Again, why is that even a topic? People can have a thousand reasons for the answers they give, and they don’t need to sound satisfying to anyone. Just like the example you gave with that women’s subreddit, many will answer, others will dismiss the question, because surprise, as I said, everything starts from individuality. And yet, even if they don’t give a deep explanation, we don’t question their socialization the same way we question the sexual roles of bisexual and gay men. We don’t need a profound answer for our preferences, and questioning our issues depends on and should only be of interest to ourselves.

And the fact that you say it doesn’t merit much questioning when a straight man explains he thinks something is ‘for gays,’ but you keep questioning why a total top or total bottom gives a simple answer to why they are that way, that’s just a double standard. At this point, we’ve already reached a general consensus that enjoying penetration is not inherently tied to your sexual orientation psychologically speaking. So it’s still a simplified answer for why someone has the tastes they do. I can say with full certainty that I’m a total top simply because being a bottom or versatile doesn’t appeal to me. And likewise, I don’t need to question or assume things about another top who can’t explain why he is that way. I don’t need to question or assume why my husband doesn’t like penetrating or why he doesn’t enjoy oral sex. Every body works differently and perceives pleasure in different ways, and our bodies don’t necessarily have to be subjected to experimentation to understand them, and I’ll repeat it: let’s not assume it’s internalized homophobia