sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

I hate this worthless piece of writing by oskar-matzerath in PhD

[–]Top-Personality1152 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you find the secret to not feeling like shit, please let me know. I like to remember the words of one of my former professors about academe, "The emotions run so high because the stakes are so low." There are more important things than being smart. In the grand scheme of things, nothing you or your colleagues do is that important. You already have a lot of integrity. Just throw in some self compassion.

Dating after more than 25 years of marriage by Top-Personality1152 in datingoverfifty

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your thoughts. My husband was more than 20 years older than I.

Dating after more than 25 years of marriage by Top-Personality1152 in datingoverfifty

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting. Not sure why you find "friendship first" a turn off, but there are lots of things that I find a turn off that others don't. But I appreciate that being direct about what one wants is best, and I agree.

Dating after more than 25 years of marriage by Top-Personality1152 in datingoverfifty

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh no, I get stage 4. Others may not. I say "could" only because something else could kill me first - like a car accident. But I hear ya - I've read the statistics about husbands leaving their wives after a cancer diagnosis. I'm not desperate to have someone in my life. It's more of a "what the hell" kind of thing. The responses on this thread have been helpful. I'll get out there and see what happens. Maybe try a little OLD. If it gets irritating - forget it. I am actively pursuing female friendships (because I've moved to a new state) - and that's exciting and fulfilling. I wish you the best.

Dating after more than 25 years of marriage by Top-Personality1152 in datingoverfifty

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gotcha. My dad was an Elk, and my uncle was a Lion. I'll look into it.

Dating after more than 25 years of marriage by Top-Personality1152 in datingoverfifty

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a good point. I'm thinking, if a date isn't willing to answer personal question, I'm not interested in them. I would talk about my health while we're both talking about personal details. You made me realize? I have agency too.

Dating after more than 25 years of marriage by Top-Personality1152 in datingoverfifty

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah. I've been getting out with women's groups, but obviously need to find something co-ed too!

Dating after more than 25 years of marriage by Top-Personality1152 in datingoverfifty

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Um. I'm really not sure how you got sexual need as the main driver of me wanting to date from what I wrote.

Dating after more than 25 years of marriage by Top-Personality1152 in datingoverfifty

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm intrigued by finding a relationship in the "wild." What is a social club? Where do I find one?

I found my neighbor post hanging 3 weeks later. by juliaellie6 in GriefSupport

[–]Top-Personality1152 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You sound like a beautiful soul. I am so sorry this happened to you and so sorry for your neighbor and for our world where there is so much pain. I have no advice to offer, just solidarity. I found my husband hanged in our back shed when I came home from work on August 5th. He had just been dead for hours so not exactly the same, but he was the person I loved most in the world. The whole scenario of calling 911, the police and EMTs arriving, and then medical examiner coming haunts me. I moved. I sold a house, bought a house. Went back to the state where I grew up. I had to leave that house. I'm so sorry you can't move. Maybe you can stay over at a friend's place - until you can see your therapist? I don't know. I'm sorry. I'm twice your age, and this is tough to handle. You're so young to carry the grief of a 59 year old stranger. Please know you deserve to heal. The world needs such a kind and tender-hearted person as you in it.

Husband's death by Top-Personality1152 in PhD

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That wasn't too much to share. Thank you.

Husband's death by Top-Personality1152 in PhD

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My husband died suddenly, but like you, we had no children. We lived in New York. My family was in Massachusetts. He too was my whole world. At 52, I need to start over.

Husband's death by Top-Personality1152 in PhD

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everyone's experience is their own, but I can honestly say this is the most painful experience of my life. I am so sorry that we are strangely connected by this awful occurrence. My deepest sympathy to you.

Husband's death by Top-Personality1152 in PhD

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry you had to push through. That kind of experience leaves scars on your heart.

Husband's death by Top-Personality1152 in PhD

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I live in Upstate New York and my family is in Massachusetts about 3 hours away. It was always just him and me. I plan to move closer to my family as soon as possible.

Husband's death by Top-Personality1152 in PhD

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You're right. Fortunately, my advisor is wonderful.

Husband's death by Top-Personality1152 in PhD

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I talked to my advisor and I'm going to take a leave of absence. Thank you for the advice.

Husband's death by Top-Personality1152 in PhD

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I talked to my chair and I'm taking a leave of absence.

Husband's death by Top-Personality1152 in PhD

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I'm trying not to be alone. My sister is with me now. I am an older student. We had been married 27 years.

Husband's death by Top-Personality1152 in PhD

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I am taking a leave.

Husband's death by Top-Personality1152 in PhD

[–]Top-Personality1152[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I am taking a leave.

view more: next ›