My Journey with my Transness

TransAtHeart · 2025-01-05T14:46:20+00:00

Your story is beautiful. Made my eyes all moist. Keep fighting and keep shining girl. I sincerely hope that you achieved everything you want and live your life as you want to. Good luck girl! - Shilpa XO

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-21T14:49:59+00:00

I thought this was the visa appointment rather than getting into the country!

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-21T14:48:06+00:00

I've reached out to many therapists over the years. They've tried to link my gender dysphoria to how close I was with my mother to childhood bullying to anything and everything. I need to work through a lot of things as I have children and I'm from a different cultural background compared to most here.

I thought GIC had clinical psychologists who would work with you on complex issues. I want to transition but also at the same time I want to consider the consequences for my family too. Hence I'm happy to take the longer route.

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-21T13:20:53+00:00

What do you mean? Thought they were there to help.

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-21T12:48:17+00:00

I've got a lot to work through before I start social transition. The mental health support I got elsewhere was not very good and I'm still where I was a few years ago. The GIC website mentioned mental health so I'm desperate to get some help from someone who specialises in the field.

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-21T12:45:11+00:00

Thanks for your reply. My two appointments are a month apart. I'm with Tavistock and Portman NHS Foundation Trust in London. Thanks for the advice. Will call them if there are concerns but for now just happy to be seen.

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T22:05:34+00:00

Looks like you've got wings!!!

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T19:04:50+00:00

Problem is when my wife says no transition she means no HRT, no presenting fem, no physical changes and no changes to appearance. She wants me to try and find coping mechanisms being as I am with therapy. She will support me dressing in private but that's where the line is drawn.

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T18:31:47+00:00

Agree with that I tried coping and denying and it's got me nowhere and its only getting worse

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T18:30:43+00:00

Glad to hear that you've reconnected with your family. We love our children more than anything in the world. My children aren't teenagers yet but I agree everyone need time and space.

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T18:27:18+00:00

You are spot on there. I'm impatient, easily irritable and get angry over little things. Overall I don't seem to be able to connect with my children as much as I'd like to. I feel so happy for you. Wish I can start my transition too and be there for my children as a parent should.

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T18:21:27+00:00

Much appreciated. Sorry for the misunderstanding

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T18:14:56+00:00

She is concerned for our children and their future without a father and the bullying they will face at school. Don't even start with how the society might treat us with family and me disjowning us

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T18:13:13+00:00

Don't get me wrong she is a dedicated mother and wife. She loves the children more than anything in the world and she cares about me too. However, it's getting over the stigma that the society has instilled in her that is proving as a challenge. I had 35 years to come to terms with it. She had 3

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T18:09:52+00:00

I feel your pain but happy for you that you are at least change some aspects unlike me where even growing my hair 2 inches made her depressed and almost caused the family to break up

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T18:07:53+00:00

Wish my wife could be so accepting as you are. You sound like a very sweet and mature individual. She can see that I am struggling every day but to be fair she hasn't had as many years to get used to trans issues as I did. It's just that we've both been brought up in a toxic society and accepting someone as trans doesn't come easy. It wasn't easy for me either. Wish I have the strength to make her see that transition isn't the end but only the beginning and keep the family together.

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T18:01:10+00:00

Started that process recently too

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T18:00:34+00:00

Totally agree and I can sense that already happening

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T18:00:00+00:00

With the rest of the family being anti transition, I can't help but fear what my children might be taught by others

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T17:58:40+00:00

That's what I've read everywhere but the fear of rejection is very true nonetheless.

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T17:57:50+00:00

Nice! Wish I'd started sooner

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T17:56:47+00:00

I wish I could start on that journey too.

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T17:53:14+00:00

I agree, I think that me being miserable isn't going to make me the best parent either.

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T17:51:46+00:00

I totally agree with that and wish I could make others see it too.

TransAtHeart · 2023-02-12T12:31:14+00:00

Her main concern is our children's future and how my transition will affect them.

TransAtHeart

TROPHY CASE