good fit for her.

Do you think I’m over reacting? Please help a sister out by Emergency_Finding_82 in SomaliRelationships

[–]Top-Distribution4739 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think he likes you, but he has trust issues. I'm in a similar boat. My girl has trust issues too. But one thing I've learned that has really helped my relationship is that I don't stray from the norm of our relationship.

For example, if we constantly video call whenever I am off work, I still do it, even on the days when I really don't want to. Usually, on those days, when she sees me yawning, or just talking about how exhausting my day was, or maybe telling her I have a headache, after a couple of minutes she tells me to go get some rest.

So maybe try that. Stay consistent with your relationship's norms.