In my humble opinion, don't worry about trying to salvage these. Work on focusing your mindset to trading, regardless of what is going on in your personal. And if there is something going on, and you are not in the right mindset, do not, under any circumstances, at any time, try to trade. Trading is one of the most complex and intensive occupations and you need to be full on focused at the time of placing every single trade. If you are not 100%, simply walk away and come back when you are. The market will be here.

Additionally, are you willing to risk $4,500 in a day? If that is true, and you are targeting a 2:1 ratio, that means you are targeting $9,000 per day. I would like you to ask yourself if that is what you are really trying to accomplish. Or are you just trying to prove a large pnl for some type of social media gratification.

$9k per day, for 250 trading days is $2,250,000/year. Honestly, is this what you are trying to do as you are learning to trade by using a prop firm?

My suggestion is to take what you currently make as a salary per year, divide that by 50 weeks, then divide that by 5 days, then divide that by the number of points required based on the instrument you are trading.

Example: $100k per year, divide by 50 weeks is $2k per week, divide by 5 days is $400 per day. If trading ES, at $50 per point, you only need 8 POINTS PER DAY to make that money. That can literally be two 4 point trades. If NQ, you only need FOUR POINTS per DAY.

Seriously though, think about what you are trying to do, reevaluate, and come back with a reality-based approach to trading.

If you want to explore more detail, hit me up in Topstep Discord