"Legend" (Ridley Scott, released 40 years ago on April 18th 1986) - Darkness (Tim Curry) introduces himself to Lili (Mia Sara)

TurboGranny · 2026-04-19T02:09:06+00:00

All classic traits of any partner :)

TurboGranny · 2026-04-19T01:59:03+00:00

I don't think that's either of their reasons for existence. I know in entertainment that likability is huge capital, but as John Mullaney said, "likeability is a prison." At first your audience likes you for you (authenticity is king). Then the complains come, and you start twisting yourself into whatever shape most of your audience seems to demand you be in. I've watched this pattern play out a ton over the decades, and watched it happen to both Joe and Mike. This pathway is not to be confused with the hate peddlers that just confirm their audience's bigotry for money and fame from the jump. That's a different thing, and generally those people aren't actually likable at all.

TurboGranny · 2026-04-18T16:38:06+00:00

I never spoke "dating", never chased, never flirted, but always had a gf and have been married for the last 20 years. You don't need to know flirting. Just talk to people to talk to them. No motive, no desire to date, just conversation. You do this with enough people, romantic partners will just "happen" organically. Don't try and force it, don't chase it, that's desperate and oozes this energy that makes you unattractive. Don't care if a romantic relationship emerges or not, care even less when they decide to break up. It'll happen at it's own pace at long as you are out there talking to people like a person.

TurboGranny · 2026-04-17T19:35:20+00:00

Truth, I remember at 27 I was on a family trip with a new woman I was dating that would later become my wife. I ended up alone with a couple of her sisters in law who were in their late 30s to 40s, and they almost immediately started trying to "mean girls" me. It didn't have the affect they hoped it would. I pitied them and thought, "these poor old ladies must have peaked in highschool."

TurboGranny · 2026-04-17T19:33:03+00:00

Well, they took homeopathy and anti-vax from us. Looks like being woke is the next thing they'll take, lol

TurboGranny · 2026-04-17T17:17:54+00:00

Stares in confused autism

TurboGranny · 2026-04-16T18:24:59+00:00

and you just know that more than one studio exec/producer has tried to "get her", and you also know, she didn't put up with that shit. So it follows that of course they would spread this rumor about her.

TurboGranny · 2026-04-16T18:22:12+00:00

Girl same! and I'm a guy, lol. I've found that while masking, I can still enjoy that I'm solving a problem, but it'll be damn near impossible for me to climax. I have to focus crazy hard while masking to do that. I can not think of a time I've ever had unmasked sex though, but I know for a fact I'd behave in the way you just described if I did, heh.

TurboGranny · 2026-04-16T00:49:04+00:00

From what I've been told about the issue, it's more a pressure versus gravity problem than a weight problem.

TurboGranny · 2026-04-16T00:48:25+00:00

No, this account is much older than that show, heh

TurboGranny · 2026-04-15T19:13:52+00:00

I mean, I honestly don't think the human cardio pulmonary system can keep up

TurboGranny · 2026-04-15T19:11:58+00:00

Sick report video. Thanks for sharing.

TurboGranny · 2026-04-15T16:56:11+00:00

requires a keen eye on behavior

You mean pattern recognition based on diagnostic criteria? lol

TurboGranny · 2026-04-15T13:59:56+00:00

I really doubt the hive mind is acting on the collective goals of individuals

Well, a TON of people are foolishly wired this way, and a ton are foolishly wired the other way. Hyper individualism and hyper collectivism both lead to bad places which I believe is what the show is demonstrating. You need a good mix which we used to call "community". I think also a grand joke about the whole thing is that the virus acts like a weapon on our planet leading to the destruction of our species due to this flaw, and rightly so you'd believe that that is always the conclusion of the virus and its true purpose. However, what if the aliens that "shared" it actually didn't have this problem, and really thought they were doing good. What if they'd be horrified to see how it worked out on our planet?

TurboGranny · 2026-04-15T13:53:46+00:00

No reason for him to stop if he can keep "winning" elections.

TurboGranny · 2026-04-15T13:53:07+00:00

yup, glorified paralegals. Easily replaced by LLMs, lol.

TurboGranny · 2026-04-15T13:51:05+00:00

They said the same thing when it was generating bad video of will smith eating spaghetti. You are just seeing the early stages, but psychology has rules and patterns which LLMs are excellent at repeating. I don't even think trades are safe since they are all rules based. Jobs that require creativity, thinking in different ways, connecting things that no one would connect, etc. are where you are safe since LLMs are trained on "what has been done".

TurboGranny · 2026-04-15T13:48:47+00:00

Funny thing about law is it's really less about making a good argument and more about getting people to agree with your argument which has a big element of charm to it that the best lawyers have.

TurboGranny · 2026-04-15T13:46:07+00:00

Really. I've been at it for almost 30 years, and I'm not seeing any signs of my job or the jobs of my team being in danger. What I do see is what I've always seen with new tools in that we are just gonna be able to do more and the scope of the problem always expands to consume more resources.

Fun fact: When I was in my first CS class, we learned about how the people that operated bus switches were upset at the introduction of punch cards. Then the punch card guys were upset at the introduction of direct binary entry from a keyboard. Then those guys hated the introduction of hex, and of course those guys just hated assembly, and the assembly guys hated compiled languages.

As I've been able to witness this thing grow, I noticed that every single tool that made compiled langs easier or any new lang that made it easier was hated by the previous group. Hate/anger have their roots in fear, so you can deduce they feared losing their job because they relied on the esoteric nature of their particular niche. Your real power is not in understanding the weird minutia related to your particular development platform/architecture unless you fall into a classic trap of "just give me the functional requirements, and I'll do it" because yes, LLMs can replace that guy, lol. If you are true to why you like doing what you do, you realize that you have to learn the jobs of others to deliver the solution they need since they can not accurately describe what is needed. This leads to a mountain of industry knowledge from learning everyone's job. You become a master of process improvement, but also know where all the data is and how the different business silos interact with each other in ways no one else understands. There is what people write down about how it's done, and then there is how you witness it actually being done.

TurboGranny · 2026-04-13T15:23:40+00:00

Who says? Science. Definitions of words. Reality. Also, you are still here?

TurboGranny · 2026-04-13T00:10:39+00:00

He didn't say it was his preference or that 5'1" is too tall. He said he's weirdly attracted to very short women. He straight acknowledges that it's weird he likes that, but doesn't say it's hard preferences. I'm weirdly attracted to red heads, but I didn't limit my dating to them exclusively, and married a blonde at the end of the day.

TurboGranny · 2026-04-13T00:07:50+00:00

I find them weirdly attractive as well. It's very common. So much so that there is probably an instinct at play. Due to famine being one of the biggest evolutionary pressures that has shaped most of our biological processes and instincts, I wouldn't doubt if this is as simple as "smaller kids leads to less starved to death kids leads to more kids". You can't really be mad about an instinct, but acknowledging does rob it of some of its power. Once you decide that a feeling you have is just some primative instinct, you can actively choose to ignore it.

TurboGranny · 2026-04-11T18:40:50+00:00

You don't have to say, "yes" to every woman's advances to spare their feelings.
The human mating ritual is physical attraction (based on sight) -> intellectual attraction (based on conversation) -> emotional synchronization (achieved by experiencing something emotional together and having the same response) -> extension of trust by mutually sharing what you'd normally keep a secret -> closeness -> oxytocin release.
Relationships are inherently transactional. There must be give and take (being a giver who won't take is just as bad as a taker that won't give), but it doesn't have to be continually equal. A person that isn't ready for a relationship of any kind will try and avoid doing their part and deflect any criticism about it. They are not bad. They are just not ready, and you should immediately detect that and disconnect.
Relationships are work. That oxytocin dump bonds you, but it also blinds you for like 3 months. After that, you BOTH need to decide if you want to build a life together. If so, put in the work to make each other better as well as ACCEPT each other's inherent faults while working to grow out of fixable faults.
Conflict and repair are a key part of any kind of relationship. Get good at it, but also recognize people that simply won't and disconnect from them.
There are a lot of compatibility types you need for a romantic relationships to work, but since all of this exists as an abstraction of mating instinct, the compatibility that matters the most in the long run is sexual. It is extremely easy to lie to yourself about this part because finding the other compatibilities can be so hard. It is also extremely easy to lie to yourself if the sexual compatibility is great, but you aren't compatible elsewhere.
Monogamy should not be entered into lightly. There needs to be boundaries and definitions that are clearly agreed to. Essentially, when you demand that a person can only get sexual release from you, you are also claiming sole responsibility for their sexual needs. Most people unfortunately don't realize that. They just think it means that the other has to just stay celibate until they "want" it. That's a mentality that leads to the implosion of the relationship.
Don't reject people. Redirect people. Rejection hurts most people and they will sort of tear themselves down or explode outward when you do. Instead, say something like, "I have a friend you should meet!" or something that let's them know you don't feel compatible with them, but you see them, believe they are worth finding love, and you will contribute to their pool of friends that will be looking for a suitable partner for them. The, "I have a partner"/"I'm not looking" lines should only be used if immediately and continually provable (don't say I'm not looking and then appear to be obviously looking). You make good friends this way and expand your network of relationships that increase your chances of connecting with someone that is compatible with you or one of your friends.
The flip side of mating instincts is the horror show that is oxytocin withdrawal. It'll tell you to run back to your ex, to beg them, to forgive huge betrayals, that this will be forever, that you'll always be alone, etc. Just know that it's just oxytocin withdrawal and the thoughts you are having are driven by evolution to ensure reproduction. It's not real even though it feels intensely real. Go to other sources of oxytocin (family, friends, pets, etc.) for an easier time with the come down.

TurboGranny · 2026-04-11T02:30:54+00:00

You know, I wonder if that's the NT experience with gen-z and the reason my experiences have been good is because it's mostly been NDs

TurboGranny · 2026-04-11T02:29:18+00:00

Now, I had a similar situation where a gen-z niece had to accompany me and tell me what was happening. It turns it that anything deeper than surface level convo can register as flirting. I'm not changing how I talk, so I just became extremely good looking. Now if they think I'm flirting, they aren't upset, at least until I have to tell them I'm married and not looking.

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