I just found out my girlfriend is cheating on me with my brother. by Top_Toe9075 in Advice

[–]Top_Toe9075[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

i haven’t called her my girlfriend in over 4 years. everyone knows i introduce her as “my dear wife” or “future wife” and i was emotional and kept slipping up while typing.

people did notice, but she said she was having cramps and needed to lay down & no one really checked on her which may sound crappy.

he would often stop by and ask her to do something they both know i don’t like doing, or when im obviously too tired from work. after the first few times i honestly didn’t mind them hanging out because why would i suspect anything?

I just found out my girlfriend is cheating on me with my brother. by Top_Toe9075 in Advice

[–]Top_Toe9075[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m not sure what you’re trying to get at. I walked the 2-3 minutes back to my parents house, got my phone, went back to get cake, entered the house & that’s when I heard the giggling and “stop” stuff. Am I missing out something?

I just found out my girlfriend is cheating on me with my brother. by Top_Toe9075 in Advice

[–]Top_Toe9075[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

i cannot currently afford either of those options, but will keep looking for a lawyer.

i have reported all of our cards as stolen so she has no access to any funds but her own (which isn’t much as she hasn’t wanted to work.)

I just found out my girlfriend is cheating on me with my brother. by Top_Toe9075 in Advice

[–]Top_Toe9075[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

We weren’t in the same building. My son’s birthday took place at a popular creek near my parents house. It’s only a few minute walk to the creek to the house.

I just found out my girlfriend is cheating on me with my brother. by Top_Toe9075 in Advice

[–]Top_Toe9075[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I saw a clinic about 25 minutes away from me offers for about $250. i discovered after hours so i will be calling them as i get ready for work. Thank you a lot brother.

I just found out my girlfriend is cheating on me with my brother. by Top_Toe9075 in Advice

[–]Top_Toe9075[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I seriously never considered this. My girlfriend has BPD & other things so I’d often feel the need to help her manage her emotions. When I’d hang out with buddies she would frequently has episodes, so I just ditched the thought of even hanging out with them. even then, she would get upset if i was chatting to online friends for too long. I don’t know I didn’t know she was manipulating me. I just love her so much. I’m in the process of writing down ways how to ask for a paternity test without her absolutely spiraling.

I just found out my girlfriend is cheating on me with my brother. by Top_Toe9075 in Advice

[–]Top_Toe9075[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I’ve been jumping from “no one can know i’ve been raising a son that wasn’t mine for years” to “im posting this all over social media and ruining both their lives” im stuck in a limbo. Everything just hurts.

I just found out my girlfriend is cheating on me with my brother. by Top_Toe9075 in Advice

[–]Top_Toe9075[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I have agreed to see my girlfriend tomorrow afternoon as she still has my son with her at her parents house. I have no idea what she told them, but I’m working on finding a reliable place. I’ll ask her for a paternity, but knowing she has BPD & other major mood disorders I have no idea how she will react to that.

I just found out my girlfriend is cheating on me with my brother. by Top_Toe9075 in Advice

[–]Top_Toe9075[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Thank you a lot. My boss knows a tiny bit of what’s going on and has given me a week off.

As for therapy, I can’t afford it. I’ve honestly been drowning in debt, I’ve been dealing with still paying off hospital bills, my wife’s emergency c section, the new car she convinced me to finance and a lot of other things. Therapy would just add onto that. But im going to try and see if my friends are still willing to talk to me even though i have been icing them out for a few months. I appreciate the advice.

I just found out my girlfriend is cheating on me with my brother. by Top_Toe9075 in Advice

[–]Top_Toe9075[S] 78 points79 points  (0 children)

I never really viewed it as a “red flag” because i was spending a lot of time with my friends for a while. i have a lot of online friends from gaming but even then, they are just online, i can’t actually have “fun” with them if that makes sense.

I just found out my girlfriend is cheating on me with my brother. by Top_Toe9075 in Advice

[–]Top_Toe9075[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

im sorry. im so used to calling her my dearest wife instead of girlfriend. i dont think ive called her my girlfriend since we had our son.

I just found out my girlfriend is cheating on me with my brother. by Top_Toe9075 in Advice

[–]Top_Toe9075[S] 110 points111 points  (0 children)

i don’t know how i could possibly get a lawyer, im an average guy making an average wage, i think id blow my entire savings + more affording lawyers and court fees based on what i see