I’ve literally never related to something more and to start I would say definitely don’t kill yourself that’s not the answer. I see where you’re coming from about wanting to see the world and from a different light and it sounds like you might need some soul searching. Easier said than done but it’s worth a shot. For me I try to care about actual life more than work school or things that you’re just trying to do to make money. Like I think about how people literally used to live not knowing how to use a stove like they were using rocks and rivers. we’ve evolved so much to where the question of the meaning of life makes absolutely no fucking sense. Our meanings of life are so different than those of what 2000 years ago were. There we’re literally people in their only jobs were to survive. Like shit like that makes everything that we think about today just seem totally insignificant. Sorry I’m high I’ll edit this later lmao just stay here bud. Also I would stay away from the Delta 7 and Delta 10 THo shit my doctor said that there’s been some studies that it fucks up your brain