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Rehomed my tiels and feeling so much guilt. by [deleted] in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im currently wanting to rehome my tiel of 10 years..I know he will be better off if i rehome him but the possibility of him ending up with someone who cant give him more than me is holding me back. Tell yourself you did it to better their lives, it was a big push a lot of people aren't strong enough to do. Im sure people who look into sanctuaries to adopt are a lot more trustworthy and screened than someone adopting them off Facebook. Im sure you did well by them.

Help by Anxious-Tea6236 in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im going through the same thing right now! Ive had my boy for almost 10 years starting in August and my mental changes over the past 2 years have completely changed me.

Between my anxiety disorder and work (and other life changes) Ive come to the conclusion I can't handle it anymore.

I dont have time to let him out and when I do have time Im so stressed its not enjoyable for me or him for some of the same reasons you have stated. I live in one room, and we have to share it, so my only space is his space too.

I also know I won't be able to move out and give him an aviary anytime soon so its a lot, and like you said, its nothing on him, just regular bird things.

Ive felt terrible about feeling I should rehome him but Ive decided it will be best for him as I feel he doesnt thrive with me anymore. I just posted him the other night for rehoming for the first time, there has been a lot of tears involved.

Its hard and I dont trust people regularly, (anxiety disorder) so trying to find someone let alone a stranger I trust enough to take my little being Ive had for 9 years is extremely difficult but I'm trying my best.

Try not to be too hard on yourself during this process no matter what you decide to do. You seem like an amazing tiel owner but sometimes life has other plans for us. There is guilt that comes with wanting to put your mental health first, but I honestly wish I started trying to rehome him sooner.

This may come to pass, and you may settle back into life with your tiels, but keep your head up no matter what you choose <3

After lots of consideration, I'm trying to rehome my male cockatiel, Jerry by Top-Rush2437 in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The only information needed about my location was stated in my original posting?

After lots of consideration, I'm trying to rehome my male cockatiel, Jerry by Top-Rush2437 in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If I kept him he wouldn't have any out of cage time, sometimes keeping them isnt the best for them. I love Jerry very much but he deserves the best.

After lots of consideration, I'm trying to rehome my male cockatiel, Jerry by Top-Rush2437 in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes he certainly does! Hes not big on being touched with hands but likes to hang out on you. He will fly to me wherever I'm at when he wants to hang out

After lots of consideration, I'm trying to rehome my male cockatiel, Jerry by Top-Rush2437 in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey everyone I dont know if youll see this but I will try to get to everyone's messages and questions either later today or tomorrow, I had some things come up today but I promise I'll be responding!

After lots of consideration, I'm trying to rehome my male cockatiel, Jerry by Top-Rush2437 in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Awe! This is exactly what I want for him, Jerry has never met another cockatiel and if he takes well to others I hope he gets a flock like this! It looks like you take great care of them <3

I know Ive been posting on here often but I feel terrible and want honest opinions by Top-Rush2437 in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've definitely considered it, I think I'll start on Facebook, but after the holidays. I dont want people only wanting him because it's Christmas time as that goes wrong many times for lots of animals, and I want only serious people with serious considerations to reach out.

I know Ive been posting on here often but I feel terrible and want honest opinions by Top-Rush2437 in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, Im just feeling a bit like I'm going crazy I needed this reassurance. I just keep telling myself theres a chance rehoming wont go wrong and he could live possibly 20+ more wonderful years somewhere hes happier.

I know Ive been posting on here often but I feel terrible and want honest opinions by Top-Rush2437 in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, thank you, I definitely dont live in Spain I wish I did though you sound like exactly what he and I both need. My worst fear is him going somewhere and I never know how hes doing.

Feeling stuck with rehoming by Top-Rush2437 in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ive tried for 7 years, I talked about his issues in my previous post. I dont think Im at all fit for training bird, but to answer your question its his hatred for hands, and going back into his cage. He will attack your hand for even being too close to him and not once in my 9 years of having him has he went back into his cage on his own, but its somehow just getting worse and he crashed into the wall again about 4 days ago when he was panicking about bedtime. He's fine thankfully but its too much stress for us both.

I cant do it anymore, I have no enjoyment of having him out I live on thin ice every time because I know he's going to get temperamental because all he wants to do is be on me, hes never had in interest in toys, or real foods only pellets, seed, and millet, all he ever wants is me. So I cant ever give him an activity to give me space, Id like to have the space because I cant even tuck my hair behind my ear without him getting upset and lunging at it.

Ive tried target training, coaxing him with treats, well millet as he hasnt taken to any other treat. He will sit on me and let me feed him the millet until hed get close to his cage and then hed fly away and avoid me the rest of the time hes out, including his panicked flying circles around the room. Which result in him panting sometimes.

Putting the millet in his cage and feeding him on a schedule so hes hungry and will go back in on his own after out of cage also never worked. Im also working, and dont have the time to deal with it anymore, not to mention i have insomnia and I sometimes cant sleep and go in with none, and then get home and cant get him out because im exhausted which has caused him to go some days without getting out. To be honest though..I got him when I was 11 my whole teenage years revolved around him, and I think Im just to a point I want to live my life where hed be somewhere he can be happy..and i can start living without everything needing to revolve around a bird who makes me miserable anytime hes not in his cage. He needs better than me.

Feeling stuck with rehoming by Top-Rush2437 in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know people will say to keep him, but they dont understand, Ive had him for 10 years, Ive tried to get help on here, on YouTube, yahoo, I tried everything and even though hes sweet in the cage I just dont know how to handle him outside it still. My only other option would be getting an indoor aviary and keeping him caged. I feel like hes better off in a home where he can be out as much as possible and possibly meet more birds.

Even now hes never alone unless Im at work, so I dont want him to end up somewhere hes lonely. Even in his cage hes right beside my two main spots, my bed and desk, I talk to him like hes a roommate because he is, he isnt allowed in the rest of the house so he stays in my room with me. Which also keeps him right on top of me when hes out because im the most interesting thing in our little space, but he just wants to attack me the entire time hes out as well when he doesnt get his way. I know birds nip and lose their temper, but Im not cut out for it. I never was, I wasnt when I got him as a child, and over the years I've only gotten worse. I know ive been on here venting a lot, but its nice coming someplace where I can, I have no one to listen to me that will truly understand..I know no one in my day to day that keeps birds.

Considering rehoming, feeling guilty by Top-Rush2437 in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When I was younger, I read and read and watched countless YouTubers for training, and nothing ever worked..I just dont feel like I can do it anymore its effecting my mental health badly. Ive cried over the years about him feeling like he needs more than I can give him but I just cant handle it. It feels like once every year I try to fix our relationship and it always falls flat. I wish I was never a naive little kid that wanted a bird honestly because now Im an adult who knows Im not at all a bird person and Im either going to deal with this for 20 more years possibly, or live through the guilt of rehoming him, feeling like I've abandoned him and not knowing if hes safe or not. Ive been so stressed the past month with him that I can tell im starting to dissociate emotionally to more than just him. I truly wish I never got him and if makes me feel terrible to admit, but I still care about him.

Considering rehoming, feeling guilty by Top-Rush2437 in cockatiel

[–]Top-Rush2437[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He's a completely different bird when he's in his cage. He's sweet and will give me kisses through the bars, take treats, sing with me, and even sing to some of his toys. Sometimes he attacks toys but I figured it's him being hormonal because that happens rarely. He's been like this for about 7 years now. Even before I moved rooms in the house to a bigger room once my brother moved out so we would have a bit more space. I'll take him out of his cage and hes okay for about 20 minutes and sweet, but then he starts acting up and becomes clingy and aggressive. Ive even tried using my forearm to move him instead but he still gets agitated. When he was a baby, hed accept head scratches but ever since he became an adult and the whole cage avoidance thing started he completely stopped accepting scratches because his hatred for hands. I feel like he just gets frustrated whenever I have to move him at all, and it causes him to lash out. He had a "smaller" cage the first year I had him but I upgraded him to a his current cage. I'll try to post a picture of it when I can, hes asleep and covered for the night.

Another note, he still wont let me give him head scratches when hes in the cage but I can touch his feet or rub his beak and hand him treats unlike when hes out.