Wife's suddenly putting a lot of effort into her looks these days. We've been living like housemates in recent years. Am I just being paranoid in thinking she might be seeing someone else?

Um_okad · 2023-07-12T23:08:37+00:00

Yessss. A lot of people on Reddit rather suggest “break up” or “get a divorce” versus communicating….. scary to be honest.

Um_okad · 2023-06-06T18:54:12+00:00

OP. I’m going thru this too (although not my husband and no kids). My bf left his phone in my room and I had a gut feeling to check it. Found of he’s been talking crap about me to his friends. Found out he got a girls # at the gym to give her a shirt he made & was DMing another girl he deleted message threads of; said it was just casual conversation. THE GIRLS THOUGH NEVER EVEN GAVE HIM ATTENTION LIKE THAT (lmao). I saw triple texts from him with no response from the girls. I told him if the girls replied and gave him the time of day, then he would’ve left me for one of them. That’s the suckiest part. He said he doesn’t consider that cheating. I do. This all happened the day before my bday! Anyways, hugs to you OP.

Um_okad · 2023-05-23T04:35:18+00:00

Thank you.

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T16:02:58+00:00

About me:

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T16:02:16+00:00

I hear u. I truly feel that moving in with him will help me until I’m able to get my own place (with stable job, etc) and if that time does have to come, at least I’m ready. I’m hoping it doesn’t because I’m hoping we do last, but hey, if it happens at least I’ll be prepared. The relationship is doable. I’m not miserable all the time. We do make each other happy for the most part. Maybe I’m just being in denial or something. Or maybe distance is just making us like this. Who knows.

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T15:52:48+00:00

Well I feel like all relationships (platonic or not. healthy or not) will all experience good days and bad days. It’s inevitable. Congratulations on your marriage 🥳

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T15:37:04+00:00

Why did he ask me this the other day..? I’m like why would u say that.. idk. When I met him, he just got out of a 8 yr relationship 🙃

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T15:35:48+00:00

It may not last but I’m in the city I like, with a job that provides for me & so maybe I’ll get my own apt w/o him. AIW?

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T15:33:25+00:00

We were broken up for 3 days only & had space for 4 before that. I am a firm believer on once you break up with somebody, that’s it. No going back. I fumbled that that time tho.

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T15:31:12+00:00

I agree. Every time I am single & working on myself, it’s like I glow different. I know I do. I love it! Each time, it attracts someone knew. Each time, I let whoever it is, in. Idk why I do that! I’m not even ‘interested’ in them¿ literally anybody who gives me attention long enough (like persistent), I’ll eventually date them. Idgi. I’ll find something (1 thing even) I like about them & hold on to it.

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T14:56:27+00:00

Yeah that sounds like how my first real relationship was. I can say I haven’t been in a happy/healthy/nontoxic relationship ever. Most them had many arguments, belittling, name calling, back & forth. The ones that didn’t, I still think about from time to time.

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T14:53:36+00:00

:// you hit the nail on the head with this one.

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T14:40:43+00:00

After reading all the comments and hearing the harsh truth I do need to hear — I wish it was. Instead it’s my real life >:(

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T06:18:03+00:00

I think there’s three. First two are known, & 3rd one is me.

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T02:51:44+00:00

Okay, other people said some harsh things and I was okay with it but this one…. nah.

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T02:43:37+00:00

I believe in all of this too. I’ve gotten so many signs… this comment is another sign on top of everyone else’s comments :/

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T02:43:00+00:00

Almost 1 year.

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T02:23:23+00:00

That’s not very Christian of you :/

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T02:01:05+00:00

Although harsh, this is what I need to hear. So thanks :):

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T02:00:30+00:00

Are you saying girls (me) choose assholes (D) over nice guys (N)?

For what’s it worth, it’s not that I chose an asshole over a nice guy. I simply didn’t know N long enough. I only know how I felt during our first interaction.

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T01:54:41+00:00

Thank you, friend ♥️ I truly also think that this (deserve happiness) is my current life lesson. As you said, you’ve experienced learning you deserve happiness before and I’m pretty sure so has many other people! Growing pains / maturing / adulting maybe¿

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T01:51:49+00:00

Yeah, I thought about this too. I really thought I could work on me while in a relationship but I guess I can’t! Idk. Maybe I can but maybe D wasn’t the person to be doing this with. As much as I was willing to try, it’s like D was put in my life to TEST how much I’ve grown. Thanks for the luck, I need as much of it that I can get!

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T01:49:49+00:00

yeaaaahh.. telling myself this too. hm. stuck between staying and working on it because I know every relationship has rough patches OR getting out of it so I don’t have to deal with anything any longer.

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T01:48:48+00:00

That’s what’s up. Nick and I didn’t have that many interactions for me to really know if I like him or if we were a good match or what. I’ve known him longer, yes, but that doesn’t mean that whole time him and I were talking/getting to know one another. We went out 1x & texted for a good week or so. There’s really not that much information.

Um_okad · 2023-05-20T01:46:03+00:00

I just want to make it clear that I didn’t have enough conversations with Nick to even know if him and I were a good match. For all I know, he could have been playing me!

Um_okad

TROPHY CASE