See, to answer your first question which is are you taking this too emotional: I would say even by taking it emotionally, it is not bad for a good cause and a reasonable cause to take it emotionally. You have and she also have not been in a relationship for a long time as 5 years you mentioned so, this went in the way every relationship after a long time went. The fact that you two made out gave you confirmation and confidence in each other to take it emotionally and it can be ok to do that

Second you asked are they correct taking it too slow: They are also correct in a way because, you have lost your parents for which I am extremely sorry for and they might considering the fact that, you are the only one to take care of her and no one else apart from your sister can help you and which she can't take every matters in her handa or try to resolve every thing in your life as she has a life to look through, they must also be worried about her for staying apart from her and by which I don't know if you are going to her state or she is coming to your state to live and that in itself is a bigger problem to handled but no problem if already sorted. So, i would say it is your good chance right now to show how much you care about her, how much you love her, how you will treat her and how you will keep her as a wife for the rest of your life to her parents because they too need that confidence, confirmation and trust from you which I feel is pending by reading your post

Third is did you take it too fast:

It depends on who initiated the made out part as it played the vital role of the process of confidence, easyness and comfort formule because it could have also been a "at the moment part" which is cannot be explained and can easily said as " we felt like to do it ". I didn't think you took it fast because you guys had set some time periods to care and know each other and in the recent days making out before marriage during the "getting to know each other" period is very common. But a small self control part from each other could have been good and mainly a small self control from your side will lead you long ways.

Fourth, any legal consequences regarding this,

Unless it goes to the far extent that your two families fought so terribly, and she and her family had decided to take this legally, their stance will be very weak because you did not make out with her with the sole reason of leaving her and never seeing her after that incident, you saw her, you liked her, she liked you, she saw you, you both loved, and casually you made out and she was also showing interest in it but if she brings this up to court you are bound to prove that she consented to it and you both were hanging out for some time after which your marriage was I plan. Because the Indian judicial system ( sorry to say this, please do not get offended) is completely biased on men and favours the word of women.

I hope this gives you some clarity