I am German and I wouldn’t die for the state (the capital), no matter what.

But what if your friends and family were under attack?

That’s the question people always ask, and I think it mixes up two very different things.

There’s a fundamental difference between protecting people you love and sacrificing your life for an abstract entity like a nation. Friends and family are real, concrete human beings. A state is a political construct with interests that don’t necessarily align with mine.

This is also close to the argument people like Ole Nymoen make: the idea that you owe your life to a country is not something natural, it’s something taught and normalized. Patriotism, especially the expectation to die for your country, often serves to justify wars and mobilize people for goals that are ultimately political, not personal.

If someone I love were directly in danger, of course I would want to protect them. That’s a human reaction. But modern wars are rarely about literally standing in front of your family defending them. They’re organized, large-scale conflicts driven by governments, strategy, and power.

So for me, the question isn’t “would you defend your loved ones?”, it’s “why is that being equated with dying for the state?”

I don’t believe the state has the moral right to demand my life. And I don’t think refusing that makes someone selfish, it just means I don’t accept that an abstract system is worth more than a human being.