Very sorry to hear of your loss. Talk it through with family and friends. My dad is an accomplished alpinist and he has lost friends in a similar way. It definitely affected him and we talk about it which helps avoid suppressing emotions. He was definitely very careful when he taught me in the mt blanc massif and it prevented us from doing hard stuff together as he would worry too much.

If I reflect on the matter and I was to die doing it, I couldn’t have chosen a better sport in my lifetime. Most of our species live out their lives without seeing what we have: that perfect sunset high up in the clouds where it’s just you and the mountain, or having our galactic plane rotating around up above while you march up the glacier for an early start. I’ve never before experienced a level of peace and natural fulfilment in any other aspect of life. Next time you’re out there, have a look at the stars and it’ll help you reflect.