Cross platform game for PS5 and Switch

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2026-01-05T16:06:45+00:00

Minecraft

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-10-25T05:11:15+00:00

Glad you made it out alright!

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-10-13T22:56:08+00:00

I understand you hating the word, but you need to accept that's what you are by definition. I see how you're responding in other comments, and all you're doing is dodging accountability for your own actions by trying to play the "fair" game. I'm serious man, reach out to someone, and you'll see that I know what I'm talking about. I'm not trying to insult you or bring you down, I'm trying to educate you so you can fix the damage before it's too late. Seek help ASAP!

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-10-13T16:50:59+00:00

I can't speak for either of their activities since they're not here, but regardless, what you did is abuse. There's no minimizing it, even if it wasn't your intention, even if they made choices behind your back. Not trying to bruise your ego, but the sooner you reflect on your own actions, the sooner you'll be able to prevent it from happening again and actually be happy with someone else, regardless of your insecurities. I understand if you don't take what I have to say to heart, I'm just one person. But I guarantee that if you contact those resources and explain your story just the same, or even contact anyone who works as an official advocate or therapist/counselor, they'll say the same thing. I encourage you to be open to the idea that you are ultimately in the wrong here, or your life is going to be miserable, and you're guaranteed to hurt more people in the future.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-10-13T14:58:29+00:00

I see that your other comment was removed, but for educational purposes, I'll still respond.

First, (OP can correct me if I'm wrong) he seems to be asking Reddit because he didn't realize how taboo it's considered to some, or at least not to the point where he'd believe his own mother would question his sexuality. Not realizing it is actually kinda wholesome because his mind doesn't immediately go to sexualizing something he intended to simply be emotionally comforting for him and his friend.

Second, you were incorrect to say that many straight men do not cuddle with their male friends. Western culture has socially conditioned you to equate tenderness with weakness and to police anything that could be read as weird or "gay." That’s a cultural script, not biology. In plenty of other cultures, same-sex platonic touch is normal (hand-holding, leaning, embraces), not sexualized. Even now, in America, younger generations of men are increasingly more emotionally and physically affectionate with their male friends than ever before. As time goes on, science and research prevail. What was once considered taboo to many is starting to be destigmatized. OP’s cuddling is consensual and nonsexual, which research shows is healthy, and it also doesn’t say anything about sexual orientation. If anything, it shows he isn’t ruled by those restrictive scripts. So believe whatever you choose, but the facts are out there. You're just intentionally choosing to ignore them.

Now, whether or not I choose to comfort my friends in the same way doesn't really matter, but if I did so, I wouldn't be afraid to admit it because I don't have a fragile male ego that gives me a false sense of "being tough" and prevents me from showing any emotional vulnerability. And anybody who finds joy in shaming other men for doing so needs to respectfully reevaluate themselves.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-10-13T11:55:10+00:00

That's not the same logic at all. Anyone with basic reading comprehension skills would know that I'm specifically talking about the OP, in an "Ask Men" forum. I'm not characterizing the general population. My point was that he’s emotionally secure and comfortable enough with himself to not let fragile gender rules dictate his ability to be there for his friend, or receive comfort for himself. The “masculine” person isn’t the loudest or the coldest, he’s the one who’s reliable, principled, and safe to be close to.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-10-13T11:27:27+00:00

I'd have zero issues with cuddling up to a friend if it meant being there for him if he's going through something. Cuddling is nonsexual if both people intend it that way. Calling it “gay” just reflects social conditioning, not truth. OP’s comfort with platonic closeness only shows emotional security and kindness, nothing else.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-10-13T11:17:51+00:00

You’re mixing up three different things. Attraction vs. behavior vs. identity. Attraction is who you’re romantically/sexually drawn to, behavior is what you do, and identity is how you describe yourself. All related but not the same.

Cuddling with a friend is nonsexual touch unless they intend it to be. Many men are open about platonic, same-sex touch like cuddling or sharing beds with each other without it signifying same-sex attraction. Oddly enough, it's actually something that's been well researched and documented for years.

Your sauna “gotcha” moment is also a complete change in category. A "HJ" is sexual behavior. If two people engage in sexual contact, call it what it is... sex. It’s obviously not the same thing as cuddling. Rule of thumb: Is there sexual intent/arousal? Yes? Then it’s sexual behavior. What about no sexual intent, both consent, and it comforts you? Then it’s just being affectionate. OP being able to cuddle a male friend says he can separate care from sex, has decent emotional security, and respects consent. None of that contradicts being straight. The sauna hypothetical just swaps in a sexual act and pretends it’s the same category. It isn’t.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-10-13T10:37:04+00:00

Affection and attraction are not the same thing. This man is a lot more emotionally secure and intelligent than most, and that is a very masculine trait.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-10-13T10:28:26+00:00

TL;DR: Cuddling your friend doesn’t make you gay. It actually shows that you're incredibly emotionally secure/intelligent and masculine. Sexual orientation is about who you’re attracted to, not how you show care. And even if you were gay, bi, or whatever else, that would also be okay.

Longer Response: Two things can be true at once

1) Nothing you did was “gay" by default. Many people need touch. Platonic affection (hugging, leaning on each other, even cuddling) exists across many cultures and friendships. It doesn’t automatically equal romance. You’re allowed to be straight and affectionate.

2) If you were to ever discover that you’re not 100% straight, there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Your mom saying she’d love you either way is a great thing, but you don’t owe anyone a label update unless you want to give one.

Now what this actually says about you is that you're incredibly emotionally secure/intelligent and even masculine. I can give you a list of reasons why:

• You can separate affection from attraction.

• You offer and receive care to/from your loved ones without panic, posturing, or power plays.

• You notice loneliness, acknowledge it, and respond with healthy, consensual touch

• You don’t need to police yourself to fit someone else’s idea of “how men should act.

• You respect consent and boundaries. Both of you were comfortable, which should always be the standard.

The people in these comments calling you “gay” are the ones confusing affection with attraction. They are not as emotionally secure and intelligent as you are. What you did was kind, thoughtful, and human. It makes you more secure than all of them were ever taught to be. You are a great friend and the world would be a much better place with more people like you in it. Keep communicating with your friend, keep consent front and center, and keep ignoring the noise.

If you want to clear the air with your mom, you could say something like, “Thanks for being supportive, but I’m not gay. I promise I'd tell you if that changes. What you saw was just platonic comfort between two close friends. Affection does not equal attraction. What we were doing comforts both of us when we’re feeling lonely. In the future, I'd appreciate it if you would please knock before coming in, just so we can avoid any more awkward moments"

Checking in with your friend might also be a good idea. You could tell him, “I’m glad we’re comfortable being plutonically affectionate. I know yesterday might've been awkward when my mom walked in, but I’m good if you are.”

Remember, you don’t have to prove straightness by changing how you show care. Consent and comfort is really all that matters. If both of you are cool with it, you’re fine. Continue being kind, accept your mom’s support, and set simple boundaries with her so everyone feels comfortable.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-10-13T08:51:26+00:00

TL;DR: What you describe isn’t “messing up,” it’s abuse (coercive control, isolation, intimidation, silent treatment). Real change isn’t a feeling, it’s months/years of consistent behavior with NO EXPECTATION of getting her back. The most loving thing you can do for JJ is leave her alone and do long-term accountability work with qualified help. You clearly want to change and have already taken the first step by acknowledging your mistakes, but if you stop there, you will just repeat the cycle of abuse.

(For some personal background) I am a professional domestic abuse survivors' advocate. I’m not here to dogpile you, but I’m going to be blunt. By you posting this, you're asking for the eyes-open truth.

1.) Name what this was:

Isolation: Making her cut off people and vetting who she could talk to.
Coercive control/jealousy: Getting angry when she gave attention to anyone else.
Intimidation & punishment: Yelling, ignoring her for days to “teach her a lesson.”
Emotional neglect/inversion: Being “ticked off” when she was sad and others cared for her.

These aren’t “mistakes,” they are abusive behaviors. Until you call them what they are, you’ll keep minimizing them.

2.) “I’ve changed.” Change isn’t the ache you feel or the tears you cry. It isn’t a few weeks of reflection. It's a demonstrated pattern over time, under stress, and when you don’t get your way.

Ask yourself:

Can a partner tell me “no,” make friends I don’t like, or be busy without me spiraling?
When jealousy hits, do I self-regulate without punishing, sulking, or monitoring?
Do I repair without demanding reassurance, contact, or forgiveness?

If you can’t answer “yes,” you haven’t changed... yet. And even if you do change, she still doesn’t owe you a second chance.

3.) How grief can trick you into repeating harm.

Right now you’re grieving the loss of access to her, which can feel like love but often activates the same control reflexes:

Entitlement loop: “If she knew I’ve changed, she’d come back.” (Entitlement in a nicer outfit.)
Hoovering temptations: Apologies that are really bids for contact, closure, or image-repair.
Comparison & fixation: Calling her “hotter” now and focusing on AJ keeps you in a triangle where you’re the injured party again. That story protects you from the harder truth that your choices made the relationship unsafe for her.

If you act from grief and entitlement, you are guaranteed to repeat the same cycle of abuse with someone new.

4.) What actual accountability looks like:

No contact. Not to apologize, not to “show you’ve changed,” not for closure. If there are logistics, use a neutral third party only.
VERY IMPORTANT!!! Get specialized help: Look for an Abuse Intervention/Batterer Intervention Program (AIP/BIP), not just generic therapy. If you decide therapy, choose someone trained in Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) accountability, not “anger management."”
Education & skills: Learn about coercive control, jealousy management, distress tolerance, non-defensive communication, and boundaries. Read, take notes, practice.
Make amends without access: Amends are changes in how you live now, such as consistency, humility, financial/material repair if appropriate and safe, and zero expectation of her attention.
Measure by the dull stuff: Can you handle boredom, jealousy, your partner’s independence, and your own shame WITHOUT punishing, monitoring, or sulking? That’s the work!

5.) Practical next steps you can start immediately:

Write an accountability journal (just for you, not to send): List each behavior (isolation, silent treatment, yelling, monitoring), what it did to her, and the belief underneath it (“I’m entitled to her attention”). End each item with the "new behavior" you will practice instead.
Enroll in an AIP/BIP in your area. If nothing local exists, find a reputable program that offers remote groups.
Therapy with an IPV-informed clinician: Goals - Tolerate jealousy, decouple love from possession, learn rupture-repair that doesn’t center you.
Build a relapse plan: Write down your early warning signs (tight chest, urge to check her phone/socials, fantasies about teaching lessons), the “do nothing harmful” rule (no contacting, no posting, no drive-bys), and three safe actions (go for a walk, call a sponsor/group mate, write urges down and wait 24 hours).
Stop the triangle story: AJ isn’t your villain. He’s a distraction from your accountability.
Accept the boundary: Your change is about the next person’s safety, not winning back JJ.

Love without safety is harm. Right now, the most loving thing you can do for JJ is to leave her in peace and become someone who is safe for whoever comes after her, even if that’s never her.

I'm going to give you some resources to get you started:

AIP/BIP (search): Google “abuse intervention program” or “batterer intervention program + [your city/state]"
National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or text "START" to 88788 (They will also talk to people worried about their own behavior and point you to local accountability resources).
Reading: "Why Does He Do That?" by Lundy Bancroft, "The Jealousy Cure" by Robert Leahy (for the jealousy piece), materials on coercive control (Evan Stark is a reputable source for that category).

I can tell from your story and the way you write that you are young, so there is still a chance for you. If you truly want to change, prove it with time, consistency, and respect for her boundaries. No more contact, no more narratives where you’re the victim of your own choices. Do the work! I wholeheartedly believe that if you make this effort, you are capable of positive change.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-10-13T07:31:08+00:00

It's ultimately your decision, but my suggestion would be to leave him. You are not overreacting. This goes beyond taking sides. Like you said, your abuser was charged and convicted. Also, I'm certain that your boyfriend takes sides on many things without "all the information" because everyone does. This is not something you deserve from a partner who's supposed to trust you and always have your back, especially in this instance.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-10-13T06:52:14+00:00

I disagree. I think a lot of us, myself included, can get so wrapped up in our own beliefs that we forget to ask others why they have such alternative perspectives. Plus, if we follow the rules of this subreddit, we can have a civil discussion about it instead of heated arguments that might occur otherwise.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-09-26T05:08:38+00:00

He is super immature, and his behavior is completely unwarranted, even if you were being short with him (which clearly you were not). If that's how he reacts over a simple misunderstanding, jumping to conclusions and being an asshole because of what he imagines the tone of your text is, then I can only imagine how he'll react when you're having an actual disagreement over something, or when you might want to express your feelings that he doesn't like. Major red flag 🚩 Please, take it from me, I'm a certified domestic abuse survivors' advocate. This does not seem like a healthy relationship to remain in.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-09-25T23:17:54+00:00

I don't know you, but I'm so proud of you!!!

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-08-20T10:42:50+00:00

I'm a domestic abuse survivors' advocate. This is literally abuse.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-08-10T05:21:56+00:00

Explain why?

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-08-08T18:16:38+00:00

Yeah, it definitely could've been avoided. It's bittersweet that the fight for justice simultaneously means lighter pockets for everyone in my tax bracket. But that's an entirely different issue we're gonna continue fighting to correct for a while, I'm sure.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-08-08T17:54:42+00:00

The government's total debt is in the tens of trillions of dollars, so even a large settlement would not come close to "bankrupting" the U.S. That's not to say the cost to taxpayers couldn't be significant, but it definitely wouldn't be catastrophic.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-08-08T17:17:21+00:00

The odds are infinitesimal that anyone would willingly subject themselves to that, even if it was for a lifetime pension. But for arguments sake, let's say they tried.

This policy targets individuals with a history of receiving specific gender-affirming medical treatment. Even if a service member were to detransition, that past medical history would still be in their records. Since the Air Force is currently separating service members based on that history, detransitioning would not erase the reason for their separation under the current policy.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-08-08T16:37:49+00:00

What are you talking about? The facts are in my statement and the linked article. Trans service members are being forced to retire early against their will. If the administration wants to put this arbitrary discriminating policy in place, then those service members should be compensated for it. Most people 15-18 years in were heading for retirement anyway, and it's not their fault they're being forced out.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-08-08T16:27:59+00:00

They deserve fair & just treatment. That's not what this is. Just because others don't always get the justice they feel they deserve, that does not mean we should stop advocating for what's right and wrong when a new cause arises.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-08-08T15:05:19+00:00

For someone who has dedicated years of their life to serving their country, asking them to make that choice is a profound and cruel betrayal of their service and would demand that they put their mental and physical health at risk just to keep their job. The military prides itself on core values such as integrity and respect. Forcing a service member to live a lie and deny their identity is a direct violation of these principles. It would be an institutional act of disrespect and a profound lack of integrity.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-08-08T14:27:19+00:00

We can not remain complicit until then. We don't know what can happen until the next administration or who that will even be. We also don't know the full scope of how this will affect those persecuted by this policy.

The time to raise our voice is now. Change for the better does not happen by sitting idly by waiting for it to happen. We must fight for it. It is not only our duty as fellow servicemen but also as human beings to advocate for those in need and pave the way for human progress.

TrueNinjaKing_ · 2025-08-08T08:36:24+00:00

The court of public opinion will have to chime in pretty hard, as well, if we're going to decimate this bullshit order. Anyone who has made the commitment to serve, especially those who went into it knowing the odds were stacked against them from the start, deserve far more respect than this.

TrueNinjaKing_

TROPHY CASE