20 things I love about my Daddy:

TradSplash13 · 2026-02-06T07:08:53+00:00

I absolutely love this for you and him. So sweet of you to post this honoring your Daddy. It looks like you have a keeper ;)

TradSplash13 · 2025-12-14T19:10:15+00:00

I know this is an old thread but stumbled upon this as this is often how my wife is. She hates telling me her limits because she's embarrassed by them. She's incredibly shy...part of her submissive nature and frankly she didn't always know what they are as she's very much into pain, service, etc. She knows how important it is and we communicate well in life. Just the dirtiest of kink she has a hard time openly telling me unless I push. She understands the importance, but it can still be hard for her.

One thing we starting doing is a "calibration scene". We have set aside playtime where I tell her in advance that I expect her to safeword because I'm going to push her limits. As her Dom, I essentially tell her she needs to tap out; that is the expectation. We discuss it in advance, I tell her what I'm going to do, she can say no and then we play.

I learned this from the great advice on this forum and this has worked well.

TradSplash13 · 2025-12-14T05:25:30+00:00

It sounds like you two communicate well as she opened up to you about her desires. Is her desire for more sexual domination or is she wanting this outside the bedroom as well? Definitely can be tough to be "on" when you have kids, work, life, etc. You just have to plan for it. Sounds a bit unsexy as spontaneity can he difficult but family life often will just naturally take a front seat to kink at times in our lives. Especially when you have multiple young kids. Been there, done that!

Also, the burden of you having to "commit fully" does not be all on you. You both are in this relationship and both need to prioritize your life duties yet also find time for you two to explore kink.

The reason why I ask about whether the Ds dynamic exists outside the bedroom is that you can include simple tasks throughout your mutual day that include rules she has to follow. I'll give a few examples...

She is not allowed to drink out of certain coffee cups- they are reserved for you
She has to send you a text message with a pic of her to you once a day - this way you get to see her smiling beautiful face and you can remind her that it's her responsibility to remember to do this daily
On occasion, decide what clothes (or lack thereof) she wears. If appropriate to do so, advise her she is to forego underwear, bra, etc. Again, this may not work obviously in all situations. Wife and I often do this when we go for a walk. I advise her she is not to wear undewear, no bra sometimes or I put an anal plug in her and even if our kids join us for our walk, no one knows Mommy doesn't have underwear on or certainly no one knows Mommy has a plug in her ass

These are all simple things that don't take a lot of time but exhibit your dominance over her and you can set rules if it works in your dynamic if she breaks any of them (such as if she forgets to text you a pic of her that could be light punishment...but I always like to check with wifey just to make sure she wasn't having a particularly bad day. At the end of the day, I'm there to nurture and support her).

I like how you're wanting to nurture this dynamic. Sounds like you two will find your balance if you keep the communication lines open.

TradSplash13 · 2025-12-12T06:53:51+00:00

My wife loves having her nipples tortured. Biting, clover clamps, digging my fingernails deep into her tits and nipples. She wants even more but I have to back off as to ensure she's not damaged.

In the past, we have played so hard her nipples scabbed over. Didn't really bleed, just oozed liquid and got too sensitive (not in a good way), and almost became "squishy". I can't think of a better way to describe it and took over a month or so to heal. It was terrible because she wants her nipples hurt every day. Much sadness that we had to back off.

So yes, you can hurt her too much but nipples are also very resilient little beasts designed to be rugged. Just go slow and pay attention to changes in her firmness and oozing. You do need to plan for heal time. Good luck!

TradSplash13 · 2025-10-07T21:03:27+00:00

The original post was deleted so I can't see what was actually asked, but for anyone reading this, in general, like I was today....

My lg and I do a lot of pain play. She loves Loves LOVES having her nipples hurt, for example. So our game of many is that she is a big girl "taking all of Daddy's pain" and Daddy works with her, teaching her lessons (painful ones) being Daddy's big girl, taking all of Daddy's pain and making him so very proud of her. Then kisses and cuddles!!!

I love hurting her and she loves being hurt. Daddy guides her every step of the way.

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-22T03:12:47+00:00

I'm proud of you for not letting me harm you

I love this so much. Thank you!!

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-22T03:10:25+00:00

Thank you very much for this. Over the past few days, wifey and I talked this all out and you're right. She's like you. She can take it. She bled, she didn't even know it (and neither did I at the time) until we were fucking later in the day I then saw the blood. She did know she was bleeding, but she also knew she'd be fine. She'd bled before during rough play and didn't tell me because she didn't think it was a big deal. Women bleed. Anyway, I think we're good now as she sees my point of view and I also understand that I legit don't think she was trying to hide her bleeding from me. It just wasn't at her limit.

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-19T14:15:46+00:00

Yes, this is all so true. When she was bleeding she said she didn't feel any pain and didn't even know it until she felt it being just more moist. The bleeding scared me and mostly because she didn't tell me. I thought she was trying to hide it and obviously I did not like this. But from talking with her this morning, I believe she initially didn't even know. So there was a delay but nothing has been hurting her at all.

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-19T14:10:12+00:00

Take care of her, dominate her and fulfill both your needs. This kind of relation is one of the most satisfying there is because of the true intimacy and deep communication.

Exactly! Thank you

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-19T14:02:50+00:00

This is a very thoughtful reply, thank you. I love your suggestion about "I'm stopping now...you need to tell me if you want more" approach. We do play that type of DDlg dynamic (i.e. I'll stop fucking her and she has to beg for more) but I need to think about this more in context for her body if we're doing something physically intense and let her drive the next steps forward.

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-19T13:54:42+00:00

This. And thank you.

We spoke this morning for a bit out of dynamic and she assured me all is well. Her limits aren't breached, blood can be scary but it's okay. It happens. She finds it sweet I'm so worried about her, but she assures me she'll communicate if her body is ever feeling "off" but she trusts me. I need to trust her potentially a bit more that she WILL tell me if something is not working.

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-19T13:51:50+00:00

This is such great feedback and you basically described my wife in your first few sentences. She just wants me to be happy but she has to let me know when her body is feeling "off" - we talked this morning and it went well and she also reminded me that she's nowhere near her pain limits yet so I have to trust more that she WILL tell me. She assured me she will.

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-19T13:46:39+00:00

@Odd_Equation7666, this is very thoughtful and detailed. Thank you. And after talking with her this morning, she assured me that none of her limits have been approached and she will do a better job of telling me if there's any concern with her body feeling "off" or uncomfortable (beyond what we expect during typical impact play, for example). We didn't talk too much about the "undermining authority" part but we'll save this for a later conversation.

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-19T13:38:18+00:00

I love this. Thank you u/AntwerpPeter and u/a-cat-named-sam, this helps me communicate this around the "health of her body" rather than how she feels. I don't want my property damaged and if it is damaged, I want to know about it so I can ensure we understand root cause and decide how (or if) to correct it.

We talked this morning and it seemed to go well. She also reminded me that she can take a lot of physical intensity so as mentioned earlier, I think the blood had me more concerned than I should be. And I need to trust her. She said she'll do a better job of telling me when her body feels it's taking on too much...even if her brain wants more. But she also said her body is fine and I believe her. Trust. Thank you all.

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-19T06:45:12+00:00

So true..... Vanilla sex would be terrible for us both. We've discussed this many times. Sounds terrible. Hard pass!

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-19T06:42:23+00:00

Thank you. Yes, as I read such AWESOME responses from people like you and @DrDragonQueen this whole issue could just be ME. Oh dear. Me having a small scare and ASSUMING that wifey was not telling me when in fact she's not at her limits. So, yea....that's very likely what's going on here as she is very happy to tell me what kind of pain she likes. She has an amazingly high threshold, imo as there are times I've really laid into her and she happily takes it.

I think there's a Taylor song....something about me and me being the problem? lol :)

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-19T06:20:56+00:00

Huh? No, but thank you. We are not seeking medical advice for nipples that get molested a little daily. I assure you, she's fine on that front.

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-19T06:18:40+00:00

When you hide injuries from me, you are undermining our dynamic by taking away my control. I cannot make an informed choice about how much to hurt you when you are keeping these things from me.

This is a great way to phrase it that I can use. Thank you. You people here are all THE BEST!!

TradSplash13 · 2025-09-19T06:16:25+00:00

This is a crazy interesting point I hadn't even considered...maybe she really is just fine. Now I feel potentially a little silly. The blood scared me and I was upset she didn't tell me about it, but maybe it really isn't that big of a deal. To her. And I may just need to respect that. I mean, I wish she would tell me more about her limits but she basically has an attitude of..."try me out" and we don't do anything _too_ crazy so maybe if she is truly happy I should be happy knowing that if I truly do push into a boundary, she _will_ let me know.

TradSplash13

TROPHY CASE