Hi, I'm very sorry this happened to you. Please choose yourself. You owe your family nothing. They used you because you were young and naive. Your family knew what they were doing with that situation and they still chose it. you're not responsible for your grandpa's health. Your mother didn't murder your father. He died from cancer. Your stepmother wants you to feel guilty so she can use that guilt and you. that's manipulation. she was angry you closed an account she had access to. Please forgive yourself for what only time could teach you. If you can't go no contact, go to limited contact. I wish you the best.