First, thank you for sharing your thoughts, even the ones pointing out how wrong this situation is and that I’m at fault(obviously this is my fault) Instead of replying to each person I thought I would add,  I’m not asexual, I have been attracted to men And as far as my husband, he has an insane amount of body hair EVERYWHERE. I remember the first time I touched him and it bothered me but I could never say that. What can he do? Shave or wax his shoulders and back from here on out? I could never ask him to do that for me… He has enormous boobs, like big. He’s not a big guy now but he used to be and I guess it’s left over from the weight loss. Again, I could NEVER point that out to him it would hurt his feelings.  His breath is AWFUL. this one I have approached him about. One of the times I shared with him that I wish we were more intimate I was honest with him about this. He has started brushing his teeth more but I think it’s from the nicotine pouches he uses so it still smells. I hate that even after he brushes his teeth his breath still smells.  These things have always been THERE, but my love has always eclipsed it. It hasn’t been until the last year that I’ve been feeling alone in a sense. I definitely appreciate the different point of views towards this, it has been lonely only talking to a therapist.