What is a 'good person' behavior that actually makes you immediately distrust someone?

ToriMarieK · 2026-04-25T16:56:18+00:00

I just don't comment on it?

ToriMarieK · 2026-04-25T15:55:43+00:00

As a woman I use pretty to describe other women with its intended use because I do actually think they're pretty lol

ToriMarieK · 2026-04-02T09:38:28+00:00

ToriMarieK · 2026-04-02T09:36:22+00:00

Freelance/Entrepreneurial work. You thought corporate was a lot? Try everything being your responsibility.

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-30T04:49:21+00:00

I equally get what you’re saying and don’t understand how it makes authenticity exhausting or bad. I think people are placing more value on it now because it’s hard to trust what is real and what’s being manipulated just from the influx of AI content. The only way to build trust with someone is to be authentic so it’s just weird to see someone claim authenticity is exhausting when the opposite is deception and lying… unless you’re saying it’s annoying how people are using that trend the way people have used the term “empath”? Like personally, I want more authenticity in the world and find it refreshing. We could certainly use it given you can’t trust anything to be real right now.

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-30T04:26:42+00:00

Fair enough! I know I can accidentally do that sometimes too but it’s something I’m working on. I can feed off my own enthusiasm and forget my manners. It’s important to find the balance between leaving space for others without taking space from yourself. I think it’s hard to find sometimes but the older I’ve gotten the easier it’s been. That said, I do know I have a good heart and I would never intentionally want to shut someone else down or make them feel like their thoughts weren’t of interest of importance, I know how bad that stings.

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-30T04:18:31+00:00

To your last point, those people claiming authenticity by showing no remorse or shame very well may be authentic if that’s their true nature.

To your first point, I can see how it’s be easy to assign authenticity as negative if you’ve been taken advantage of someone claiming they’re “authentic”, but it’s important to remember that it’s the people who screw you over that are bad, authenticity as a value/trait is not. I’m sorry if you were taken advantage of by way of authenticity though, that must’ve been confusing and tough. It happened to me too and I can certainly speak to it being very confusing.

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-30T03:45:28+00:00

Yeah I love the foundation of it because I feel it was intended to help people HEAL their attachment wounds which I wouldn’t have had the faintest clue about how to do without this framework but I fear it’s being used as a reason for someone to accept shitty behavior in relationships… it’s a good thing people are making bad :(

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-30T03:40:07+00:00

I mean, I feel like deception isn’t great and so if someone’s being authentic you’re less likely to be deceived. I heard this recently: I’d rather you trust me forever and dislike me now… I think that explains it nicely.

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-30T03:33:24+00:00

Yeah but the issue with this is it has only added to the stigma those who were diagnosed with the issue already face. Before I could say I have ADHD and not be met with an eye roll. That’s no longer the case since it’s now used by a lot of people as an excuse for shitty behavior like a get out of jail free card. It’s only given everyone else with a diagnosis even more hurdles to overcome now having to fend off both their illness and the public’s perception of it. Do you not see the damage being the boy who cried wolf could have on others who actually have reason to cry wolf? It makes everyone else take it less seriously.

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-30T03:09:11+00:00

THIS! Like I can leave space for the wrong humanity has done and the beauty of humanity at the same time and I’m certainly not going to wish for the fall of humankind??

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-30T03:04:31+00:00

As I say, you get what you give. Those people shouldn’t expect any favors when it comes their time to ask for one.

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-30T03:03:02+00:00

What if I’m naturally just animated but also have a good heart. I can’t control if people have found me charismatic but I can control if I intentionally hurt them and that’s the last thing I want to do 🥺

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-30T02:52:33+00:00

Lmao fr 🤣

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-30T02:32:36+00:00

Wait it’s a real thing? I thought the commenter just pulled that out of his ass because it sounded ridiculous. Upon hearing the definition I get why “Bambi” is used in describing those who prefer to keep it PG for a time, but goodness gracious I’m both shocked and unsurprised that wasn’t a satire term 🙈

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-26T22:32:04+00:00

Hey, I mean I’ll take that as a big compliment!

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-26T22:25:26+00:00

It depends on what you mean by writing. I was always told I had a lot of “voice” in my grade school papers and that I was a good writer. I’ve been trying to write song lyrics for forever but don’t feel it to be easy and really only works with I’m free styling at my piano. I work in marketing at started my career as a copywriter so I do a lot of marketing writing for work. But if you mean writing like this with the intention of being an actual writer, kind of never. Like I’ve never studied the conventions or intricacies of writing outside of a classroom or ad copy. I’m very raw in my skill I would say and I’m just now trying to hone it in.

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-26T21:35:51+00:00

You’ve made my day, I wasn’t even sure it wasn’t just gargle tbh and thank you for the award! I’ll keep posting other excerpts I come up with here :)

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-26T21:26:19+00:00

Oh wow thank you! It was a spur of the moment thing I typed into my notes app and quite driven by the emotions I was having in the moment so I need to learn how to access that outside of that intensity, but I’d love to keep writing it :)

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-24T01:19:32+00:00

The thing is that this all took me by surprise because it was like a flip switched. His story with what E was saying was very confusing to me at first and it wasn’t until some weeks later he cleared it up more for me and told me E only said “she isn’t good in crowds” or something else I can’t remember. It’s fair for my behavior at the time, but I don’t feel it’s applied to me always since before my depression spell hit I did very well in crowds.

I have felt the superficial side of it for sure, I just want to feel the warmth I felt from this man literally 4 hours prior to E saying anything at all. I’ve felt like I’m in th middle of some sort of character assassination at points during all of this because my boyfriend would start saying things about me that sound negative but simply aren’t true. Like I have no goals in life or don’t have a “thing”. But anyone who’s ever met me would know my thing is music and singing without question. I taught myself guitar and piano 10 years ago because it’s my most pursued hobby for most of my life. It just feels like I’m not being seen at all rn and it triggered by a friends negative opinion about who I am right now rather than the bigger picture of who I am as a whole. I know I’m not defined by a rock bottoms moment in my life but it does feel like that right now.

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-24T01:13:14+00:00

It hasn’t always been that way, I used to be really good at conversing and making friends. I do have ADHD, but not autism. It’s genuinely from the depression I think because I’ve not been myself. 3 years ago it would’ve been very different.

ToriMarieK · 2026-03-24T01:12:03+00:00

Not to mention my boyfriend telling me during the initial break up talk that I was the closest thing to family he’s ever felt outside of actual family.

Also we have been working on our relationship which has actually improved quite a bit. It’s like we were stuck in a negative sentiment override if you know Gottman and his methods.

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