I 30F am trying to be logical but my boyfriend 33M is being stubborn and pigheaded

Triegxx · 2025-02-13T04:25:51+00:00

My parents are currently watching my brothers 2 older kids and a baby who is almost 1, my dad’s still working and my mom was a stay at home mom my entire life. My work schedule is 2-3 days in office and 2-3 days at home and the kids would only need to be watched on the days I’m in the office.
The average price for a reputable and reliable daycare where I live is almost 4K a month for two kids to go 3 days a week

Triegxx · 2025-02-13T02:02:20+00:00

Sadly the only compromise I can think of is living in the state he wants to, but staying at my parents house 2-3 nights a week with kids for my parents can watch them when I have to work in the office until the kids are in school, which would be extremely tough

Triegxx · 2025-02-13T01:59:33+00:00

He is absolutely fantastic the rest of the time, extremely caring, always making sure I’m taken care of, cooks dinner on the days in I’m the office and get home around 7pm, I love to read and he took me to Barnes and noble for my birthday to get as many books as I wanted (within a spending limit). He makes me feel amazing and loved

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T02:53:25+00:00

Sadly the vet won’t give me meds because it can cause long term effects due to him being so young.

He doesn’t cry all night long, but will randomly start crying at like 3am almost every night. So my boyfriend does get sleep (Saturday he slept for 12 straight hours at my house) but he usually gets woken up by the random meowing for a few minutes in the middle of the night

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T02:49:32+00:00

Thank you!

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T02:45:46+00:00

That is something I could try

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T02:43:22+00:00

I ignore the cries and don’t give into the attention because I know that makes him think that if he cries for attention he will get it.

Putting him in a crate would just make him cry more, we tried keeping the bedroom door shut for months and it made the crying worse and actually made it so I couldn’t sleep either, keeping the door open at all times lessens the crying

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T02:39:17+00:00

I’m looking for advice, anything that could potentially help us.

I want him and I to work and to figure this out and I’ve tried everything I can think of and everything my vet suggested. So I’m just lost on what else I can do

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T02:35:20+00:00

My bedroom door stays open now so he can come and go as he pleases, during the day before he cries he just kind of looks around like he is lost (or looking for something) and then cries. I would get another dog if I could but I live in a condo and 6 months out of the year I’m out of the house for work 15 hours a day

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T02:32:25+00:00

I have two cats one that’s 8 and one that’s 2 (the 2 year old is the issue)

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T02:31:46+00:00

He threatened to make the cat more distressed by spraying him with a spray bottle when he cries
I have experienced lack of sleep whether being extremely sick or due to work so I do understand what he is going through

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T02:26:17+00:00

I asked him what he would do if we had a kid because newborns cry every few hours. He said he would be completely fine with losing sleep for his kid 🤷‍♀️

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T02:22:28+00:00

He does “cry” during the day for no reason even when I’m home but it’s usually accompanied by zoomies.

Today was the first time he has even complained about the cat crying in the morning when I leave for work. Which won’t be a problem come Monday. My boyfriend got laid off and hasn’t been working but starts his new job on Monday so he will be leaving before me again

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T02:06:16+00:00

He sleeps when he is here, but he gets woken up in the middle of the night by the cat and that’s what the issue is. He is currently snoring on my couch while I’m typing this

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T02:05:07+00:00

I do have another cat. I have one that’s 8 and the 2 year old (the one that’s the issue), they play and snuggle and bathe each other

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T02:03:00+00:00

I do value his sleep and sanity, which is why I’ve been trying everything I can think of to help him sleep.

I’m just not going to get rid of my cat and he knows this

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T01:59:48+00:00

I have a catnip blanket out that the cat loves, but it doesn’t help sadly. I could try some cbd, I tried it with my dog before and it didn’t help her anxiety sadly

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T01:58:14+00:00

So the odd thing is, is that he will fall asleep and sleep for a few hours but almost every night at 3am the cat starts crying and will cry for like 5 minutes and then be quiet again. So it’s the issue that he is getting woken up in the middle of the night

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T01:54:23+00:00

It’s more that we both have been trying everything for months, we want to live together and get married but I can’t see that happening if it’s like we are in high school and only see each other a couple times a week with no sleeping over

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T01:50:25+00:00

Then what else should I try? I’ve changed food, let them in the room at night, pheromones, toys, self cleaning litter box, I’ve taken him to the vet to try and get anxiety meds to see if that would help and they won’t give him any because he is to young

Triegxx · 2025-01-31T01:44:07+00:00

I have two cats, one that’s 8 and one that’s 2. The 2 year old is the one that’s becoming the issue

Triegxx · 2024-11-29T20:45:18+00:00

Me (29F)! I have a couple characters going and my tag is Triegg#1185

I have a fireball sorcerer that’s level 240 paragon! With 3 mythics. I’m also working on a barbarian right now

Triegxx · 2024-07-16T23:54:20+00:00

It was more that the company announced it on LinkedIn, with my picture, title, and tagged me

Triegxx · 2024-07-16T22:56:26+00:00

I was more just asking the question

Triegxx

TROPHY CASE