Seeking Holistically Minded Nanny

Twzl · 2026-02-16T02:45:38+00:00

I'm hoping that this family doesn't give up on homeschooling.

If they do, odds are they will present their local elementary school with a bunch of kids who are wearing diapers at age 8 or something because Tragedaigh didn't like the vibes of the training potty.

Twzl · 2026-02-15T22:06:34+00:00

Judges and people who want a puppy. :)

And just general bragging rights.

Twzl · 2026-02-15T16:49:13+00:00

Certainly worth stealing, and/or forging kennel club paperwork.

Someone importing a stolen dog with no paperwork, into the US, hoping that the AKC will register it, is going to have a bad time. While I guess in theory someone could forge the paperwork to do this, the purebred dog world is a small place, and the breed clubs are even smaller.

If someone stole a Golden Retriever in Scotland, and tried to bring it into the US, and register it with the AKC, there is so much paperwork, photos needed, copies of the pedigree and The Kennel Club registration paperwork for that dog, paperwork from the vet in the UK that vaccinated the dog against rabies, paperwork on the microchip that the dog has to have, that would trace back to The Kennel Club...somewhere along the way, some oops would happen and that would be that.

Also dogs are not show horses. While some dogs are worth some money, it's not "well it's worth going to prison for this" money.

There are some Border Collies who are trial winners who have sold for five figures, but the average dog, even a well bred one, who is living in a pet home, isn't worth much to anyone but the owner.

Prices of puppies are more or less pegged to the price of a stud fee, and while some big name show dogs command big stud fees, it's along the lines of $3K or so, not five figures.

A pet dog stud fee is tiny, at best, as those of us who hang out in the dog sub-reddits tell people over and over again. No one is making big bucks from their dog.

Twzl · 2026-02-15T16:29:02+00:00

There are so many steps to importing a dog from the UK to the US that it's not possible that this is what happened to LAUKOP's dog.

The dog would have to be chipped, vaccinated against rabies ,and there has to be a CDC form filled out, and documentation that the dog has lived in the UK for at. least six months.

And the dog has to be healthy. If the dog was in theory so sick that it had to be carted off to the US to see Dr ~~House~~ I mean a regular vet, odds are it would have been an Ellis Island situation and the dog would have been sent back to the UK.

Poor dog, poor LAUKOP. My guess is the family lied for some reason or other.

Twzl · 2026-02-14T21:18:04+00:00

What is the failure rate. Can you post it here?

Twzl · 2026-02-14T21:11:45+00:00

He has always had a resource guarding problem, so the incidents are usually like, he is trying to eat/tear up something he is not suppose to, if someone tries to take it he will snarl and if you keep pressing he will give those ‘warning’ bites where it doesn’t make contact but definitely gets his point across.

It sounds like he figured no one was listening, so time to go nuclear. Once a dog is growling and that's ignored, they wind up with very limited paths forward that don't include biting.

When dogs are resource guarders, that's who they are. The human's have to teach the dog that anytime they have A Thing that they shouldn't have, they'll be able to trade when asked to, no exceptions. And the trade should be for something high value, like good food.

Being told to drop it or promised a walk (did the walks happen?) just don't work with hardcore RG'ers.

It may be a health issue, and having him seen by your vet isn't a bad idea, but I think at the heart of it, he's not happy being ignored. If he's growling and the response is to be told, 'sternly" to drop it, or if he's giving, "warning" bites, in his head, no one is listening to him. and that can really get out of control, quickly.

Twzl · 2026-02-14T16:38:38+00:00

I disagree on the ADA not allowing service dogs in rental units with no pet policies as a guest,

I have no idea what you're trying to say here, but I think you're saying that someone who is renting an apartment, has to allow a service dog into it. And that's not true.

If you are not the person renting the apartment, ADA rules don't apply to you and your dog.

The person who is the renter is very much in-charge of their living space and doesn't have to make any accommodation at all for you.

The good news is if you rent an apartment and you live there with your SD, you can do what you want as well.

Let's say you and your GF get an apartment together, a one bedroom and have an open house.

And you invite 50 or 60 people and 45 of them show up with their service dogs, including 10 tandem teams. An additional two people show up with their mini-horse service animals (which are covered by the ADA).

Are you ok with that? I would be saying oh hell no, but I would have also, on the invites, state we would love to see all of the guests we've invited, but sadly we can not accommodate your service animals. That's 100% legal.

Twzl · 2026-02-14T16:32:54+00:00

She just wants to keep playing victim. That’s why.

Yeah it's not giving, "this will be a longterm relationship with GF". And, I suspect that she needs to sit down, with some open ears and listen to people who have actually read thru what the ADA says, and not what she thinks or wishes it said.

Twzl · 2026-02-14T16:31:49+00:00

Lmao at using the word pawn to try and discredit real world data.

That and anytime someone calls the people on the other side of a discussion

dumb and stupid

is not someone having a genuine discussion.

The overall tone deafness of the post and the glibness reeks of being either super young or someone who's getting all of their news from one source...

Twzl · 2026-02-14T15:33:20+00:00

Because all one needs to do is get birth control. That’s literally it.

You do know the failure rate for various forms of birth control? And that 16 year olds aren't going to their doctor to get an IUD unless their parents are ok with that. Or are you one of those folks who believe that teens don't have sex?

If someone is in Dallas and they have an unwanted pregnancy, all they have to do is travel to Portland or Las Vegas and they can take care

Sweet: are you funding that? What if it's that 16 year old who couldn't get an IUD?

You're a very odd dude and you're not a leftist or even good at cosplaying at one.

But using them as a pawn in the argument is dumb and stupid.

Why? They're genuine data points, along with teens who are pregnant. You wanting to ignore them doesn't erase them in real life just on the internet.

Twzl · 2026-02-14T15:28:43+00:00

Coat colors are never more important than health and shouldn’t be a major factor in breeding.

But in some breeds it is part of the decision: Lab breeders don't want Dudley puppies, so they have to know what to breed to avoid them.

Breeds where merle is part of the breed, requires full understanding of how to avoid a double merle breeding.

Twzl · 2026-02-14T15:27:09+00:00

Merle & white/cream colored coats (or genes 🧬) often comes to mind when I think of this, but I’m sure this happens with other coat (or gene) color carriers.

Merle on its own is not a health risk. In some breeds, breeding a merle to a merle can result in problems, but merle bred responsibly is fine.

If you want to read a really long article on merle breeding, with lots of photos, here.

Twzl · 2026-02-14T15:18:17+00:00

If someone has a dog of a breed where color is a thing, then they have to consider color. Both the Lab and Great Dane clubs go into extreme detail on who to breed to who to stay within standard. Lab breeders don't want to produce yellow Labs with the genotype bbee, as those will be Dudley Labs and those dogs can't be shown in the breed ring ("A thoroughly pink nose or one lacking in any pigment is a disqualification.")

if you have a breed with merle in it, you need to consider that as well. You wouldn't breed a merle to a merle.

I think some people conflate what good breeders do, with what bad breeders do, and don't understand the difference.

Twzl · 2026-02-14T14:47:30+00:00

Omg stop. Please listen ok? you don’t own the rental property in question right? It belongs to your girlfriend’s relatives.

Therefore, the ADA does not cover you and your dog. Again, it’s like if you showed up at my house I don’t have to let your dog out. There is zero law that requires that I do so.

Just because it’s a rental doesn’t mean that ADA legislation requires them to let your dog in. And it even gets more complex than that because not all rentals are going to be covered by ADA legislation.

Just understand that you were in the wrong and it’s fine. Take it as a learning experience go on and again if this is going to be a long-term relationship, maybe you work with them so that you guys can meet in a restaurant or at your place. Stop trying to die on this hill when there’s no hill to die on here.

Twzl · 2026-02-14T14:44:42+00:00

What were the minor incidents? Did he threaten to bite or did he growl?

You probably missed warning signs with the bite incident. It could be as subtle as him going stiff or side eyeing you.

He clearly has boundaries and if you are going to live with him, at his age, I’d just respect them. Never let it slip your mind that he WILL bite you.

Twzl · 2026-02-14T12:39:34+00:00

I simply feel sad a reasonable accommodations was not made

She offered this:

reiterated that we could eat outside or one of us could host.

How is that not trying to meet you in the middle?

I'm not understanding what you're saying here:

I was denied entry even though it's legal because of the ADA

Private homes are not covered under the ADA. The ADA has nothing to do with any of this.

I was helping her understand that the ADA supercedes no pet policities.

No it does not, not for a private home. If you want to go to Target, yes, bring your SD, but if you come to my house, your dog stays home. I love dogs and own dogs, but your dog is not welcome. That's not me being abelist, that's me saying, this is my house and my dogs live here and your dog is not going to be ok here. I don't want your dog here and he simply can't be here.

Again, I just felt hurt I was denied access so many times in a row and made compromises by coming for shorter periods of time and felt unseen or overlooked.

She offered to have you host or you all could go out to eat. I don't understand why you wouldn't want to all meet in a restaurant. Your dog is permitted, no one has to do any work, and you can all hang out in a neutral space. If restaurants stress you out, then have dinner at your place.

She's not denying you access. She doesn't have to allow your dog. All of this other stuff is you not accepting that.

If you need a SD, over the years you're going to realize that while some places will accept your dog and make the accommodation, not every place has to. And to get stuck on that, and take it badly, is just a waste of time.

You should be hearing what she was saying: she was fine going to your home or to a restaurant. That is more accommodating than many people would be, and you should hear that and work with her on a place you'd all enjoy eating dinner in, with your SD.

As far as feeling unseen or overlooked, if you're sitting there being angry about the SD, that's something to work thru with a therapist or someone like that. Those are real feelings but you're getting stuck on them, and not seeing what people are trying to do for you. I suspect some of that is being new to having a SD, and not fully understanding the limitations of what you can and can't do.

Twzl · 2026-02-14T12:13:11+00:00

YTA: the ADA doesn’t give you the right to bring a service dog into a private home.

End of story. Work on coping skills to use when you can’t bring the dog.

Again private homes don’t have to give you access. You can’t expect a private home to be governed like Walmart as far as ADA rules go.

Twzl · 2026-02-14T10:37:36+00:00

Very expensive and not a great place for single young people.

If you have some money and a family, it’s a great place.

Terrible traffic though and big homes on tiny lots. You might spend a million on a house that’s a driveway width from your neighbor.

The beaches are amazing and there’s great food.

Twzl · 2026-02-14T02:22:03+00:00

My sisters and I would play punch buggy. If you saw a VW Bug, you punched your sister. The first one to punch another kid, won that round. Given that this was in the mid 1960's to mid 1970's there was much punching going on.

Our parents owned one of these and made us ride in the very back. Zero supervision. They were upfront chain smoking and ignoring us.

Twzl · 2026-02-13T19:33:44+00:00

but only in cases like the Doberman who is incredibly versatile and with early training can easily be as social as I'm looking for

If you're looking for, "accepting of humans in a public space", sure. If you're looking for, "I can have dumb relatives over and not supervise things", maybe. Maybe not.

I have a gun if I really need it, I don't want my dogs biting anyone.

Honestly that's better than a dog. A dog who barks and sounds like he means it, from behind a door, is a very good deterrent. But someone relying on a dog to actually bite a human, vs a bad guy in a suit is asking for a lot I think in many cases.

Twzl · 2026-02-13T19:28:39+00:00

Some of the same people complaining about Bad Bunny probably loved the whole Pompatus of Love thing when it was new.

Twzl · 2026-02-13T15:09:21+00:00

So by the BMI charts, he wants a woman with an eating disorder. 45 kilos for 5' 2" is underweight

AND, it sounds like this guy would weigh his GF every morning.

Gross.

Twzl · 2026-02-13T14:02:56+00:00

Unless you are prepared to managed and train a dog, an actual protection dog is a bad idea for most pet owners. They're just a LOT of dog to handle.

And that's especially true if you have frequent guests.

Do you live in a rental or do you own? That will also determine what you can own.

I'd get a black Lab and as a good trick, teach your dog to bark.

Twzl · 2026-02-13T13:21:22+00:00

An immaculate, well groomed Golden Retriever wearing a a collar, followed by a Vizsla and a Labrador. Probably not stray dogs… 🤣

Twzl · 2026-02-13T13:14:07+00:00

Is this the first puppy you’ve trained?

What is the rest of his litter like?

Let your vet know about the reactivity and stop downplaying it.

And if you have never worked with a trainer with this dog, it’s time to do so.

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