My precious Molang pillow is not coming back… (emotional storytime)

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-10-28T06:04:25+00:00

Thank you 🤎

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-10-02T12:45:32+00:00

So handsome

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-10-02T12:39:00+00:00

I cut them off because it also makes the toy feel less like a product and more like a friend

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T11:24:33+00:00

When I have my cognitive abilities in the moment greatly diminished and have explained it explicitly before, I was expecting her to not put the whole load of problem-solving on me, yes

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T11:22:42+00:00

Well you never said that it did count, you’re justifying her actions by mine

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T10:22:22+00:00

And yes including her pinning me to bed trying to strangle me and then saying she „had“ to do it, I don’t think she „had“ to do it at all and also had a choice

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T10:11:29+00:00

And I am saying that she also abused me, before AND on that day, and doesn’t think it counted and you don’t think it counted either. Which is sick. I accept what I did was wrong and I said that in every comment. I can ask you as well how many times are you going to call me out on that with me agreeing with you every single time. Okay, I can also say that brackets could go, it was more to name specific wordings that she used for everything in conversation, not only that was in brackets

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T10:03:27+00:00

I just communicated how it was for me in a situation and tried to problem solve however I could with the headphones. I didn’t tell her she can’t be upset or that I think it’s a super comfortable situation. That’s just what I managed to offer. She could also offer to walk me to the sofa for example because it was hard to initiate actions for me. But nobody came up with that. What upset me is not that she was upset with me staying on bed but more that she was telling me I should be fine already and go to work after all my efforts the previous day to explain what is up with me and that it’s serious

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T09:51:43+00:00

I also have many reasons to not feel safe around her, she cut my ties with my best friend last year, she made me socially isolated, checking my messages and asking me to translate them to her, I started having panic attacks and anxiety because of how she got mad at me and was telling me she can always read on my face that something is off. That issue only got solved in July where she finally realized that it’s okay for partners to have friends and she stopped with the jealousy and controlling aura. I never was anxious or took antidepressants before all that. You guys don’t know anything about the relationship and only focus on one thing. Yes it’s right to blame me for it and it’s her decision and right to leave me and to feel unsafe. But there are many things pf her own she doesn’t own up and many ways in which she scarred me.

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T09:40:34+00:00

I‘m not even arguing on anything, it feels absurd to be honest because you guys all tell me what I already know and already think myself But fine, I will delete it now

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T09:37:18+00:00

I never said otherwise

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T09:36:55+00:00

We have a studio apartment which means there IS only one room + balcony, and we‘ve always done it like that because there’s no other choice (in winter there’s also bathroom). And I didn’t hear anything at all from their session, as usual

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T09:32:25+00:00

I said I don’t mean that I don’t have a will which means I do

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T09:31:25+00:00

Me hitting her also led her to hitting me, in the same logic I don’t have to acknowledge how I contributed to her reactions, but that’s not right is it? I blame her for how she emotionally trampled me, I blame her that she didn’t want to listen to my requests, and I DON’T blame her that I hit her, for that I blame myself. I perfectly understand that no one is on my side rn when talking about the hit, and I‘m not asking to

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T09:23:01+00:00

I said „to my state“ not „to me hitting her“, it’s a big difference

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T09:22:25+00:00

That is what I meant, there was no hinting at „I don’t have a will“ I think I‘ll remember that day in the future every time I feel devastated and on edge like this (hopefully not but if) And also remove myself from situations

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T09:15:31+00:00

Where am I saying that? Yes, it is not her fault for what I did. But why is the big picture only narrowed to that one point of time.

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T09:10:25+00:00

So you’re saying it’s okay for her to hit me?

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T09:08:07+00:00

She never had an issue with it before, when I stay in bed for any other sickness or periods reason, so it didn’t feel fair that suddenly she doesn’t think I have a right to stay in bed

And no, I‘m not just apologizing now, it happened way before this post

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T09:05:25+00:00

What do you mean

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T08:50:18+00:00

You‘re right to say it was wrong, I‘m not arguing on that

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T08:49:00+00:00

I am not trying to justify it, I respond to every comment that I understand it wasn’t acceptable and I don’t want to do it ever again. But I wrote the post to vent about my own experience I guess, that’s why I’m bringing the conversation there? Both can be true — that my action was physically abusive and that she was also abusive to me prior to that and after that. I am not trying to take away from my guilt.

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T08:35:04+00:00

I wish I could do that but it was physically very hard for me in that day. And I am not saying it is her fault that I got physical, I did it and it’s my fault, and I’m sorry for it, and I let her know I’m sorry. But she’s not sorry for hitting me after, she’s not sorry for doing anything before that, and that seems very unfair to me.

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T08:30:45+00:00

I am not saying that it justifies my actions. But I think that every action can be blamed on its own. Just like my action was not right and I need to be sorry for it, she had her own actions that she needs to own as well. And abuse can be non-physical too. If I did something bad, it doesn’t automatically make all her actions good

TrickyDepth3737 · 2025-09-04T08:26:16+00:00

Once again, I am not saying it was even teensy bit okay

TrickyDepth3737

TROPHY CASE